Oi Bignose!

[Sir C]

My local barbecue shop has this great offer on. A proper bargain. https://www.bbq-barn.co.uk/product/KJBUNDLE-Kamado-Joe-Classic-in-Cart-Get-You-Going-Bundle-Package-Deal.php

[Maravilloso Marvo]

I was knifed outside that shop back in 1997. I mean it wasn't there then, but along that big of pavement, opposite the old Iron Horse as it used to be. I went into the chinese takeaway just there for some tissues whilst someone called the police and my mates ordered some chicken balls with gloop...

[Sir C]

I was knifed outside that shop back in 1997. I mean it wasn't there then, but along that big of pavement, opposite the old Iron Horse as it used to be. I went into the chinese takeaway just there for some tissues whilst someone called the police and my mates ordered some chicken balls with gloop...

Remember Lamorbey Baths down there?

I never went.

[Maravilloso Marvo]

Remember Lamorbey Baths down there?

I never went.

Well yeah I went to school just there (Chis & Sid), so know it all very well. Lamorbey is still very much there, well they rebuilt it as a full leisure centre where the golf club house was just opposite on Hurst Road so backing onto the school playing fields of Chis & Sid. I take our kids there now and again to try and build up their immune systems by exposing them to all sorts.

May favourite of that bit now is the big Mexican restaurant next door or so to the bbq shop. It carries the slogan of "Don't siesta, let's Fiesta!" across their signage. Always make me chuckle for some reason.

[Sir C]

Well yeah I went to school just there (Chis & Sid), so know it all very well. Lamorbey is still very much there, well they rebuilt it as a full leisure centre where the golf club house was just opposite on Hurst Road so backing onto the school playing fields of Chis & Sid. I take our kids there now and again to try and build up their immune systems by exposing them to all sorts.

May favourite of that bit now is the big Mexican restaurant next door or so to the bbq shop. It carries the slogan of "Don't siesta, let's Fiesta!" across their signage. Always make me chuckle for some reason.

I'm excited by the new Sri Lankan that's been touted. The Elephant, I believe. Opposite the station?

[Maravilloso Marvo]

Oh I'm not sure about that. I live in Bickley these days so not up on local news in Sidcup anymore. My dad was a big fan of the Italian on the corner at the traffic lights so diagonally opposite the little Tesco. Although he got annoyed when they changed the bruschetta recipe so hasn't been back since.

[Sir C]

Oh I'm not sure about that. I live in Bickley these days so not up on local news in Sidcup anymore. My dad was a big fan of the Italian on the corner at the traffic lights so diagonally opposite the little Tesco. Although he got annoyed when they changed the bruschetta recipe so hasn't been back since.

Do you eat at Tamasha? Best Indian around these parts by a margin, I reckon. Plus, Kenny Sansom used to live upstairs.

[Maravilloso Marvo]

Do you eat at Tamasha? Best Indian around these parts by a margin, I reckon. Plus, Kenny Sansom used to live upstairs.

I prefer Indian Essence in Petts Wood, Atul Kochhar's place. They do a great tasting menu for £30pp on a Monday which is really great value, if you can get past having a curry on a Monday night.

[AFC East]

My local barbecue shop has this great offer on. A proper bargain. https://www.bbq-barn.co.uk/product/KJBUNDLE-Kamado-Joe-Classic-in-Cart-Get-You-Going-Bundle-Package-Deal.php

Pardon my ignorance, but what makes it worth a g?

[Ash]

I live in Bickley these days

What happened to Putney?

[Ganpati's Goonerz--AFC's Aboriginal Fertility Cult]

Do you eat at Tamasha? Best Indian around these parts by a margin, I reckon. Plus, Kenny Sansom used to live upstairs.

I thought our League Cup winning left back was last seen living in a park surrounded by empty wine bottles.

I really wish the club would sort it out. We can afford to pay current players 350k a week, but we can't afford £200 to rent a former skipper a one bed in Hackney. Disgrace.

[Sir C]

I thought our League Cup winning left back was last seen living in a park surrounded by empty wine bottles.

I really wish the club would sort it out. We can afford to pay current players 350k a week, but we can't afford £200 to rent a former skipper a one bed in Hackney. Disgrace.

The real tragedy there of course was that he was drinking Mateus Rosé.

[Sir C]

Pardon my ignorance, but what makes it worth a g?

It's just sort of... good. You know. Imagine you've been using a Weber Kettle for years. It's a fine barbecue. It's the Alan Smith of barbecues. One day you get to play with a Kamado Joe, and you realise you're cooking with Dennis Bergkamp. That's the difference.

[Ash]

I thought our League Cup winning left back was last seen living in a park surrounded by empty wine bottles.

I really wish the club would sort it out. We can afford to pay current players 350k a week, but we can't afford £200 to rent a former skipper a one bed in Hackney. Disgrace.

ISTR that the club have helped him out on occasions, and £200 won't go far, even in Hackney.

[Sir C]

I prefer Indian Essence in Petts Wood, Atul Kochhar's place. They do a great tasting menu for £30pp on a Monday which is really great value, if you can get past having a curry on a Monday night.

Oh yes, I keep meaning to try that and I keep forgetting.

[Luis Anaconda]

ISTR that the club have helped him out on occasions, and £200 won't go far, even in Hackney.

They did - he was employed by the club as one of the legends tour hosts for a while, for a start. He now works for Crystal Palace and does media work - he doesn't live in a park surrounded by wine bottles (NTTAWWT). Aside from that the CLUB ARE A DISGRACE

[PSRB]

It's just sort of... good. You know. Imagine you've been using a Weber Kettle for years. It's a fine barbecue. It's the Alan Smith of barbecues. One day you get to play with a Kamado Joe, and you realise you're cooking with Dennis Bergkamp. That's the difference.

I think the glw would lose the plot if spent that on a BBQ, am very tempted though. Cheaper than the green egg.

[Ganpati's Goonerz--AFC's Aboriginal Fertility Cult]

The real tragedy there of course was that he was drinking Mateus Rosé.

God, I'd forgotten that bit. Must have blanked it out. I didn't even know they still make the stuff.

As you can imagine, I frequented some really run-down offies in search of my Spesh, but I'm sure I haven't seen a bottle of Mateus Rose since the '80s. They all have vile Californian pîss, but none have stooped as low as MR.

[Sir C]

God, I'd forgotten that bit. Must have blanked it out. I didn't even know they still make the stuff.

As you can imagine, I frequented some really run-down offies in search of my Spesh, but I'm sure I haven't seen a bottle of Mateus Rose since the '80s. They all have vile Californian pîss, but none have stooped as low as MR.

I recently went for an Indian meal with a couple who were keen to show us their local.. as the poppadams were being served, amid a great shoulder of winking and grinning, the waiter proudly displayed the bottle. "Your special wine as usual madam!" She was positively squealing with delight.

Yes, it was Mateus Rosé.

I drank it. Fúck it, I have no pride.

[AFC East]

I recently went for an Indian meal with a couple who were keen to show us their local.. as the poppadams were being served, amid a great shoulder of winking and grinning, the waiter proudly displayed the bottle. "Your special wine as usual madam!" She was positively squealing with delight.

Yes, it was Mateus Rosé.

I drank it. Fúck it, I have no pride.

When you say recently, did you mean 42 years ago?

p.s. a Dennis Bergkamp of grills? It could turn a Greggs sausage roll into a 3* plate of food.

[Sir C]

When you say recently, did you mean 42 years ago?

p.s. a Dennis Bergkamp of grills? It could turn a Greggs sausage roll into a 3* plate of food.

Actually it was about 5 years ago, come to think of it.

My summer weekends are spent mainly nursing huge lumps of pig which I cook with smoke for many hours. sometimes I rise at 4 a.m. to get the pig on to be ready for dinner at 8 p.m. :cloud9:

[Sir C]

I think the glw would lose the plot if spent that on a BBQ, am very tempted though. Cheaper than the green egg.

Blow out thon Thermomix nonsense and get yourself a Kamado Joe, man.

[PSRB]

I have spent the last hour looking at them and similar ones :rubchin:

[Maravilloso Marvo]

What happened to Putney?

Moved back over closer to my parents when we had the kids and to be able to buy an actual house with an actual garden rather than a shoebox in Putney.

[Luis Anaconda]

What happened to Putney?

South Africans took it over from my last recollections of it

[AFC East]

Actually it was about 5 years ago, come to think of it.

My summer weekends are spent mainly nursing huge lumps of pig which I cook with smoke for many hours. sometimes I rise at 4 a.m. to get the pig on to be ready for dinner at 8 p.m. :cloud9:

I salute you. Far beyond my tolerance for cooking, but not eating.

I assume you visit the Southern States and enjoy the rather delicious treatment of meat.

[Pokster]

Actually it was about 5 years ago, come to think of it.

My summer weekends are spent mainly nursing huge lumps of pig which I cook with smoke for many hours. sometimes I rise at 4 a.m. to get the pig on to be ready for dinner at 8 p.m. :cloud9:

You only rise then as you need a p1ss imho

[Burney]

Do you eat at Tamasha? Best Indian around these parts by a margin, I reckon. Plus, Kenny Sansom used to live upstairs.

Do they still have the porny bogs?

[Burney]

Oh yes, I keep meaning to try that and I keep forgetting.

Is that ridiculously good sushi place still there?

[Sir C]

Do they still have the porny bogs?

They did when I was last there, although that was probably 4 or 5 years ago now.

There's a new chinee in Orpington just round the corner from your old house. I think it was a chinee before. Noodle House or something? Now it'sd called Parkside and it serves the best chinese food I've had outside the west end. Better than Xian.

That information is of precisely no use to you whatsoever, is it? :hehe:

[Sir C]

I salute you. Far beyond my tolerance for cooking, but not eating.

I assume you visit the Southern States and enjoy the rather delicious treatment of meat.

In 2004 I made a solemn vow never to enter the USA ever again.

I have remained true to my word.

[Sir C]

Is that ridiculously good sushi place still there?

Yes. But sushi is a lunchtime dish and they only do take away at lunchtime. So fúck them.

[barrybueno]

It's just sort of... good. You know. Imagine you've been using a Weber Kettle for years. It's a fine barbecue. It's the Alan Smith of barbecues. One day you get to play with a Kamado Joe, and you realise you're cooking with Dennis Bergkamp. That's the difference.

Trouble with a Komodo is that people buy them when they're small and cute without realising they can grow to 9ft. And they are not children friendly!

[Sir C]

You only rise then as you need a p1ss imho

I get up at about 5:30 every day for a píss, and I'm wide awake so I don't go back to bed. I've finished my run, showered, dressed and breakfasted by 6:30. Then I sit around scratching my arse until 9.

It's all fúcked up.

[Burney]

They did when I was last there, although that was probably 4 or 5 years ago now.

There's a new chinee in Orpington just round the corner from your old house. I think it was a chinee before. Noodle House or something? Now it'sd called Parkside and it serves the best chinese food I've had outside the west end. Better than Xian.

That information is of precisely no use to you whatsoever, is it? :hehe:

Not really, no. :-(

I found another restaurant with hardcore pornography in the lavatories, actually. It's called Sorastro's in Covent Garden. It's not terribly good, but it does have filth in the bogs.

[Burney]

I get up at about 5:30 every day for a píss, and I'm wide awake so I don't go back to bed. I've finished my run, showered, dressed and breakfasted by 6:30. Then I sit around scratching my arse until 9.

It's all fúcked up.

My bowels tend to be what wake me up rather than my bladder.

[Ash]

Moved back over closer to my parents when we had the kids and to be able to buy an actual house with an actual garden rather than a shoebox in Putney.

I had my second-most-expensive-breakfast-in-London in Putney a few years ago. Only Knightsbridge was more. I bet you miss all the braying hoorays mucking about in boats.

[Sir C]

My bowels tend to be what wake me up rather than my bladder.

It is important to start the day with a good emptier, in my opinion. Sets one up nicely.

[Viva Prat Vegas]

"Toilets decorated with pornography; owner rude

"....While we waited for him, we noticed on the wall in the main restaurant a drawing of a rape scene! He tried to laugh it off saying many people got the wrong impression about that picture and it was actually two wrestlers "

[Maravilloso Marvo]

I had my second-most-expensive-breakfast-in-London in Putney a few years ago. Only Knightsbridge was more. I bet you miss all the braying hoorays mucking about in boats.

I felt quite relaxed comfortable and at home there. I mean I dreaded anybody asking anything remotely touching on the heritage of my blood line, but apart from that, I felt like I was one of them for the most part.

[WES]

In 2004 I made a solemn vow never to enter the USA ever again.

I have remained true to my word.

Out of interest, what did the rebels do to you in 2004 that brought this on, Charles?

[Sir C]

Out of interest, what did the rebels do to you in 2004 that brought this on, Charles?

They just broke me with Americanness. It was always going to happen eventually.

I flew into Miami on a business trip. Queued for Christ knows how long to be grunted up by a pig in uniform at immigration. Stayed at The Shore Club and drank at Delanos. Vacuous morons all around me. Ate some deeply offensive rubbish. Most things flavoured mainly with sugar. Fúcked off to Costa Rica for a holiday. Beautiful country, full of ignorant vacuous Yanks. Had to fly home via Miami. Going through Miami airport in transit? You still get to enjoy the 4 hour passport queue and be treated like an enemy of the state.

****s.

[Burney]

"Toilets decorated with pornography; owner rude

"....While we waited for him, we noticed on the wall in the main restaurant a drawing of a rape scene! He tried to laugh it off saying many people got the wrong impression about that picture and it was actually two wrestlers "

Don't remember that. And besides, how can you tell it's rape from a still image?

Anyway, this one's above the urinals.

1069

[Burney]

They just broke me with Americanness. It was always going to happen eventually.

I flew into Miami on a business trip. Queued for Christ knows how long to be grunted up by a pig in uniform at immigration. Stayed at The Shore Club and drank at Delanos. Vacuous morons all around me. Ate some deeply offensive rubbish. Most things flavoured mainly with sugar. Fúcked off to Costa Rica for a holiday. Beautiful country, full of ignorant vacuous Yanks. Had to fly home via Miami. Going through Miami airport in transit? You still get to enjoy the 4 hour passport queue and be treated like an enemy of the state.

****s.

I have to say, the almost entirely automated process at Dallas Fort Worth worked very well and I was through it in ten minutes. The only interaction was with a very polite, but flustered homosexual in a wig who showed you how to use the machines (he reminded me of the hotel receptionist in Spinal Tap - 'I'm just as god made me, sir!' :hehe: )

Mind you, I still had to go to the desk of some immigration neanderthal who gestured at me without speaking a word (despite the fact I'd made it clear I spoke better English than him) before letting me in.

Cùnts.