The Shadow Home Secretary and putative holder of one of the great Offices of State

[Burney]

turned up to vote this morning wearing two left shoes.

Good luck, everyone. :-(

https://twitter.com/WireSpy3/status/1205080172707434496

[PSRB]

turned up to vote this morning wearing two left shoes.

Good luck, everyone. :-(

https://twitter.com/WireSpy3/status/1205080172707434496

We're ****ed if they get in

[Tony C]

What if...he has two left feet.

Reptilians confirmed :yikes:

[Rich]

turned up to vote this morning wearing two left shoes.

Good luck, everyone. :-(

https://twitter.com/WireSpy3/status/1205080172707434496

I could almost build a case to defend her were the shoes identical to one another. But they are also completely different designs :-(

Is this actually Dianne Abbot?

[Burney]

I could almost build a case to defend her were the shoes identical to one another. But they are also completely different designs :-(

Is this actually Dianne Abbot?

It is. I'm increasingly convinced she has some sort of degenerative neurological disorder. There's being gaffe-prone and then there's being basically incapable of functioning as an adult human being.

[Monty92]

It is. I'm increasingly convinced she has some sort of degenerative neurological disorder. There's being gaffe-prone and then there's being basically incapable of functioning as an adult human being.

She shakes like Michael J f*cking Fox, too.

[Burney]

She shakes like Michael J f*cking Fox, too.

I prefer the simile 'like a shítting dog', m.

[Monty92]

I prefer the simile 'like a shítting dog', m.

A Hollywood icon struck down by Parkinson's at a relatively young age is inherently funny, though.

[Sir C]

I prefer the simile 'like a shítting dog', m.

It’s no ‘grinning like a ****ing jap’ though, is it?

[Burney]

It’s no ‘grinning like a ****ing jap’ though, is it?

No. That's because that is very possibly the greatest crude simile in history.

[Burney]

A Hollywood icon struck down by Parkinson's at a relatively young age is inherently funny, though.

I always felt a bit sorry for him, tbh. He was never going to have much of a career once he stopped being and looking young, but getting Parkinson's always struck me as a bit of a shítter for the lad.

[Sir C]

No. That's because that is very possibly the greatest crude simile in history.

Cold as a witch’s tit?

[Herbert Augustus Chapman]

A Hollywood icon struck down by Parkinson's at a relatively young age is inherently funny, though.

If I hadn't been reading your unmitigated çuntholery for so long I'd be tempted to think you were playing for a laugh :-)

[Burney]

Cold as a witch’s tit?

I quite like 'Cold as a tart's kiss'; 'Wet as an otter's pocket' and the Australian classic 'Dry as a nun's nasty'

[Herbert Augustus Chapman]

Cold as a witch’s tit?

Face like a bulldog lickin' píss off a nettle ... surely?

[Sir C]

I quite like 'Cold as a tart's kiss'; 'Wet as an otter's pocket' and the Australian classic 'Dry as a nun's nasty'

‘Dry as a nun’s ****’ if you grew up in London.

I always thought, ‘dry as Gandhi’s flip flop’ had a lot going for it as well.

[Sir C]

Face like a bulldog lickin' píss off a nettle ... surely?

‘As mean as a Jew’. Jeremy taught me that one.

[Viva Prat Vegas]

Sir C "Cold as a witch’s tit?"

Flat as a witch's tit !

[Herbert Augustus Chapman]

‘As mean as a Jew’. Jeremy taught me that one.
Face like a jew boy paying a bill .. he taught me that one.

[Sir C]

Sir C "Cold as a witch’s tit?"

Flat as a witch's tit !

Aha! I wonder if I've misremembered or whether there are two versions out there.

[Herbert Augustus Chapman]

Aha! I wonder if I've misremembered or whether there are two versions out there.

Cold where I'm from

[Viva Prat Vegas]

There would appear to be two of them...witch is appropriate

[Sir C]

Cold where I'm from

Two versions then.

I rather like 'flat', actually. I may amend mu usage.

What else do we have for 'cold'? 'As a polar bear's arse', I suppose. Must be something better.

[barrybueno]

A Hollywood icon struck down by Parkinson's at a relatively young age is inherently funny, though.

Oh Monty how could you? :-( Not like he was ever an asshole like some of them... Star of quite easily the greatest ever eighties film :bow:

[Herbert Augustus Chapman]

Two versions then.

I rather like 'flat', actually. I may amend mu usage.

What else do we have for 'cold'? 'As a polar bear's arse', I suppose. Must be something better.

Cold enough to freeze the bollox off a brass monkey - not a simile I know - and long ago was contracted simply to "brass monkey weather"

[barrybueno]

Two versions then.

I rather like 'flat', actually. I may amend mu usage.

What else do we have for 'cold'? 'As a polar bear's arse', I suppose. Must be something better.

I like the 'It's a bit Pearl Harbor out there'

[Sir C]

I like the 'It's a bit Pearl Harbor out there'

Nice one b, nice one.

[IUFG]

I prefer the simile 'like a shítting dog', m.

Another canine won...

"Like a dog eating hot chips"