I believe I have arm cancer.

[Sir C]

Probably not. It could be the running, of course. All that arm-pumping catching up with you.

Do you lift?

I did some lifting but stopped when both my arms apparently snapped above the elbow. They don't seem to be fixing themselves.

[Burney]

I did some lifting but stopped when both my arms apparently snapped above the elbow. They don't seem to be fixing themselves.

Ah. What you've done - and excuse me using the technical term - is fùcked your arms.

You'll receive my invoice for this consultation shortly. Good day.

[Sir C]

Ah. What you've done - and excuse me using the technical term - is fùcked your arms.

You'll receive my invoice for this consultation shortly. Good day.

I can get an online appointment with a doctor for £7! I'm going to give it a go.

[Burney]

I can get an online appointment with a doctor for £7! I'm going to give it a go.

Can you check his bona fides beforehand?

It'll be tendonitis, btw.

[Sir C]

Can you check his bona fides beforehand?

It'll be tendonitis, btw.

I don't care about his boner, I just want a referral letter.

It ain't tendons, it's bonular I CAN FEEL IT IN MY BONES.

[Burney]

I don't care about his boner, I just want a referral letter.

It ain't tendons, it's bonular I CAN FEEL IT IN MY BONES.

That's because tendons are attached to your bones, mate. I have rotator cuff tendonitis in my shoulder that flares up when I throw balls or serve in tennis. Makes it go all weak and hurty.

[Sir C]

That's because tendons are attached to your bones, mate. I have rotator cuff tendonitis in my shoulder that flares up when I throw balls or serve in tennis. Makes it go all weak and hurty.

Why are you trying to hijack my armbone cancer?