Are we really considering employing someone called 'Grandad Holy Ghost' as manager?

[WES]

But come on! You must accept that there is no other point during the year when you would dream of putting poultry, ham, sausages, gravy and pork-based stuffing on the same plate - not because Christmas is a unique feast, etc, but because those things just don't go together and all their individual charms become lost in the meaty melée.

Who in their right mind puts ham and poultry roasted on the same plate? And meat based stuffing is awful.

No, turkey or goose, bread based stuffing, roast veg and gravy with one chipolata is sensible, tasty and celebratory.

[Sir C]

Hmmm - what temperature did you cook them at? Ray's recipe is 1 hour at 140C covered, then 1/2 hour at a high temperarture then another hour at 140C. You add the breast for the hour in the middle.

140 generally with a final blast to crisp the skin.

It's just a big duck

[Luis Anaconda]

Yes, but aren't they better as a nibble than part of the meal?

Very true, b. Although I would happily just have a whole meal of them

[Sir C]

You have to have a big ham. It's not Christmas dinner without a fúcking massive ham.

You have no respect for the cultural sensitivities of the jewish community, I see.

Are you having your friends from Hamas round.

Hold on, that doesn't really work...

[WES]

I do the Raymond Blanc thing where you joint the goose (removing the wingbone, of course) and confit the legs and wings. It's very good.

Trouble is, this year I'll have to do a Turkey as well, as my stepsons profess to actually like the damn thing.

I'm slow roasting the legs and using the wings for stock/jus. But yes, completely joint the bird, which you should do with turkey as well BTW.

Braised turke legs are quite wonderful and always the star of my Christmas dinner. This year it will be slow roasted legs which are then de-boned, roughly chopped and mixed through with chunks of my foie gras.

[Burney]

Who in their right mind puts ham and poultry roasted on the same plate? And meat based stuffing is awful.

No, turkey or goose, bread based stuffing, roast veg and gravy with one chipolata is sensible, tasty and celebratory.

All normal English people.

You two foreigners wouldn't understand.

[Sir C]

All normal English people.

You two foreigners wouldn't understand.

A minute ago you were claiming to be a tick Paddy, for Christ's sake!

[Burney]

Very true, b. Although I would happily just have a whole meal of them

The lure of the small sausage is remarkable. Every year I make fancy nibbles. I make gravadlax, mini Lobster thermidors - that sort of thing. But I also make a big rake of chipolatas in honey and wholegrain mustard.

Guess which of these disappears most quickly.

[WES]

All normal English people.

You two foreigners wouldn't understand.

Whence I first arrived in England and was living in Barnes the local butcher (Bob, top chap) told me that English people eat turkey or goose on Christmas Day and leftovers and ham on Boxing Day.

I have eaten thus ever since. And sorry but I'm taking butcher Bob's view over yours.

[Burney]

You have no respect for the cultural sensitivities of the jewish community, I see.

Are you having your friends from Hamas round.

Hold on, that doesn't really work...

Just because they're called Hamas doesn't mean they like ham. That would be quite the faux pas.