Things that could have gone better on my trip to Naples last week

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06-22-2016, 01:52 PM
Monty92

Things that could have gone better on my trip to Naples last week

1) Not missing our flight (National Express delayed by 50 minutes. Cost of rebooking on the next flight 6 hours later on the other side of London = £130)
2) Not staying with the least welcoming and convivial Italian mother ever, whose idea of hospitality was giving me a wide berth every time she saw me and slamming a plate full of fried cheese balls in front of me for dinner, two nights in a row
3) Not driving two hours in the wrong direction to the beach, on the only sunny day
4) Not walking to our hire car to drive to the airport only to find it had been towed away and replaced by a street market, with no signs in sight (Cost or reclaiming our car = €150)

Apart form that, great trip.
06-22-2016, 01:53 PM
The Jorge

Quote:

Originally Posted by Monty92

1) Not missing our flight (National Express delayed by 50 minutes. Cost of rebooking on the next flight 6 hours later = £130)
2) Not staying with the least welcoming Italian mother ever, whose idea of hospitality was giving me a wide berth every time she saw me and slamming a plate full of cheese balls in front of me for dinner, two nights in a row
3) Not driving two hours in the wrong direction to the beach, on the only sunny day
4) Not walking to our hire car to drive to the airport only to find it had been towed away and replaced by a street market, with no signs in sight (Cost or reclaiming our car = €150)

Apart form that, great trip.

:hehe: Are you pitching to be the new Chevy Chase?

A less charitable soul would have said it serves you right for getting a coach.
06-22-2016, 01:56 PM
Monty92

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Jorge

:hehe: Are you pitching to be the new Chevy Chase?

A less charitable soul would have said it serves you right for getting a coach.

Oh yeah - I forgot to mention arriving at Gatwick after a 2-hour crawl across London from Stansted to check in to our re-booked flight and being told the flight had been (intentionally) over-booked and we would only be allowed on if there were no-shows.

And there was me thinking that ****ing a man would be my travelling nadir.
06-22-2016, 02:00 PM
Luis Anaconda

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Jorge

:hehe: Are you pitching to be the new Chevy Chase?

A less charitable soul would have said it serves you right for getting a coach.

:-( I had no choice but to get a coach last time I went to Gatwick as the rail line had works on it. It was utter hell. Victoria Coach Station could have been invented by Dante
06-22-2016, 02:01 PM
Luis Anaconda

Quote:

Originally Posted by Monty92

1) Not missing our flight (National Express delayed by 50 minutes. Cost of rebooking on the next flight 6 hours later on the other side of London = £130)
2) Not staying with the least welcoming and convivial Italian mother ever, whose idea of hospitality was giving me a wide berth every time she saw me and slamming a plate full of fried cheese balls in front of me for dinner, two nights in a row
3) Not driving two hours in the wrong direction to the beach, on the only sunny day
4) Not walking to our hire car to drive to the airport only to find it had been towed away and replaced by a street market, with no signs in sight (Cost or reclaiming our car = €150)

Apart form that, great trip.

Why would a 50 minute delay make you miss a flight? Surely any sensible person aims to get to an airport 2-3 hours before a flight
06-22-2016, 02:10 PM
The Jorge

Quote:

Originally Posted by Luis Anaconda

:-( I had no choice but to get a coach last time I went to Gatwick as the rail line had works on it. It was utter hell. Victoria Coach Station could have been invented by Dante

Yeah, given that's the welcome we give a large percentage of the fugees arriving it's quite a wonder they stay. Mind you, nobody uses coaches voluntarily do they? The hard wearing velour gives me the fear, quite frankly.
06-22-2016, 02:27 PM
Pat Vegas

Quote:

Originally Posted by Monty92

1) Not missing our flight (National Express delayed by 50 minutes. Cost of rebooking on the next flight 6 hours later on the other side of London = £130)
2) Not staying with the least welcoming and convivial Italian mother ever, whose idea of hospitality was giving me a wide berth every time she saw me and slamming a plate full of fried cheese balls in front of me for dinner, two nights in a row
3) Not driving two hours in the wrong direction to the beach, on the only sunny day
4) Not walking to our hire car to drive to the airport only to find it had been towed away and replaced by a street market, with no signs in sight (Cost or reclaiming our car = €150)

Apart form that, great trip.

:hehe: 2 hours the wrong way. Where did you end up Foggia? Unless you were heading North if you had driven a few mins longer you would have found a different beach.
06-22-2016, 02:30 PM
Pat Vegas

Quote:

Originally Posted by Luis Anaconda

Why would a 50 minute delay make you miss a flight? Surely any sensible person aims to get to an airport 2-3 hours before a flight

as my family insisted Toronto rush hour would be a nightmare and I insisted it wouldn't take more than 45 mins to get there. They demanded we got a taxi at 4pm (for a 9.05pm flight)

I said you are all mental.

Well the taxi arrived slightly early and we got there at 4.30pm :-( zzzzz although it was boring I was a smug ****er for the rest of the evening.
06-22-2016, 02:32 PM
Luis Anaconda

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pat Vegas

as my family insisted Toronto rush hour would be a nightmare and I insisted it wouldn't take more than 45 mins to get there. They demanded we got a taxi at 4pm (for a 9.05pm flight)

I said you are all mental.

Well the taxi arrived slightly early and we got there at 4.30pm :-( zzzzz although it was boring I was a smug ****er for the rest of the evening.

:hehe: Airports are great though, p. They have bars and everything
06-22-2016, 02:34 PM
Pat Vegas

Quote:

Originally Posted by Luis Anaconda

:hehe: Airports are great though, p. They have bars and everything

:hehe: The terminal I was in had a these fancy shops too. all the top end designers
'Coming soon'

As most of it was under reconstruction :furious:
06-22-2016, 02:36 PM
Burney

Quote:

Originally Posted by Monty92

1) Not missing our flight (National Express delayed by 50 minutes. Cost of rebooking on the next flight 6 hours later on the other side of London = £130)
2) Not staying with the least welcoming and convivial Italian mother ever, whose idea of hospitality was giving me a wide berth every time she saw me and slamming a plate full of fried cheese balls in front of me for dinner, two nights in a row
3) Not driving two hours in the wrong direction to the beach, on the only sunny day
4) Not walking to our hire car to drive to the airport only to find it had been towed away and replaced by a street market, with no signs in sight (Cost or reclaiming our car = €150)

Apart form that, great trip.

National Express? You mean a coach? Are you ****ing kidding?

What is actually wrong with you, man? :-(
06-22-2016, 02:37 PM
Pat Vegas

Quote:

Originally Posted by Burney

National Express? You mean a coach? Are you ****ing kidding?

What is actually wrong with you, man? :-(

Have you seen his car insurance costs!
06-22-2016, 02:38 PM
PSRB

Quote:

Originally Posted by Luis Anaconda

:hehe: Airports are great though, p. They have bars and everything

Hmmm, they're crap on the homeward leg though and Turin airport is awful
06-22-2016, 02:51 PM
Monty92

Quote:

Originally Posted by Luis Anaconda

Why would a 50 minute delay make you miss a flight? Surely any sensible person aims to get to an airport 2-3 hours before a flight

3 hours before a short-haul? **** that. 1 hour 30 max
06-22-2016, 02:52 PM
Monty92

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pat Vegas

:hehe: 2 hours the wrong way. Where did you end up Foggia? Unless you were heading North if you had driven a few mins longer you would have found a different beach.

I've no idea. My friend who ****ing grew up in Naples was driving. I have no clue how he ****ed up so badly.
06-22-2016, 02:53 PM
Pat Vegas

Quote:

Originally Posted by Monty92

I've no idea. My friend who ****ing grew up in Naples was driving. I have no clue how he ****ed up so badly.

Did he make fun of you for wearing your seatbelt?

They always do to me :-(
06-22-2016, 02:55 PM
SWv2

Why were you staying with an Italian family?
06-22-2016, 02:57 PM
Luis Anaconda

Quote:

Originally Posted by Monty92

3 hours before a short-haul? **** that. 1 hour 30 max

And how did that work out for you?
06-22-2016, 03:04 PM
Pat Vegas

Quote:

Originally Posted by SWv2

Why were you staying with an Italian family?

he's taken this Brexit stuff too seriously.
06-22-2016, 03:13 PM
The Jorge

Quote:

Originally Posted by SWv2

Why were you staying with an Italian family?

For the cheese balls, duh
06-22-2016, 03:16 PM
Sir C

Quote:

Originally Posted by Monty92

1) Not missing our flight (National Express delayed by 50 minutes. Cost of rebooking on the next flight 6 hours later on the other side of London = £130)
2) Not staying with the least welcoming and convivial Italian mother ever, whose idea of hospitality was giving me a wide berth every time she saw me and slamming a plate full of fried cheese balls in front of me for dinner, two nights in a row
3) Not driving two hours in the wrong direction to the beach, on the only sunny day
4) Not walking to our hire car to drive to the airport only to find it had been towed away and replaced by a street market, with no signs in sight (Cost or reclaiming our car = €150)

Apart form that, great trip.

Naples? You went to Naples?

**** me. If you want to experience the third world in all its grubby glory, you have the whole of sub-Saharan Africa from which to choose.

Naples? **** me.
06-22-2016, 03:20 PM
SWv2

1 Attachment(s)

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Jorge

For the cheese balls, duh

These ones?

Attachment 208
06-22-2016, 03:24 PM
Monty92

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sir C

Naples? You went to Naples?

**** me. If you want to experience the third world in all its grubby glory, you have the whole of sub-Saharan Africa from which to choose.

Naples? **** me.

Yeah but where else can you see real life, carbonised, 2,000-year-old corpses still cowering in the actual position in which they burnt to death? :cloud9:

I must say, I was surprised to learn that we actually bombed Pompeii during WW2. That's a bit like punching a down syndromic in the face, just for a laugh, isn't it?
06-22-2016, 03:28 PM
Monty92

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pat Vegas

Did he make fun of you for wearing your seatbelt?

They always do to me :-(

Yes he did! :hehe:
06-22-2016, 03:32 PM
Monty92

Quote:

Originally Posted by SWv2

Why were you staying with an Italian family?

My mate is from there.

I will never do it again.
06-22-2016, 03:45 PM
Ears are alight

Quote:

Originally Posted by Monty92

Yeah but where else can you see real life, carbonised, 2,000-year-old corpses still cowering in the actual position in which they burnt to death? :cloud9:

I must say, I was surprised to learn that we actually bombed Pompeii during WW2. That's a bit like punching a down syndromic in the face, just for a laugh, isn't it?

Clearly one goes to Sorrento, or Ravello. And does a day trip to Pompeii.
06-22-2016, 03:59 PM
SWv2

Quote:

Originally Posted by Monty92

My mate is from there.

I will never do it again.

I genuinely thought you did not have any mates, allied to both you being a monumental bell-end but also your open hatred for fellow man.
06-22-2016, 04:04 PM
The Jorge

Quote:

Originally Posted by SWv2

I genuinely thought you did not have any mates, allied to both you being a monumental bell-end but also your open hatred for fellow man.

Heeeeyyyyy, misanthropes can have friends too. I have several real people who I rub along with fine.

Anyway, with all your "chinning" it's a wonder you have any.
06-22-2016, 04:08 PM
redgunamo

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sir C

Naples? You went to Naples?

**** me. If you want to experience the third world in all its grubby glory, you have the whole of sub-Saharan Africa from which to choose.

Naples? **** me.

Same difference really.
06-22-2016, 04:10 PM
Sir C

Quote:

Originally Posted by redgunamo

Same difference really.

Except Africa's less dangerous. The DRC's a walk in the park compared to Naples.
06-22-2016, 04:14 PM
redgunamo

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sir C

Except Africa's less dangerous. The DRC's a walk in the park compared to Naples.

Fair point.
06-22-2016, 06:04 PM
Ash

Quote:

Originally Posted by Luis Anaconda

:-( I had no choice but to get a coach last time I went to Gatwick as the rail line had works on it. It was utter hell. Victoria Coach Station could have been invented by Dante

Nice Art Deco exterior, though. I used to get a coach to Lyon from there quite often when visiting my ex in St Etienne. A long, long time ago.
06-22-2016, 06:54 PM
The Jorge

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ash

Nice Art Deco exterior, though. I used to get a coach to Lyon from there quite often when visiting my ex in St Etienne. A long, long time ago.

Sarah Cracknell?
06-22-2016, 07:49 PM
Ash

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Jorge

Sarah Cracknell?

I remember her explaining how they got their deal by virtue of the fact that they were friends with the bloke who owned the record company. Summed it all up.
06-22-2016, 09:04 PM
Alberto Balsam Rodriguez

Quote:

Originally Posted by Monty92

1) Not missing our flight (National Express delayed by 50 minutes. Cost of rebooking on the next flight 6 hours later on the other side of London = £130)
2) Not staying with the least welcoming and convivial Italian mother ever, whose idea of hospitality was giving me a wide berth every time she saw me and slamming a plate full of fried cheese balls in front of me for dinner, two nights in a row
3) Not driving two hours in the wrong direction to the beach, on the only sunny day
4) Not walking to our hire car to drive to the airport only to find it had been towed away and replaced by a street market, with no signs in sight (Cost or reclaiming our car = €150)

Apart form that, great trip.

A chance to come on Awimb and do a Monty, priceless!
06-22-2016, 09:42 PM
The Jorge

Quote:

Originally Posted by Alberto Balsam Rodriguez

A chance to come on Awimb and do a Monty, priceless!

Granted, it's no accidentally entering into sexy congress with a HeShe
06-23-2016, 08:13 AM
Luis Anaconda

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ash

Nice Art Deco exterior, though. I used to get a coach to Lyon from there quite often when visiting my ex in St Etienne. A long, long time ago.

Yes - nice building, just ruined inside

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