I am halfway through watching the excellent Ken Burns documentary on the US Civil War

[Sir C]

That’s right. There was a rather unfortunate moustache involved, wasn’t there?

Was there? I don't remember a moustache. It was over 10 years ago, I believe. The sword was good.

[Burney]

Was there? I don't remember a moustache. It was over 10 years ago, I believe. The sword was good.

Yes. You grew it special, I think.

Could you have done any damage with the sword?

[Herbert Augustus Chapman]

Yes. You grew it special, I think.

Could you have done any damage with the sword?

Could you two take your homosexualist semaphore to a private board. I'm sure the damage his 'sword' would have done to your a'hole would have been considerable b.

[Pokster]

Could you two take your homosexualist semaphore to a private board. I'm sure the damage his 'sword' would have done to your a'hole would have been considerable b.

Probably not now... b's ring has been severely damaged from constant buggerings while at private all boys school... and Sir C can't even get it up anymore

[Sir C]

Yes. You grew it special, I think.

Could you have done any damage with the sword?

Really? I have no memory of such a growth. Surely a stick on one would have been easier.

The impetuosity of youth, I suppose.

[Pokster]

Really? I have no memory of such a growth. Surely a stick on one would have been easier.

The impetuosity of youth, I suppose.

"Youth"

[SWv2]

Was there? I don't remember a moustache. It was over 10 years ago, I believe. The sword was good.

Fancy dress?

Blimey.

[Sir C]

Fancy dress?

Blimey.

Yes, my only experience of the genre, I think.

It was poor.

[Burney]

Yes, my only experience of the genre, I think.

It was poor.

I felt - and I hope that you don't take this the wrong way - that your uniform might have been a smidgeon better cut.