'Monsieur Le President, eet eez not going so well! You 'ave ze rioting in ze streets

[Burney]

We are staying in the 5th I think, Rue des Écoles.

Goes without saying that any practical advice would be warmly accepted.

I didn’t get to see much or indeed any of the city centre pubs on the day of the final due to a massive cock up (fraud perhaps) with tickets so your kind directions based on the Frog & Rosbif are of no use.

Well the Rue des Ecoles is just north of the pub I've just mentioned. You could go to the English pub and enjoy some true culture, sw.

[SWv2]

Well the Rue des Ecoles is just north of the pub I've just mentioned. You could go to the English pub and enjoy some true culture, sw.

We are both urbane men of the world and I am sure you would admit that there is only so much culture any man can take on a given day.

The Mrs wants to go to see the Mona Lisa which I have pre-judged as being utter fúcking turd so a clatter of pints could be the ticket.

Then there is a rugby match on the Saturday and while I don’t strictly *like* rugby I can use it as an excuse for the pub.

[Sir C]

We are both urbane men of the world and I am sure you would admit that there is only so much culture any man can take on a given day.

The Mrs wants to go to see the Mona Lisa which I have pre-judged as being utter fúcking turd so a clatter of pints could be the ticket.

Then there is a rugby match on the Saturday and while I don’t strictly *like* rugby I can use it as an excuse for the pub.

Avoid the Louvre at all costs. It’s full of chinamen taking selfies. You won’t get within 30 yards of the Mona Lisa.

[Burney]

We are both urbane men of the world and I am sure you would admit that there is only so much culture any man can take on a given day.

The Mrs wants to go to see the Mona Lisa which I have pre-judged as being utter fúcking turd so a clatter of pints could be the ticket.

Then there is a rugby match on the Saturday and while I don’t strictly *like* rugby I can use it as an excuse for the pub.

Advice: Book your tickets to the Louvre online now, get there early and you'll be out in time for the pubs to open. Also, there's a far superior Da Vinci painting of John The Baptist in the same part of the gallery that isn't surrounded by our oriental chums snapping pictures of it. Spend more time looking at that.

[Burney]

Avoid the Louvre at all costs. It’s full of chinamen taking selfies. You won’t get within 30 yards of the Mona Lisa.

Great minds. There is some cracking stuff in there, but fighting your way around it all just grinds you down.

[SWv2]

Avoid the Louvre at all costs. It’s full of chinamen taking selfies. You won’t get within 30 yards of the Mona Lisa.

Oh I have little interest tbh but I am a good husband and will go along.

Naturally my main focus will on trying to locate this famous spot to recreate this iconic image of our time.

R-575135-1133378652.jpeg.jpg

[Burney]

Oh I have little interest tbh but I am a good husband and will go along.

Naturally my main focus will on trying to locate this famous spot to recreate this iconic image of our time.

R-575135-1133378652.jpeg.jpg

Seriously, book online. Buying tickets there will take you an age.

[SWv2]

Seriously, book online. Buying tickets there will take you an age.

Pretty sure she has done that as she expressed both amazement and joy that kids get in for free.

Cannot even put into words how bored they will be.

[Burney]

Pretty sure she has done that as she expressed both amazement and joy that kids get in for free.

Cannot even put into words how bored they will be.

We took a 15 an 10 year-old there last year. They did alright.

You will be assailed by hordes of Africans trying to sell you Eiffel Tower keychains. Brace yourself and practise ignoring them.

[Ganpati's Goonerz--AFC's Aboriginal Fertility Cult]

We are both urbane men of the world and I am sure you would admit that there is only so much culture any man can take on a given day.

The Mrs wants to go to see the Mona Lisa which I have pre-judged as being utter fúcking turd so a clatter of pints could be the ticket.

Then there is a rugby match on the Saturday and while I don’t strictly *like* rugby I can use it as an excuse for the pub.

I'll PM you later so you have info to hand.

If you want cheap French grub - 3 courses for 10-15 quid, you're in just the right area. (Depending which end of Rue des Ecoles.)

I used to live in the 5e in '95. St Michel still has the best cheap grub in Paris.

And you have no worries of rioters. They don't let us go to the 5th and the 6th. Too many little streets. Too difficult to guard. So you won't see us on Saturday.

But I would say instead of the Louvre, why not go to the D'Orsay? Again, it's walking distance. On the left (south) bank in the 6th.

There you have half of the greatest ever Monets, some of the very finest Van Goghs, basically the whole of impressionism.

I'd deffo choose that but its personal. The Mona Lisa's ****. The Carravaggio's in the National in London are far better. Do the D'Orsay, go to a meal in St Michel - breaking up the walk back to the hotel - and then find a bar you fancy. Most around there will still be happy hour on a Sat night so you can get pints.

Put Rue de la Harpe into google maps. That's the cheap restaurants St Michel bits.

Any questions feel free to ask.

All the best.