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Thread: If you had to choose, which of these ladies would you decide to marry

  1. #1

    If you had to choose, which of these ladies would you decide to marry

    and spend the rest of your life with?

    1. Human Foghorn Jess Phillips
    2. Indefatigable turmagent and old soak Anna Soubry
    3. Fatso Diane Abbott

    Please show your workings.

  2. #2
    Quote Originally Posted by Sir C View Post
    and spend the rest of your life with?

    1. Human Foghorn Jess Phillips
    2. Indefatigable turmagent and old soak Anna Soubry
    3. Fatso Diane Abbott

    Please show your workings.
    Which is likely to die first?
    Northern Monkey ... who can't upload a bleeding Avatar

  3. #3
    Quote Originally Posted by Sir C View Post
    and spend the rest of your life with?

    1. Human Foghorn Jess Phillips
    2. Indefatigable turmagent and old soak Anna Soubry
    3. Fatso Diane Abbott

    Please show your workings.
    is this an ipsative choice?

    If not, suicide or benderness...
    “Other clubs never came into my thoughts once I knew Arsenal wanted to sign me.”

  4. #4
    Quote Originally Posted by Pokster View Post
    Which is likely to die first?
    Abbott's carrying about 16 stone of pure lard so her heart must be under some stress... on the other hand, Soubry's liver doesn't bear thinking about. Phillips is too sour to ever die, she'll go on being horrible about everything for all eternity.

  5. #5
    Quote Originally Posted by IUFG View Post
    is this an ipsative choice?

    If not, suicide or benderness...
    Mysoginist.

  6. #6
    Quote Originally Posted by Sir C View Post
    and spend the rest of your life with?

    1. Human Foghorn Jess Phillips
    2. Indefatigable turmagent and old soak Anna Soubry
    3. Fatso Diane Abbott

    Please show your workings.
    Hmmm. I couldn't go near Phillips due to the smell. Abbott's a no-no since if that's she looks like scrubbed up, imagine the state of it first thing in the morning.

    It'd have to be Soubry. I'd obviously devote my existence to making her live an utter misery and sexually degrading her, but such sacrifices must me made, I'm afraid.

  7. #7
    Quote Originally Posted by Sir C View Post
    Abbott's carrying about 16 stone of pure lard so her heart must be under some stress... on the other hand, Soubry's liver doesn't bear thinking about. Phillips is too sour to ever die, she'll go on being horrible about everything for all eternity.
    But could you imagine going where Jezza has been?
    “Other clubs never came into my thoughts once I knew Arsenal wanted to sign me.”

  8. #8
    Quote Originally Posted by Sir C View Post
    Mysoginist.
    Surely a Misogynist is someone who harbours an irrational hatred of fermented soy bean paste?


    AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

  9. #9
    It's like a nightmare edition of Blind Date

    Number 1's a Brummie so she's out
    Number 2 would drive me to drink which would be a fat lot of use if she's already been at the drinks cabinet
    Number 3 IS a fat lot of use who'd forever be using my razor to deal with her 5 O'Clock shadow so I'd have to grow a beard
    10 characters? Pile of cund.

  10. #10
    Quote Originally Posted by Burney View Post
    Hmmm. I couldn't go near Phillips due to the smell. Abbott's a no-no since if that's she looks like scrubbed up, imagine the state of it first thing in the morning.

    It'd have to be Soubry. I'd obviously devote my existence to making her live an utter misery and sexually degrading her, but such sacrifices must me made, I'm afraid.
    Imagine waking each morning to that screeching, opening your eyes and seeing her sour face an inch from yours, her gin-scented spittle flecking your face as she abuses you for whatever imagined slight her twisted sense of victimhood has conjured overnight.


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