I need to sell my house and it is pretty ****ing ****

[Peter]

Any tips? :)

[Luis Anaconda]

Any tips? :)

I'd probably word the advert a bit differently, p. Honesty is good but that may be a bit too far

[Peter]

I'd probably word the advert a bit differently, p. Honesty is good but that may be a bit too far

I dont want to waste people's time :)

I suppose I could tidy up a bit. THat might help.

[Viva Prat Vegas]

Festoon the bathroom with fresh towels

Heat up some cinnamon on the stove to give the property a baked bread aroma

[WES]

I'd probably word the advert a bit differently, p. Honesty is good but that may be a bit too far

How about 'Sh1t house owned by a failed hippy now for sale. The house is almost as sh1t as the price I'm asking for it. What more do you want?'.

[IUFG]

I dont want to waste people's time :)

I suppose I could tidy up a bit. THat might help.

".....with scope for improvement." are the words you want, p.

I'll email you my invoice.

[Ash]

Any tips? :)

Have you tried papering over the cracks?

Worked for Arsene for years. :cooper:

[Peter]

Have you tried papering over the cracks?

Worked for Arsene for years. :cooper:

I did, literally, try that with one of the internal doors. The results were no more impressive than Arsene's :(

Nobody in their right mind is going to buy this ****hole.

[Peter]

How about 'Sh1t house owned by a failed hippy now for sale. The house is almost as sh1t as the price I'm asking for it. What more do you want?'.

I am not a failed hippy. Over the years I have proved rather good at being a hippy.

[WES]

I am not a failed hippy. Over the years I have proved rather good at being a hippy.

I didn't think hippies were supposed to own houses of any sort. Nor a Rover for that matter. The cat is fine, I suppose. :rubchin:

[Peter]

I didn't think hippies were supposed to own houses of any sort. Nor a Rover for that matter. The cat is fine, I suppose. :rubchin:

I'm a modern hippy. I have a job and stuff.

[Ash]

I did, literally, try that with one of the internal doors. The results were no more impressive than Arsene's :(

Nobody in their right mind is going to buy this ****hole.

You might have to lower the price a bit then. Have you tried AWIMB's Patrick Vegas? He's a DIY enthusiast with an eye for a deal and a chance to make a few quid. He's just bought a house and loves collecting things so will probably want to buy another one soon.

[Tony C]

Burn it down and claim the insurance

[Tony C]

Oh my god...I was hacked.

I didn’t post the above.

How did this happen??? God dam Russian hackers on awimb.

[eastgermanautos]

I'm a modern hippy. I have a job and stuff.

Hippies have always been adept at making money. That's kind of the point.