View Full Version : The Shadow Home Secretary and putative holder of one of the great Offices of State
Burney
12-12-2019, 12:11 PM
turned up to vote this morning wearing two left shoes.
Good luck, everyone. :-(
https://twitter.com/WireSpy3/status/1205080172707434496
turned up to vote this morning wearing two left shoes.
Good luck, everyone. :-(
https://twitter.com/WireSpy3/status/1205080172707434496
We're ****ed if they get in
Tony C
12-12-2019, 12:20 PM
What if...he has two left feet.
Reptilians confirmed :yikes:
turned up to vote this morning wearing two left shoes.
Good luck, everyone. :-(
https://twitter.com/WireSpy3/status/1205080172707434496
I could almost build a case to defend her were the shoes identical to one another. But they are also completely different designs :-(
Is this actually Dianne Abbot?
Burney
12-12-2019, 12:30 PM
I could almost build a case to defend her were the shoes identical to one another. But they are also completely different designs :-(
Is this actually Dianne Abbot?
It is. I'm increasingly convinced she has some sort of degenerative neurological disorder. There's being gaffe-prone and then there's being basically incapable of functioning as an adult human being.
Monty92
12-12-2019, 12:40 PM
It is. I'm increasingly convinced she has some sort of degenerative neurological disorder. There's being gaffe-prone and then there's being basically incapable of functioning as an adult human being.
She shakes like Michael J f*cking Fox, too.
Burney
12-12-2019, 12:41 PM
She shakes like Michael J f*cking Fox, too.
I prefer the simile 'like a shítting dog', m.
Monty92
12-12-2019, 12:47 PM
I prefer the simile 'like a shítting dog', m.
A Hollywood icon struck down by Parkinson's at a relatively young age is inherently funny, though.
Sir C
12-12-2019, 12:51 PM
I prefer the simile 'like a shítting dog', m.
It’s no ‘grinning like a ****ing jap’ though, is it?
Burney
12-12-2019, 12:52 PM
It’s no ‘grinning like a ****ing jap’ though, is it?
No. That's because that is very possibly the greatest crude simile in history.
Burney
12-12-2019, 12:53 PM
A Hollywood icon struck down by Parkinson's at a relatively young age is inherently funny, though.
I always felt a bit sorry for him, tbh. He was never going to have much of a career once he stopped being and looking young, but getting Parkinson's always struck me as a bit of a shítter for the lad.
Sir C
12-12-2019, 12:55 PM
No. That's because that is very possibly the greatest crude simile in history.
Cold as a witch’s tit?
Herbert Augustus Chapman
12-12-2019, 12:56 PM
A Hollywood icon struck down by Parkinson's at a relatively young age is inherently funny, though.
If I hadn't been reading your unmitigated çuntholery for so long I'd be tempted to think you were playing for a laugh :-)
Burney
12-12-2019, 12:56 PM
Cold as a witch’s tit?
I quite like 'Cold as a tart's kiss'; 'Wet as an otter's pocket' and the Australian classic 'Dry as a nun's nasty'
Herbert Augustus Chapman
12-12-2019, 12:57 PM
Cold as a witch’s tit?
Face like a bulldog lickin' píss off a nettle ... surely?
Sir C
12-12-2019, 12:58 PM
I quite like 'Cold as a tart's kiss'; 'Wet as an otter's pocket' and the Australian classic 'Dry as a nun's nasty'
‘Dry as a nun’s ****’ if you grew up in London.
I always thought, ‘dry as Gandhi’s flip flop’ had a lot going for it as well.
Sir C
12-12-2019, 12:59 PM
Face like a bulldog lickin' píss off a nettle ... surely?
‘As mean as a Jew’. Jeremy taught me that one.
Viva Prat Vegas
12-12-2019, 01:06 PM
Sir C "Cold as a witch’s tit?"
Flat as a witch's tit !
Herbert Augustus Chapman
12-12-2019, 01:09 PM
‘As mean as a Jew’. Jeremy taught me that one.
Face like a jew boy paying a bill .. he taught me that one.
Sir C
12-12-2019, 01:12 PM
Sir C "Cold as a witch’s tit?"
Flat as a witch's tit !
Aha! I wonder if I've misremembered or whether there are two versions out there.
Herbert Augustus Chapman
12-12-2019, 01:13 PM
Aha! I wonder if I've misremembered or whether there are two versions out there.
Cold where I'm from
Viva Prat Vegas
12-12-2019, 01:16 PM
There would appear to be two of them...witch is appropriate
Sir C
12-12-2019, 01:17 PM
Cold where I'm from
Two versions then.
I rather like 'flat', actually. I may amend mu usage.
What else do we have for 'cold'? 'As a polar bear's arse', I suppose. Must be something better.
barrybueno
12-12-2019, 01:48 PM
A Hollywood icon struck down by Parkinson's at a relatively young age is inherently funny, though.
Oh Monty how could you? :-( Not like he was ever an asshole like some of them... Star of quite easily the greatest ever eighties film :bow:
Herbert Augustus Chapman
12-12-2019, 02:01 PM
Two versions then.
I rather like 'flat', actually. I may amend mu usage.
What else do we have for 'cold'? 'As a polar bear's arse', I suppose. Must be something better.
Cold enough to freeze the bollox off a brass monkey - not a simile I know - and long ago was contracted simply to "brass monkey weather"
barrybueno
12-12-2019, 02:08 PM
Two versions then.
I rather like 'flat', actually. I may amend mu usage.
What else do we have for 'cold'? 'As a polar bear's arse', I suppose. Must be something better.
I like the 'It's a bit Pearl Harbor out there'
Sir C
12-12-2019, 02:09 PM
I like the 'It's a bit Pearl Harbor out there'
Nice one b, nice one.
I prefer the simile 'like a shítting dog', m.
Another canine won...
"Like a dog eating hot chips"
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