Imagine that cat suffered un crise d'estomac which resulted in the poor creature's rear end being almost entirely soaked in liquid shĂ*te, with many interesting soft lumps also embedded in the fur.

Now picture such a creature going about his morning duties, hopping from kitchen worktop to kitchen table, from floor to sofa, chair, windowsill and so forth.

The sight that greeted me when I entered my house at lunchtime was indescribable.

Have you ever tried washing a shĂ*t-soaked cat in a bucket? :shudder:

I wish I were dead.