She should open with 'Whaddaya think of Tottenham?' and go from there into a full-blown, no-holds-barred version of 'We hate Tottenham', including the racial epithets and gas noises.
I hear that B. In that case a bit of 'The Famous Alan Mullery went to Rome to sign the Pope' thrown in
I'd love to hear Her Maj shout 'Fúck Off'
'Seems that I was busy doing something close to nothing
But different than the day before'
'Met a dwarf that was no good, dressed like Little Red Riding Hood'
'Now you're unemployed, all non-void
Walkin' round like you're Pretty Boy Floyd'