View Full Version : I'm fully on-board the Martinelli train, but I'm not sure it counts as running
Monty92
01-22-2020, 09:30 AM
half the length of the pitch to score if the only defender in your way falls on his c*nt :-(
Herbert Augustus Chapman
01-22-2020, 09:38 AM
half the length of the pitch to score if the only defender in your way falls on his c*nt :-(
have in the whole of your skinny foppish body, reckons the only reason thon fella fell down was because Marti quite deliberately feigned a poor touch to wrongfoot him - how about that! :-D
Monty92
01-22-2020, 09:41 AM
have in the whole of your skinny foppish body, reckons the only reason thon fella fell down was because Marti quite deliberately feigned a poor touch to wrongfoot him - how about that! :-D
Tony C was joking, you total retard.
Now, any chance you can pen me a ditty about Greta Thunberg's vagina?
Sir C
01-22-2020, 09:47 AM
half the length of the pitch to score if the only defender in your way falls on his c*nt :-(
I was rather impressed with his speed whilst carrying the ball. He looks quite the chunky centre-forward type but moves like a winger.
8 out of 10, would recommend.
Herbert Augustus Chapman
01-22-2020, 09:48 AM
Tony C was joking, you total retard.
Now, any chance you can pen me a ditty about Greta Thunberg's vagina?
He was not joking so YOUre the retard! :cry:
Anway ..to the tune of Rosetta
Dear Greta are you better
are you well well well?
Is your fanny like a kipper
does it smell smell smell?
Herbert Augustus Chapman
01-22-2020, 09:50 AM
I was rather impressed with his speed whilst carrying the ball. He looks quite the chunky centre-forward type but moves like a winger.
8 out of 10, would recommend.
Be interesting to see if he chokes his next five one-on-ones like old PeanutHead used to.
Luis Anaconda
01-22-2020, 09:53 AM
half the length of the pitch to score if the only defender in your way falls on his c*nt :-(
um - he still ran half the length of the pitch, so it does count
Sir C
01-22-2020, 10:03 AM
Be interesting to see if he chokes his next five one-on-ones like old PeanutHead used to.
Mikael Sylvestre?
Herbert Augustus Chapman
01-22-2020, 10:07 AM
Mikael Sylvestre?
Don't get a smart mouth on with me posh boy, I'll kick your butt so hard your arsehole'll fly out your mouth. I mean TH, the CL Final losing, peanut headed, scared to play at Old Trafford, choker
Sir C
01-22-2020, 10:08 AM
Don't get a smart mouth on with me posh boy, I'll kick your butt so hard your arsehole'll fly out your mouth. I mean TH, the CL Final losing, peanut headed, scared to play at Old Trafford, choker
Oh. Did Thierry have a peanut head? Are you sure?
Pat Vegas
01-22-2020, 10:12 AM
half the length of the pitch to score if the only defender in your way falls on his c*nt :-(
I was impressed he couldn’t be caught. Even with the ball he was faster than the ones chasing him.
Also if that was pepe or laca they’d probably have played a pass or missed
Herbert Augustus Chapman
01-22-2020, 10:17 AM
Oh. Did Thierry have a peanut head? Are you sure?
https://d3vlf99qeg6bpx.cloudfront.net/content/uploads/2018/10/08103832/Thierry.Henry_.jpg
Sir C
01-22-2020, 10:21 AM
https://d3vlf99qeg6bpx.cloudfront.net/content/uploads/2018/10/08103832/Thierry.Henry_.jpg
That looks like a globe to me.
Luis Anaconda
01-22-2020, 10:21 AM
https://d3vlf99qeg6bpx.cloudfront.net/content/uploads/2018/10/08103832/Thierry.Henry_.jpg
Have you ever seen a peanut, h?
Tony C
01-22-2020, 10:28 AM
Did anyone time his run?
Looked to be bang on Olympic pace...on grass, with boots and a ball at his feet.
Alberto Balsam Rodriguez
01-22-2020, 10:59 AM
half the length of the pitch to score if the only defender in your way falls on his c*nt :-(
He ran from 18 yard box to 18 yard box. That is probably closer to 3/4 the length of the pitch to score.
Monty92
01-22-2020, 11:09 AM
He ran from 18 yard box to 18 yard box. That is probably closer to 3/4 the length of the pitch to score.
I've scored better goals in my back garden.
Luis Anaconda
01-22-2020, 11:10 AM
I've scored better goals in my back garden.
I've scored better goals in your mum's back garden
Monty92
01-22-2020, 11:18 AM
i've scored better goals in your mum's back garden
More of a brownfield site than a back garden, imo.
I've scored better goals in your mum's back garden
Long rangers or tap-ins, la?
barrybueno
01-22-2020, 11:26 AM
Long rangers or tap-ins, la?
Goalmouth scramble imo
barrybueno
01-22-2020, 11:29 AM
He was not joking so YOUre the retard! :cry:
Anway ..to the tune of Rosetta
Dear Greta are you better
are you well well well?
Is your fanny like a kipper
does it smell smell smell?
Good work H, using 'Rosetta' was genius tbh
Tony C
01-22-2020, 11:29 AM
Ok...so hand timed on my omega / YouTube vid...
From the moment Mustafi’s header starts to dip and Martinelli begins to take off to when he took the shot took between 10 and 11 seconds
He was standing pretty much in line with the penalty spot in one box and released the shot at the edge of the opposing penalty area.
Quite impressive...on grass, with boots, ball at his feet, directional changes and that pause at the halfway line when he thought he’d lost the ball to Kante but then he face planted.
Did he not slow down a bit at the end to compose himself too?
...and that pause at the halfway line when he thought he’d lost the ball to Kante but then he face planted.
Did he not slow down a bit at the end to compose himself too?
You can see why Kante slipped. Excellent bit of feigning a poor touch from the newly-crowned King of Drayton Park.
He did slow down a little. Excellent composure from a yoof.
He'll be gone in a couple of years, of course. And Stan will be able afford a new stable for his ranch :-|
redgunamo
01-22-2020, 11:50 AM
Seems to have a peanut for a brain, at least.
Have you ever seen a peanut, h?
redgunamo
01-22-2020, 11:52 AM
:nod: Crowd scene.
Goalmouth scramble imo
Alberto Balsam Rodriguez
01-22-2020, 12:07 PM
I've scored better goals in your mum's back garden
Was the 6 yard box well covered or worn due to over use?
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