Reincarnation's alright on tinned pears
:cooper:
Reincarnation's alright on tinned pears
:cooper:
:nod: When people start going on about 'fun', I figuratively release the safety on my Browning. Such people are deeply suspect.Quote:
Originally Posted by Peter
As Dr Johnson put it: 'Nothing is more hopeless than a scheme of merriment'.
With Sir C , I sense that his soul is so tortured, he'll never get a moments peace even after they've switched the machine off and will continue fretting throughout eternity
Oh :cry: Does one not get granite any more?Quote:
Originally Posted by Sir C
Never trust a man who smiles all the time
There's something wrong with them
e.g. Richard Branson
Oh, you don't buy all that 'tortured soul' bit, do you? He only puts that on to look deep and pull the birds.Quote:
Originally Posted by Viva Prat Vegas
Formica and melamine are wonder materials, p. :nod:Quote:
Originally Posted by PSRB
Have you had to actually talk to this tradesman and converse in his own language ?
i.e. "Awright ma'e ? Ow's i' 'angin' ? "
One of the first places I moved into had that, paint it on artex in every room. This was impossible to remove, so I had to have all of the walls re skimmed with plaster.. C*nts !Quote:
Originally Posted by Burney
I've said hello. And at one point he asked about my cider factory. He told me some story about having made beetroot wine and getting 'properly fùcked' on it. :-\Quote:
Originally Posted by Viva Prat Vegas
:hehe:
One presumes your exterior visage was at complete odds with your inner thoughts at that moment
I was trying not to think about him using my lavatory, to be honest. :-(Quote:
Originally Posted by Viva Prat Vegas
"I've Christened the crapper for ya, geez"
Hang on... you've employed Herbert Augustus Chapman in to do the job
He'll be going through the drawers (and your wifes) when your back's turned
Precisely. Fun Has a bland, innocent connotation and implies, to me at least, some degree of organisation.Quote:
Originally Posted by Burney
No such scheme could ever compare to seeing someone fall over, or watching a huge drunken argument unfold over absolutely nothing and admiring the fall out :). It only stops being fun if it turns violent.
:nod: first shít in his new toilet and wánking into his missus's knicker drawer.Quote:
Originally Posted by Viva Prat Vegas
'Fun' is the sort of thing people who organise 'activities' at company parties think they are encouraging.Quote:
Originally Posted by Peter
Enjoyment is what you derive at such events by ignoring these activities and getting riotously drunk instead.
As an introvert, the very thought of having 'organised fun' with other people fills me with absolute dread.Quote:
Originally Posted by Burney
Yes, that is pretty much it. THe maximum level of organisation I will permit isworking out whose round it is. Even a 'whip' is a bit too formal for me.Quote:
Originally Posted by Burney
Anything coming under the umbrella of 'activities' is not my cup of tea. On a stag weekend in Newcastle Iwas railroaded into some sort of go-karting at 9 in the morning. I had got to bed at about 5 in the morning and felt terrible. I wasnt happy. After the'activity' we went to a pub to watch an Arsenal Spurs game (the stag party was about 50/50 split) and the game ended in a huge row between two or three of the party over a refereeing decision. Some awful things were saidand we were all asked to leave the pub.
I was almost collapsed on the floor laughing. Now THAT is fun :)
Bigg Market or Quayside?Quote:
Originally Posted by Peter
I'm guessing the former...
Not really sure. I believe it was on a fairly long road that leads towards Big Market.Quote:
Originally Posted by IUFG
I was never entirely sure where I was. I believe the strip club that I refused to go in was in Big Market.
with no mention of water, it would have been the Bigg Market area.Quote:
Originally Posted by Peter
not a bad night out in either place, although the former is a bit
http://viz.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/...2014_17-27.png
More importantly - did we win?Quote:
Originally Posted by Peter
The man drives a diesel Passat.Quote:
Originally Posted by IUFG
oh dear.Quote:
Originally Posted by Sir C
though that does explain things..
He is a great admirer of it because of the boot space.Quote:
Originally Posted by IUFG
The boot space.
He claims to remain unmoved by the wailing of my Aston at 7,000 rpm.
The man has no soul whatsoever.
is it a [gulp] estate?Quote:
Originally Posted by Sir C
Erm, no, it's a Vantage coupé. :shrug:Quote:
Originally Posted by IUFG
I believe we drew, conceding a late equaliser. I think that may have been the cause of the argument.Quote:
Originally Posted by Luis Anaconda
Your car looks rather nice and it gives you - my friend - pleasure. On those bases, it delights me. Beyond that, I have no feelings about it whatsoever because it is merely a collection of bits of metal and whatnot. :shrug:Quote:
Originally Posted by Sir C
Michelangelo's David is a lump of rock, turned into something emotionally moving by the hand of a genius. A Mozart concerto is a collection of vibrations detected by the earholes but made beautiful by man. You can see where I'm going with this...Quote:
Originally Posted by Burney
Yes. And you don't appreciate Mozart Concertos just as I don't appreciate Aston Martinis. People, it would seem, are different. Not always wrong, but different.Quote:
Originally Posted by Sir C
Peter "I believe we drew, conceding a late equaliser. I think that may have been the cause of the argument."
If it was that game where Richard Wright dived over the ball in the last minute, no wonder you had the hump -
Newcastle in November :freezing:
You don't appreciate cars and therefore, under the current school of thinking for those that I disagree with, are evil.Quote:
Originally Posted by Burney
There, I said it.
Northern girls do tend to dress inversely proportional to the outdoor temperature. Therefore, Newcastle is the home of the chilled-wind stiffened nipple. :eat:Quote:
Originally Posted by Viva Prat Vegas
Who said I don’t appreciate cars? I think they are a marvellous invention and am hugely grateful for their ability to move me from one place to another quickly. Wouldn’t be without them - wd Herr Benz imo.Quote:
Originally Posted by IUFG
By the same token, I think computers are marvellous things with lots of benefits. I’m still not going to start knocking one out over the latest MacBook, though.
Well, admiring a car for its boot space among its collection of metal and other bits is a bit like admiring a woman for her ability to carry the shopping among her carbon, calcium and other watery bits.Quote:
Originally Posted by Burney
Actually I'm mad for a bit of Wolfie :shrug:Quote:
Originally Posted by Burney
No, not that one. It was later than that. Around 07, about that time I think. I seem to remember it finished 2-2Quote:
Originally Posted by Viva Prat Vegas
Nothing wrong with judging a woman for her practical benefits: ability to cook, child-bearing capacity, sauciness, etc. Indeed, these things were once considered far more important than silly, nebulous concepts like 'love'. :shrug:Quote:
Originally Posted by IUFG
http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport1/hi/foot...em/6555249.stmQuote:
Originally Posted by Peter
an all too familiar summary at the bottom...