Dr Rich I am having a gentleman's issue

[Burney]

I had a chum who developed warts on his bell end; like tiny little cauliflowers, they were. Anyway, he was sent to hospital to have them lasered off, which resulted in him having to pull a lengthy dressing out of his todger, like a magician pulling hankies out of his sleeve... but I digress. After the lasering he realised that he now had two Jap's eyes, and consequently could píss into two urinals at once, a trick which was much appreciated by an enthusiastic crowd on many occasions.

It doesn't help you, I know. I just like telling the story.

I'd be pretty miffed if the medicos burnt a hole in my bell, tbh.

[Sir C]

I'd be pretty miffed if the medicos burnt a hole in my bell, tbh.

Worse, the cauliflowers grew back. He ended up consulting the Indian mystic who had cured my mother of a mystery ailment, and was prescribed a special diet: Week one, 4 pounds of grapes per day, nothing else. Week two: 8 grilled oranges per day, nothing else. And so on, for 8 weeks or so, after which he declared himself cured and well pleased with the treatment.

[Burney]

Worse, the cauliflowers grew back. He ended up consulting the Indian mystic who had cured my mother of a mystery ailment, and was prescribed a special diet: Week one, 4 pounds of grapes per day, nothing else. Week two: 8 grilled oranges per day, nothing else. And so on, for 8 weeks or so, after which he declared himself cured and well pleased with the treatment.

Well I hope the mystic washed his hands before touching your mum.

[Sir C]

Well I hope the mystic washed his hands before touching your mum.

He treated me for a football injury once and I was amazed at the result.

I didn't realise he was so famous, actually. Here is his Guardian obit https://www.theguardian.com/news/200...dianobituaries

And here a list of his remedies http://www.secretsofnaturalhealth.com/comail.html

[Burney]

He treated me for a football injury once and I was amazed at the result.

I didn't realise he was so famous, actually. Here is his Guardian obit https://www.theguardian.com/news/200...dianobituaries

And here a list of his remedies http://www.secretsofnaturalhealth.com/comail.html

Right. You definitely can't cure genital warts with fruit, though.

[Sir C]

Right. You definitely can't cure genital warts with fruit, though.

It works

I knew a guy who was disabled by appalling asthma. Cured.

My mother, ill for 27 years with an unknown, undiagnosable condition which had reached the stage where she was expected to die. Cured.

The pénis warts. Cured.