I’ve been invited in my capacity as a picture caption writer…..ahem journalist….to a

[Sir C]

Yeah, I've been chatting to a few of them. I'm sure there'll be a few of those types, but ones I've interacted with so far seem totally sound, and equally worried about it being full of ****s.

I'm quite looking forward to it.

I assume I won't die?

No, you won't die. You might go screaming, wall-climbing mental, of course. But spending the rest of your life in a secure facility strikes me as rather peaceful, so crack on.