Unable, due to time constraints, to visit my usual tonsorial consultant,

[Rich]

I have today placed my follicles into the tender mercies of a local gentleman of middle-eastern appearance.

He set fire to my fúcking ears.

I found myself in a similar situation recently. Did he get a little paper ball on a metal stick, dip it in bright purple liquid & then light it?

Did it on my neck as well, he did. I didn't even sign a consent form.

[Sir C]

I found myself in a similar situation recently. Did he get a little paper ball on a metal stick, dip it in bright purple liquid & then light it?

Did it on my neck as well, he did. I didn't even sign a consent form.

He did. He also did things to my eyebrows.

I'd rather now draw a veil across the whole sordid matter.

[Burney]

He did. He also did things to my eyebrows.

I'd rather now draw a veil across the whole sordid matter.

This is the new normal in barber shops imo. The days of an old gentleman in a white coat clipping your barnet in about 3 minutes' flat and then asking you if you wanted something for the weekend are gone, I'm afraid. It's all about Ottoman pampering these days. The ears is the least of it. On one occasion they put a mud mask on me and waxed my nostrils, the cheeky cünts.