I came late to Detectorists. I'm just watching the second series now.

[Sir C]

Also, I wish he'd put his bony arms away. They gross me out. I don't really understand how people are that skinny without snapping.

Also, don't get me started on the canary yellow TR7. One of those wánkers who thinks he drives a 'classic car' because it's more than 25 years old. (See also all MG enthusiasts.) The car was shít the day it rolled off the production line, mate, and the passage of a quarter of a century is unlikely to have improved its dynamic capabilities.

****.

[Burney]

Also, don't get me started on the canary yellow TR7. One of those wánkers who thinks he drives a 'classic car' because it's more than 25 years old. (See also all MG enthusiasts.) The car was shít the day it rolled off the production line, mate, and the passage of a quarter of a century is unlikely to have improved its dynamic capabilities.

****.

I used to get lifts to work with a rather pretty sales lady who insisted on driving one of them - canary yellow, too. Not only did one look ridiculous in it, it was forever going wrong, so I'd have to get the bus.

If I hadn't fancied her rotten (and needed a lift), I'd probably have sacked off the whole arrangement.

She turned out to be a lesbian.

[Pokster]

I used to get lifts to work with a rather pretty sales lady who insisted on driving one of them - canary yellow, too. Not only did one look ridiculous in it, it was forever going wrong, so I'd have to get the bus.

If I hadn't fancied her rotten (and needed a lift), I'd probably have sacked off the whole arrangement.

She turned out to be a lesbian.

Was she a Lesbian before you fancied her or did the thought of your overly white hairy body turn her?

[Burney]

Was she a Lesbian before you fancied her or did the thought of your overly white hairy body turn her?

I couldn't say. She just turned up at an event one evening with a short-haired woman in tow. This made a lot of people who'd tried it on with her and failed feel a lot better about things.

My body wasn't particularly hairy back then, I don't think. Indeed, I was quite smooth.

My whiteness I couldn't really help, you racist.

[Pokster]

I couldn't say. She just turned up at an event one evening with a short-haired woman in tow. This made a lot of people who'd tried it on with her and failed feel a lot better about things.

My body wasn't particularly hairy back then, I don't think. Indeed, I was quite smooth.

My whiteness I couldn't really help, you racist.

So you are clinging to the hope that you didn't turn her.......

[Peter]

She turned out to be a lesbian.

No, she didn't. Because you don't believe in them, remember.

She made a political choice to avoid men, specifically you

[Burney]

No, she didn't. Because you don't believe in them, remember.

She made a political choice to avoid men, specifically you

Quite so, quite so. I was really just using the term 'lesbian' as shorthand for her delusionary condition. She's almost certainly happily married to a bloke called Steve and has three kids these days.

[Peter]

Quite so, quite so. I was really just using the term 'lesbian' as shorthand for her delusionary condition. She's almost certainly happily married to a bloke called Steve and has three kids these days.

Imagine what a lesbian couple are like. One woman is enough to ruin any relationship.....

[Sir C]

I used to get lifts to work with a rather pretty sales lady who insisted on driving one of them - canary yellow, too. Not only did one look ridiculous in it, it was forever going wrong, so I'd have to get the bus.

If I hadn't fancied her rotten (and needed a lift), I'd probably have sacked off the whole arrangement.

She turned out to be a lesbian.

Yes, I once actually performed the foul deed within the confines of a TR7; this event may have taken place, if my memory does me no disservice, in the car park of Finchley Golf Club.

A regrettable, cramped and uncomfortable, of ultimately satisfying, experience.

The car in question was one of the few automatics built, by the way. A three-speed unit, this was not a gearbox of which the British motor industry should be proud.

[Pokster]

Yes, I once actually performed the foul deed within the confines of a TR7; this event may have taken place, if my memory does me no disservice, in the car park of Finchley Golf Club.

A regrettable, cramped and uncomfortable, of ultimately satisfying, experience.

The car in question was one of the few automatics built, by the way. A three-speed unit, this was not a gearbox of which the British motor industry should be proud.

That is what probably started your shoulder problem.... were you shagging the Lesbian or berni?