Good news - I've won that postcode lottery thing . Got the letter

[Herbert Augustus Chapman]

i even get moaned at for small things. ‘You just bought it why are you changing the strings?’
Or
‘Why don’t you get a nice blue or green one?’

Tell me abaaaht it !!!! Mine even had the impudence to suggest I actually learn to play mine! Thinks that duck walking around the living room is unseemly in a man of my age and pointing out that Chuck was doing it in his 70's cuts no ice.

[Herbert Augustus Chapman]

Mother of Christ. If you don't mind I'd rather remain focussed on her arse; the face is too scary.

I bet her growler resembles a Big Mac c

[Luis Anaconda]

Mother of Christ. If you don't mind I'd rather remain focussed on her arse; the face is too scary.

CLLb71bWsAEUEUX.jpg
I though this was the new-look Carol these days

[Pat Vegas]

CLLb71bWsAEUEUX.jpg
I though this was the new-look Carol these days

she's too revealing therefore not as exciting.

[SWv2]

this morning informing me I was £325,000 richer and with a bona fide London number to call to confirm.

A very pleasant african gentleman then explained I merely had to pay a fee of £500.00 and my winnings would be processed into my account. I said they could simply deduct the fee from my winnings to save admin fees but he said that it is the law, which he pronounce dee lah, that I must pay the fee first - bit of a nuisance what?

How should I invest my winnings 'wimb? I've already booked an all inclusive 5 star hotel on the Amalfi with my credit card so there should be about 320K left.

A new set of wrenches and perhaps new overalls.

[Herbert Augustus Chapman]

A new set of wrenches and perhaps new overalls.

Oh mock me would you? I was going to buy you a nice little caravan in Rathkeale s but you can do one now.

[Pokster]

CLLb71bWsAEUEUX.jpg
I though this was the new-look Carol these days

I see she is just about to draw an I so they can spell Sir C

[Luis Anaconda]

I see she is just about to draw an I so they can spell Sir C

You were looking at the letters? Pervert

[Pokster]

You were looking at the letters? Pervert

Well I have seen far better pictures of her than that... I seem to remember Nicosia had a "thing" for her... the dirty dog

[Sir C]

Well I have seen far better pictures of her than that... I seem to remember Nicosia had a "thing" for her... the dirty dog

Pic? Her, not Nicosia.