Things that are perfectly normal regardless of what one's wife says.

[Herbert Augustus Chapman]

1/ Breaking up an eggshell with your spoon upon finishing the consumption of a boiled egg because otherwise witches will use the empty eggshells as boats and go and sink sailors' ships.

This is perfectly normal and responsible behaviour and everyone does it. FACT.

Spending the whole of Sunday afternoon vigorously masturbating in one's wánking shed. "It's a wánking shed dear - it's what it's for!"