Fúcking hell.

[Sir C]

I've just got some air through my right nostril for the first time since about 1979.

These 'roids are the tits.

[WES]

I've just got some air through my right nostril for the first time since about 1979.

These 'roids are the tits.

This inability to smell - and therefore taste - explains many of your views on food, Dutchie.

You're about to have a whole new world opened up to you. :thumbup:

[Sir C]

This inability to smell - and therefore taste - explains many of your views on food, Dutchie.

You're about to have a whole new world opened up to you. :thumbup:

You've got to get some help. It's like someone emptied out all the humanity and replaced it with bile.

You're going to die, cold, alone and even more bitter.

Get some therapy. Save yourself.

[WES]

You've got to get some help. It's like someone emptied out all the humanity and replaced it with bile.

You're going to die, cold, alone and even more bitter.

Get some therapy. Save yourself.

That's so hurtful. :-(

And there I was filled with optimism and happiness for you and your newfound sensory ability and euphoric for how much pleasure you will receive in the few remaining years you have left.

I think an apology is in order. :nod:

[Herbert Augustus Chapman]

That's so hurtful. :-(

And there I was filled with optimism and happiness for you and your newfound sensory ability and euphoric for how much pleasure you will receive in the few remaining years you have left.

I think an apology is in order. :nod:

marching powder up there wes. Waste of NHS resources; like giving an incorrigible alcoholic a new liver.

[Viva Prat Vegas]

Congratulation !

Now you can go on the Shopping Channel and fully endorse Nasal Douches

[Burney]

Congratulation !

Now you can go on the Shopping Channel and fully endorse Nasal Douches

A nasal douche, you say?

1035

[Sir C]

A nasal douche, you say?

1035

I woke up at 3 a.m. this morning with my mouth closed, breathing through my nose perfectly naturally like any normal human being.

It's impossible to overstate the importance of this change in my living conditions.

[Burney]

I woke up at 3 a.m. this morning with my mouth closed, breathing through my nose perfectly naturally like any normal human being.

It's impossible to overstate the importance of this change in my living conditions.

I'm delighted for you - and more importantly for your long-suffering wife.

Any side-effects from the roids yet? Are your testiculars shrinking? Are you growing bitch-tits?

[Viva Prat Vegas]

How many pillows are beneath your head during your slumber period ?
I have just the one but might upgrade to two to give my head a more inclined angle and thus aid the passageways at night
:Fash:

[Sir C]

I'm delighted for you - and more importantly for your long-suffering wife.

Any side-effects from the roids yet? Are your testiculars shrinking? Are you growing bitch-tits?

I haven't noticed anything, other than restless leg syndrome whilst watching TV in the evening. My nipples keep itching, could that be connected?

[Sir C]

How many pillows are beneath your head during your slumber period ?
I have just the one but might upgrade to two to give my head a more inclined angle and thus aid the passageways at night
:Fash:

Two pillows under the head plus an additional one for cuddling. Yes, I said a cuddling pillow, what of it?

[Viva Prat Vegas]

Admit it
You wear striped pyjamas too
I see you as a cross between the boy from The Snowman and Private Pike

[Sir C]

Admit it
You wear striped pyjamas too
I see you as a cross between the boy from The Snowman and Private Pike

I always take my jimjams off beofre getting into bed.

[Burney]

I haven't noticed anything, other than restless leg syndrome whilst watching TV in the evening. My nipples keep itching, could that be connected?

I reckon the nipples are a precursor to swelling and - eventually - the development of a nice pair of 36Bs.

[Sir C]

I reckon the nipples are a precursor to swelling and - eventually - the development of a nice pair of 36Bs.

Nice. No need to ever leave the house again.

[Burney]

Nice. No need to ever leave the house again.

Here's a question: would you shave your chest if you grew tits?

[Sir C]

Here's a question: would you shave your chest if you grew tits?

Now that really is a question and, if I'm honest, it's one that's making me feel slightly squeamish. Would you mind if we changed the subject?

[Burney]

Now that really is a question and, if I'm honest, it's one that's making me feel slightly squeamish. Would you mind if we changed the subject?

:-( Never had you down as a transphobe. I am disappoint.

[Sir C]

:-( Never had you down as a transphobe. I am disappoint.

Like fúck you didn't.

[Burney]

Like fúck you didn't.

I was discussing this with my dad the other day. He was genuinely shocked when I pointed out that, were a chap who works for me to rock up one day in a frock, I would be taking my career in my hands and opening the company up to umpteen lawsuits if I even dared to mention the fact - let alone object.

At the same time, however, if he turned up in jeans, I'd be entirely within my rights to send him home.

The world's gone totally fùcking insane. :shrug:

[Herbert Augustus Chapman]

Now that really is a question and, if I'm honest, it's one that's making me feel slightly squeamish. Would you mind if we changed the subject?

Okay .. will you shave your newly developed man-fanny?

[Monty92]

I was discussing this with my dad the other day. He was genuinely shocked when I pointed out that, were a chap who works for me to rock up one day in a frock, I would be taking my career in my hands and opening the company up to umpteen lawsuits if I even dared to mention the fact - let alone object.

At the same time, however, if he turned up in jeans, I'd be entirely within my rights to send him home.

The world's gone totally fùcking insane. :shrug:

That's because employers aren't allowed to discriminate against protected groups and people who wear jeans aren't a protected group.

For the same reason, you couldn't send home a Jew who turns up to work in a yarmulke, even if you have a company policy about no headwear in the office (or in Charlie's case, no Jews in the office)

[Sir C]

Okay .. will you shave your newly developed man-fanny?

No, I like a nice hairy man-fanny, like your mum's.

[Burney]

That's because employers aren't allowed to discriminate against protected groups and people who wear jeans aren't a protected group.

For the same reason, you couldn't send home a Jew who turns up to work in a yarmulke, even if you have a company policy about no headwear in the office (or in Charlie's case, no Jews in the office)

Does the idea of 'protected groups' not strike you as both arbitrary and sinister, though?

And my reason for sending someone home who turned up in a dress would be exactly the same as that for sending home someone whom I deemed to be scruffily dressed - the potentially negative impact of their appearance on the professionalism and reputation of the company. To my mind, it would be wildly unprofessional for someone to turn up unexpectedly in a dress without having first discussed it with their employers.

[Sir C]

Does the idea of 'protected groups' not strike you as both arbitrary and sinister, though?

And my reason for sending someone home who turned up in a dress would be exactly the same as that for sending home someone whom I deemed to be scruffily dressed - the potentially negative impact of their appearance on the professionalism and reputation of the company. To my mind, it would be wildly unprofessional for someone to turn up unexpectedly in a dress without having first discussed it with their employers.

But also they’d look like a raging puff.

[Burney]

But also they’d look like a raging puff.

We've our fair share of those and they're fine. They all dress properly, though. To look at them, you wouldn't know they weren't proper men.

[Monty92]

Oh hang on, you’d send a chick home who turned up in a dress too? That’s fine.


Does the idea of 'protected groups' not strike you as both arbitrary and sinister, though?

And my reason for sending someone home who turned up in a dress would be exactly the same as that for sending home someone whom I deemed to be scruffily dressed - the potentially negative impact of their appearance on the professionalism and reputation of the company. To my mind, it would be wildly unprofessional for someone to turn up unexpectedly in a dress without having first discussed it with their employers.

[Burney]

Oh hang on, you’d send a chick home who turned up in a dress too? That’s fine.

Of course not. As a society, we have come to accept that certain dress codes for men and women are acceptable in the workplace. It is wildly inconsistent and unfair to enforce one dress code, but not another. The upshot of this is that all dress codes become impossible to enforce. Thus, all standards slip and everything goes to shìt.

Oh, hang on. We're already there. :-(