Smith out - wd Jofra

[Luis Anaconda]

:nurse::nurse::nurse:

[Rich]

:nurse::nurse::nurse:

Not sure why he was allowed to go out and bat again, tbh. Was apparently vomiting the day after the Test. He's obviously not in great shape.

[Luis Anaconda]

Not sure why he was allowed to go out and bat again, tbh. Was apparently vomiting the day after the Test. He's obviously not in great shape.

Yeah - I imagine the doctor (and Langer) will have some questions to answer. Clearly wasn't fit to bat

[Rich]

Yeah - I imagine the doctor (and Langer) will have some questions to answer. Clearly wasn't fit to bat

I think there should really be an independent Match Doctor that makes decisions on such things.

[71 Guns - channeling the spirit of Mr Hat]

:nurse::nurse::nurse:

Excellent. I presume Labuschagne is his replacement? He's shít - only averaging 65 this season :hehe:

[Rich]

Excellent. I presume Labuschagne is his replacement? He's shít - only averaging 65 this season :hehe:

He's South African. But I thought it was only England who picked foreigners?

[Luis Anaconda]

Excellent. I presume Labuschagne is his replacement? He's shít - only averaging 65 this season :hehe:

In the second division of the Championship

[71 Guns - channeling the spirit of Mr Hat]

In the second division of the Championship

Pfft. He'll still score a ton in each innings. At least.

[71 Guns - channeling the spirit of Mr Hat]

He's South African. But I thought it was only England who picked foreigners?

We're allowed to pick players from the colonies :thumbup:

[IUFG]

I think there should really be an independent Match Doctor that makes decisions on such things.

Why? Because team doctors cannot be trusted to put the best interests of their patients/players first?

Doctors really are ****s, are they not, r?

[Burney]

:nurse::nurse::nurse:

Fine work pinging the Touretty fúcker imo. MBEs all round.

[Rich]

Why? Because team doctors cannot be trusted to put the best interests of their patients/players first?

Doctors really are ****s, are they not, r?

They reside in the dressing room of the team that employs them. They presumably report to the Head Coach of the relevant team and are therefore exposed to certain pressures that will invariably prevent them from making an unbiased medical decision (even if that's subconscious).

[Burney]

They reside in the dressing room of the team that employs them. They presumably report to the Head Coach of the relevant team and are therefore exposed to certain pressures that will invariably prevent them from making an unbiased medical decision (even if that's subconscious).

I said this about Anderson's fitness test the other week, of course.

[Rich]

I said this about Anderson's fitness test the other week, of course.

If he's fit for Old Trafford, who do you drop to bring him in?

Woakes (this loses you a relatively strong batsman).
Archer (obviously no)
Broad (been our most effective bowler in terms of wickets so far)
Leach (you would be reliant on Root to be your spinner).

My vote would be to bring him in for Woakes & bring Liam Dawson in to replace leach (and the batting lost in dropping Woakes).

[Burney]

If he's fit for Old Trafford, who do you drop to bring him in?

Woakes (this loses you a relatively strong batsman).
Archer (obviously no)
Broad (been our most effective bowler in terms of wickets so far)
Leach (you would be reliant on Root to be your spinner).

My vote would be to bring him in for Woakes & bring Liam Dawson in to replace leach (and the batting lost in dropping Woakes).

I wouldn't bring him in. We can't risk it. We have Australia at a disadvantage, so risking only having ten players ourselves would be retarded.

As far as I'm concerned, Anderson is finnish.

[Rich]

I wouldn't bring him in. We can't risk it. We have Australia at a disadvantage, so risking only having ten players ourselves would be retarded.

As far as I'm concerned, Anderson is finnish.

:-( How dare you! Please consider the prospect of Archer bullying Aussies at one end with Anderson tying them in knots (and preventing them scoring at the other). He also bowls very well at Old Trafford, IIRC.

[Burney]

:-( How dare you! Please consider the prospect of Archer bullying Aussies at one end with Anderson tying them in knots (and preventing them scoring at the other). He also bowls very well at Old Trafford, IIRC.

No, I'm sorry. He's shown he can't be trusted to assess his own fitness and he's ninety-fúck years old. Time to move on.

[Luis Anaconda]

Pfft. He'll still score a ton in each innings. At least.

:hehe: Just been hit on the head again in the nets by Mitchell Starc

[Luis Anaconda]

If he's fit for Old Trafford, who do you drop to bring him in?

Woakes (this loses you a relatively strong batsman).
Archer (obviously no)
Broad (been our most effective bowler in terms of wickets so far)
Leach (you would be reliant on Root to be your spinner).

My vote would be to bring him in for Woakes & bring Liam Dawson in to replace leach (and the batting lost in dropping Woakes).

Depends on the workloads for the bowlers - Woakes has been underused imo but Broad will bowl a lot in back to back Tests. Would be harsh to leave him out though

[Ganpati's Goonerz--AFC's Aboriginal Fertility Cult]

Depends on the workloads for the bowlers - Woakes has been underused imo but Broad will bowl a lot in back to back Tests. Would be harsh to leave him out though

Ironically, despite Stokes saying he wouldn't bat above 6 (and I swear on Ganpati that the article did exist), he bats at 5 and scores a ton. Might as well open with Leach. He couldn't do any worse than Roy and that would make space for the fifth seamer. I'd like to see Leach as a night-watchman. Perhaps he saves his batting for tests? Thought it was silly for YJB to slog himself out in the first innings when Leach was still there on six.

Maybe not being a slogger, and therefore unlikely to get an IPL contract, he's an old fashioned no.11 spinner who just works in the nets on just playing the forward defensive and the leave. I miss those.

Pity we can't fit young Sam Curran in. Denly?

Burns
Leach
S Curran
Root
Stokes.
YJB
Other JB
Woakes
Archer
Broad
Jimmy.

[Ash]

Ironically, despite Stokes saying he wouldn't bat above 6 (and I swear on Ganpati that the article did exist), he bats at 5 and scores a ton. Might as well open with Leach. He couldn't do any worse than Roy and that would make space for the fifth seamer. I'd like to see Leach as a night-watchman. Perhaps he saves his batting for tests? Thought it was silly for YJB to slog himself out in the first innings when Leach was still there on six.

Maybe not being a slogger, and therefore unlikely to get an IPL contract, he's an old fashioned no.11 spinner who just works in the nets on just playing the forward defensive and the leave. I miss those.

Pity we can't fit young Sam Curran in. Denly?

Burns
Leach
S Curran
Root
Stokes.
YJB
Other JB
Woakes
Archer
Broad
Jimmy.

Do you ever do terse?

No offense, like, but I don't read your posts any more. Sorry.

[Luis Anaconda]

Ironically, despite Stokes saying he wouldn't bat above 6 (and I swear on Ganpati that the article did exist), he bats at 5 and scores a ton. Might as well open with Leach. He couldn't do any worse than Roy and that would make space for the fifth seamer. I'd like to see Leach as a night-watchman. Perhaps he saves his batting for tests? Thought it was silly for YJB to slog himself out in the first innings when Leach was still there on six.

Maybe not being a slogger, and therefore unlikely to get an IPL contract, he's an old fashioned no.11 spinner who just works in the nets on just playing the forward defensive and the leave. I miss those.

Pity we can't fit young Sam Curran in. Denly?

Burns
Leach
S Curran
Root
Stokes.
YJB
Other JB
Woakes
Archer
Broad
Jimmy.

Yeah - I hadn't noticed Stokes had come in above Buttler on Saturday (it was a long day) but definitely the right decision. I think 5 is probably as high as he should bat. Agree about the Bairstow shot in the first innings but there was also a feeling we wanted to bowl at them as quickly as possible in those conditions. Batted well in the second innings as well and Headingley to come ... Curran for Denly was mooted before the last Test - might happen. We need to win and I struggle to see Denly getting big runs

[Burney]

Yeah - I hadn't noticed Stokes had come in above Buttler on Saturday (it was a long day) but definitely the right decision. I think 5 is probably as high as he should bat. Agree about the Bairstow shot in the first innings but there was also a feeling we wanted to bowl at them as quickly as possible in those conditions. Batted well in the second innings as well and Headingley to come ... Curran for Denly was mooted before the last Test - might happen. We need to win and I struggle to see Denly getting big runs

As someone said the other day, Denly is just Vince, but older.

[Luis Anaconda]

As someone said the other day, Denly is just Vince, but older.

:nod: Better fielder though - some catch the other day

[Burney]

:nod: Better fielder though - some catch the other day

True. That plus his regulation nicely-made 20 followed by an unforced error still isn't enough to keep him in the side, though.

[Luis Anaconda]

True. That plus his regulation nicely-made 20 followed by an unforced error still isn't enough to keep him in the side, though.

Not at all. Just looking at the current round of county scores - not many batsmen jumping out though

[Just Trent]

:hehe: Just been hit on the head again in the nets by Mitchell Starc

I did chuckle when he got hit first ball on Sunday. No sooner had the commentator finished saying ‘concussion substitute’, and down he went. :hehe:

[Burney]

Not at all. Just looking at the current round of county scores - not many batsmen jumping out though

I think we ought to get the most promising youngsters in and train them to test cricket before they develop the terrible habits of seasoned county pros. Nothing about our game annoys me more than us finally discovering a decent bat and then realising he's already 28 and will have six years tops playing tests.

[Luis Anaconda]

I think we ought to get the most promising youngsters in and train them to test cricket before they develop the terrible habits of seasoned county pros. Nothing about our game annoys me more than us finally discovering a decent bat and then realising he's already 28 and will have six years tops playing tests.

haha- yes. We should get Sibley in for one thing. Only 23 (but just got 0 and 9 in his latest match). Pope possibly when he is fit and Crawley at Kent (but again the whole team was bowled out for 40 today ffs)

[Rich]

Do you ever do terse?

No offense, like, but I don't read your posts any more. Sorry.

Is he suggesting we bat S Curran at 3? :-\

[Burney]

Is he suggesting we bat S Curran at 3? :-\

He's also suggesting we open with Leach, ffs. The Curran thing is only his second most barkingly mad suggestion.

[Ganpati's Goonerz--AFC's Aboriginal Fertility Cult]

He's also suggesting we open with Leach, ffs. The Curran thing is only his second most barkingly mad suggestion.

It's on the grounds that if both Leach and Curran get ducks batting at 2 and 3, they'll probably only score ten less runs combined than Roy and Denly would have done, yet both of them can bowl.

Basically, those ten runs are neither here nor there if they can face as many balls. It's no more barking mad than Boycs saying his nan could have done better than Roy with a stick of rhubarb. I just reckon Curran and Leach offer a bit more in the bowling dept than Boycott's dead nan.

Our lack of a top 3 is down to the IPL and associated T20 leagues and, as such, is our bad karma for the Amritsar massacre and the 1877-8 famine.

Still, I reckon young Jofra looks like the Goddess Kali to the Convicts so that must be our good karma for being the first country to say no fellow human being can be enslaved.

So it's swings and roundabouts on the imperial theology front.

[Luis Anaconda]

It's on the grounds that if both Leach and Curran get ducks batting at 2 and 3, they'll probably only score ten less runs combined than Roy and Denly would have done, yet both of them can bowl.

Basically, those ten runs are neither here nor there if they can face as many balls. It's no more barking mad than Boycs saying his nan could have done better than Roy with a stick of rhubarb. I just reckon Curran and Leach offer a bit more in the bowling dept than Boycott's dead nan.

Our lack of a top 3 is down to the IPL and associated T20 leagues and, as such, is our bad karma for the Amritsar massacre and the 1877-8 famine.

Still, I reckon young Jofra looks like the Goddess Kali to the Convicts so that must be our good karma for being the first country to say no fellow human being can be enslaved.

So it's swings and roundabouts on the imperial theology front.

I do hope you went for a lie-down after writing this rubbish

[barrybueno]

I'm hungover and confused enough as it is but that has really fúcked me up :hehe:

[Ganpati's Goonerz--AFC's Aboriginal Fertility Cult]

I do hope you went for a lie-down after writing this rubbish

Don't be silly. I went and got another can of Spesh.