Baby Boris

[Burney]

Almost nine months to the day since he became PM

Well if a chap can't celebrate becoming PM by rogering his bint, I don't know what the world's coming to, la.

[Luis Anaconda]

Well if a chap can't celebrate becoming PM by rogering his bint, I don't know what the world's coming to, la.

Oh, I've no problem with that at all. I was going to add that many a king would admire his ability to produce on demand, so to speak

[Burney]

Oh, I've no problem with that at all. I was going to add that many a king would admire his ability to produce on demand, so to speak

Clearly a chap who - rightly - eschews the condom. Ghastly things.

[Herbert Augustus Chapman]

Clearly a chap who - rightly - eschews the condom. Ghastly things.

I rather hope he wore at least two when he was firing it up that ghastly american pole dancer.

[Burney]

I rather hope he wore at least two when he was firing it up that ghastly american pole dancer.

I can't believe a chap of Boris's appetites will content himself with monogamy during his term in office, so I greatly look forward to him getting into all sorts of sexual scrapes over the next few years as he throws his leg over various unsuitable females. All good fun imo.

[Herbert Augustus Chapman]

I can't believe a chap of Boris's appetites will content himself with monogamy during his term in office, so I greatly look forward to him getting into all sorts of sexual scrapes over the next few years as he throws his leg over various unsuitable females. All good fun imo.

My contacts in higher circles inform me that Boris is rather poorly endowed so as soon as childbirth reduces his woman's clacker to something resembling a discarded Big Mac he's off to find something with a little more purchase.

[Burney]

My contacts in higher circles inform me that Boris is rather poorly endowed so as soon as childbirth reduces his woman's clacker to something resembling a discarded Big Mac he's off to find something with a little more purchase.

How odd. I'd heard that it was huge, almost permanently engorged and so covered in blue veins and well-used that it resembles nothing so much in appearance, odour and flavour as a well-aged Stilton.