Maitland...seems a bit cold letting your mom live in a Storage locker

[Tony C]

We’ve got some proper wastemen in this side

[Burney]

We’ve got some proper wastemen in this side

Isn’t she the lunatic who struck Vic Akers? Best place for her.

Are you actually allowed to live in storage lockers? Where does she poo?

[IUFG]

Isn’t she the lunatic who struck Vic Akers? Best place for her.

Are you actually allowed to live in storage lockers? Where does she poo?

Dick Law, wasn't it?

Propah mentalist, it seems.

Edit: I have no idea where she defecates, btw

[SWv2]

Dick Law, wasn't it?

Propah mentalist, it seems.

Edit: I have no idea where she defecates, btw

For real.

He probably deserved it / she is a mentalist who sees her talented son as her retirement pension.

[Sir C]

For real.

He probably deserved it / she is a mentalist who sees her talented son as her retirement pension.

Did you get any good stuff from your trip to Lidl, sw?

[SWv2]

Did you get any good stuff from your trip to Lidl, sw?


That is not actually *that far* away from where I live though obviously in terms of socio-economic analysis it is worlds apart.

I am in physical pain from the sheer amount of snow I shovelled on Sunday and again yesterday.

[Sir C]

That is not actually *that far* away from where I live though obviously in terms of socio-economic analysis it is worlds apart.

I am in physical pain from the sheer amount of snow I shovelled on Sunday and again yesterday.

You should have borrowed their JCB. Aren’t you all thawed now?

[SWv2]

You should have borrowed their JCB. Aren’t you all thawed now?

Good lord no, our road was cleared on Sunday evening around 10pm (at a cost of €800!!!!) which allowed me to move my car for the first time since last Tuesday.

The pavements/gardens etc. are still totally covered though I came into town this morning for the first time since the above and one would barely know the weather issue existed.

[Rich]

Good lord no, our road was cleared on Sunday evening around 10pm (at a cost of €800!!!!) which allowed me to move my car for the first time since last Tuesday.

The pavements/gardens etc. are still totally covered though I came into town this morning for the first time since the above and one would barely know the weather issue existed.

800 EUR to sweep the road? Was it some chaps in a white Transit that came knocking on the doors?

[SWv2]

800 EUR to sweep the road? Was it some chaps in a white Transit that came knocking on the doors?

Two chaps in a JCB as it goes.

It wasn't sweeping as much as moving / lifting the snowfall from the road surface in order to make it passable. The money was paid by some sort of residents thing which I found out we pay into.

By all accounts we did well to get their service as every housing development in the area were trying to get their services.

Local council weren't going to do fúck all and people needed to get out to work etc.

[HoddGooner]

We’ve got some proper wastemen in this side

As the guy who scouted him, I should point out that the article has more holes than a teabag

[Ash]

As the guy who scouted him, I should point out that the article has more holes than a teabag

How many holes does a teabag have?

[HoddGooner]

Lots and lots and lots

[Burney]

How many holes does a teabag have?

Didn't they used to tell you in one of the Tetley ads back in the 80s? It was either 2,000 or 10,000 perforations.

[Burney]

Lots and lots and lots

Whereabouts in Hertfordshire is her storage locker? Will it lower the house prices? :-(

[HoddGooner]

in which case I change my statement to "there are holes in the article, but nowhere near as many as there are in a Tetley teabag"*

* Other teabags are available.

[Sir C]

Whereabouts in Hertfordshire is her storage locker? Will it lower the house prices? :-(

One of our players' mums lives in a storage locker in Hertfordshire? Is that what I should be understanding from this story?

I don't even know what a storage locker is.

[HoddGooner]

It's somewhere close to Colney, so not a problem for us East Herts residents
:cool:

[Viva Prat Vegas]

So, is HoddGooner a dib-dib-dib ?

[Viva Prat Vegas]

Burney "Whereabouts in Hertfordshire is her storage locker? Will it lower the house prices? "

I will tell Fash to get over there immediately

[HoddGooner]

Given that the article highlighted the fact that she was sneaking in after hours as its not allowed, I think we can safely surmise that he isn't sleeping there any more

[Ash]

Didn't they used to tell you in one of the Tetley ads back in the 80s? It was either 2,000 or 10,000 perforations.

2,000 according to a person on the internet. Less than Blackburn, Lancashire then.

[Sir C]

So, is HoddGooner a dib-dib-dib ?

I always assumed that Hoddgooner was short for HoddleGooner, and that Hodd is, in fact, Glenn Hoddle, who secretly supports The Arsenal, all of which explains why he never really went to town and ripped us a new one when he played against us.

I could be wrong, of course.

[IUFG]

It's somewhere close to Colney, so not a problem for us East Herts residents
:cool:

Enfield innit?

[Burney]

2,000 according to a person on the internet. Less than Blackburn, Lancashire then.

I remember the little cartoon man in the cap with the white coat explaining it with a diagram. I knew the number began with a 't'.

[Burney]

I always assumed that Hoddgooner was short for HoddleGooner, and that Hodd is, in fact, Glenn Hoddle, who secretly supports The Arsenal, all of which explains why he never really went to town and ripped us a new one when he played against us.

I could be wrong, of course.

I'm pretty sure it's Hoddesdon. Just down the road from me.

[HoddGooner]

I played academy football with his brother.....and that had nothing to do with it either....:p

[Sir C]

I'm pretty sure it's Hoddesdon. Just down the road from me.

My theory seems more likely. But in these strange, twisted days, you just can't tell, can you?

[IUFG]

I remember the little cartoon man in the cap with the white coat explaining it with a diagram. I knew the number began with a 't'.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2g6-6KR33WE

[HoddGooner]

kerching!
Though I now live in Stanstead Abbotts (but on the Hoddesdon side of the A414)

[Sir C]

I played academy football with his brother.....and that had nothing to do with it either....:p

He's thrown a seven, apparently. :-(

[Burney]

kerching!
Though I now live in Stanstead Abbotts (but on the Hoddesdon side of the A414)

So near Roydon?

[Viva Prat Vegas]

Runs in the family
What with Maitland seeming to be "a bit cold" too

[Burney]

He's thrown a seven, apparently. :-(

Oof! 40. No age.

[Viva Prat Vegas]

:music:
Tetley tettle-eddle-ee
Flavour lovely as can be
And we all agree
Tetley makes teabags make teeeeeeee-a
:music:

[Sir C]

So near Roydon?

Are you going to stalk him?

Why not just ask him out on a date?

Do people still go out on dates, or do they just 'hook up'? I can't imagine anyone fúcks anyone any more. I mean, they don't drink or take drugs, do they?

[HoddGooner]

Off Ware road on the way from the amwell roundabout going towards Hoddesdon

[Viva Prat Vegas]

Do you leave your key under the mat ?

[Sir C]

Off Ware road on the way from the amwell roundabout going towards Hoddesdon

You've done it now, he's going to be peering in through your curtains, tugging away at his withered old man cóck for all he's worth :-(

[Sir C]

Oof! 40. No age.

And you'd imagine he was pretty fit, as well. Just goes to show.

(I've no idea if it shows anything.)

[Pokster]

You've done it now, he's going to be peering in through your curtains, tugging away at his withered old man cóck for all he's worth :-(

I read that wrong, I first thought you were implying b was going to be tossing off his old man :yikes:

[HoddGooner]

Given my photo is in the online version of the article.....
:hide::banghead:

[Sir C]

I read that wrong, I first thought you were implying b was going to be tossing off his old man :yikes:

Fantasies are fine, p, just as long as they remain inside your head. :-(

[Burney]

Off Ware road on the way from the amwell roundabout going towards Hoddesdon

Ah, right. I'm always amused when driving up the Ware Road by the caff with the delightful name 'All About The Sausage'. It reminds me of Pokster's mum.

[Pokster]

Fantasies are fine, p, just as long as they remain inside your head. :-(

I'm sorry... I'm troubled my first thought was that

[Ash]

Are you going to stalk him?

Why not just ask him out on a date?

Do people still go out on dates, or do they just 'hook up'? I can't imagine anyone fúcks anyone any more. I mean, they don't drink or take drugs, do they?

I think they use an app that fùcks for them. It arranges consent and so on with the other app, leaving the people free to avoid all the risks associated with intimate relationships.

[Viva Prat Vegas]

Looking for a roll in Carry On AWIMB

[HoddGooner]

It is certainly busy.

[Sir C]

Looking for a roll in Carry On AWIMB

I suspect you have a programme from the 70s featuring a colour spread of HoddGooner's living room, s?

[Ash]

I remember the little cartoon man in the cap with the white coat explaining it with a diagram. I knew the number began with a 't'.

I know a bloke from Doncaster who used to work in a tea factory. A proper Yorkshire job, that.

[Sir C]

Given my photo is in the online version of the article.....
:hide::banghead:

You play for Sheff Utd?

[Viva Prat Vegas]

Sir C "I suspect you have a programme from the 70s featuring a colour spread of HoddGooner's living room, vpv?"

I have one of HoddGooner in tight shorts playing Swingball with Brian McDermott Mark Heeley and Paul Vaessen in his back garden
Steve Walford is in the background mowing the lawn

[Sir C]

Sir C "I suspect you have a programme from the 70s featuring a colour spread of HoddGooner's living room, vpv?"

I have one of HoddGooner in tight shorts playing Swingball with Brian McDermott Mark Heeley and Paul Vaessen in his back garden
Steve Walford is in the background mowing the lawn

Back in 5.

[Burney]

And you'd imagine he was pretty fit, as well. Just goes to show.

(I've no idea if it shows anything.)

I was thinking about this the other day whilst hanging around in a graveyard. I used to enjoy looking at graves when I was younger. Now, not so much. There are too many people in them younger than me. :-(

[Sir C]

I think they use an app that fùcks for them. It arranges consent and so on with the other app, leaving the people free to avoid all the risks associated with intimate relationships.

I can't say I blame them. As old wossname said, 'The position is ridiculous, the pleasure momentary and the expense damnable!'

[Viva Prat Vegas]

Sir C "You play for Sheff Utd?"

Given that Hoddgooner keeps using the word "Given" I now know who he is

Used to play for Newcastle
:nod:

[Viva Prat Vegas]

Sir c "Back in 5."

Raphael Meade is there too
Pretending to clean the windows

[Sir C]

I was thinking about this the other day whilst hanging around in a graveyard. I used to enjoy looking at graves when I was younger. Now, not so much. There are too many people in them younger than me. :-(

Was there a particular reason you were hanging around a graveyard? You weren't waiting for the 'Spoons to open, were you? :-(

[IUFG]

I was thinking about this the other day whilst hanging around in a graveyard. I used to enjoy looking at graves when I was younger. Now, not so much. There are too many people in them younger than me. :-(

Lena Zavaroni's? She's buried in Hoddesdon.

[Burney]

Was there a particular reason you were hanging around a graveyard? You weren't waiting for the 'Spoons to open, were you? :-(

It was the one with Harold Abrahams in it last week.

Although I will admit I was waiting for the pub to open, yes. :-\

[Burney]

Lena Zavaroni's? She's buried in Hoddesdon.

Is she? In the big cemetery on your right as you go into Hoddesdon? Narrow grave, is it? One pallbearer job?

[Viva Prat Vegas]

Burney is only following in the footsteps of a Palace hero
Kenny Sansom used to doss down in a graveyard after Wetherspoons had closed for the night

[Viva Prat Vegas]

Burney " One pallbearer job?"

Carried under the arm

[Burney]

Burney " One pallbearer job?"

Carried under the arm

:nod: You'd negotiate a discount, though, wouldn't you?

[Viva Prat Vegas]

hoddgooner "Given my photo is in the online version of the article....."

Are you the one with the pinkish face and massive right hand ?
Or are you the younger man on the right with two differnt hair colours ?

[Viva Prat Vegas]

Burney " You'd negotiate a discount, though, wouldn't you?"

:nod: Forget the shovel
A trowel will do

[Burney]

Burney " You'd negotiate a discount, though, wouldn't you?"

:nod: Forget the shovel
A trowel will do

No need for a hearse, we'll just post her.

[IUFG]

Is she? In the big cemetery on your right as you go into Hoddesdon? Narrow grave, is it? One pallbearer job?


Ware Road, I think.

A post Auguer was used . . .

[SWv2]

As the guy who scouted him, I should point out that the article has more holes than a teabag

I want, actually I demand, to know who else you scouted?

Give me names, players, ballers. Not shít****s mind.

[Burney]

I want, actually I demand, to know who else you scouted?

Give me names, players, ballers. Not shít****s mind.

He’s probably going to be a bit coy about the whole thing in the post-Barry Bennell universe, sw. It’s now a bit like being a scoutmaster or a choirmaster, a priest or a Radio 1 DJ. Everyone’s going to assume you’re a nonce even if you’re not. :-(

Mind you, I’m certain hg is one of the non-noncey ones. :thumbup:

[Sir C]

He’s probably going to be a bit coy about the whole thing in the post-Barry Bennell universe, sw. It’s now a bit like being a scoutmaster or a choirmaster, a priest or a Radio 1 DJ. Everyone’s going to assume you’re a nonce even if you’re not. :-(

Mind you, I’m certain hg is one of the non-noncey ones. :thumbup:

You're only saying that because he's from Hertfordshire. It's geographically-based favouritism.

Poor show.

[Burney]

You're only saying that because he's from Hertfordshire. It's geographically-based favouritism.

Poor show.

The fellow only lives round the corner. I can’t very well call him a nonce, can I? :shrug:

[Pokster]

The fellow only lives round the corner. I can’t very well call him a nonce, can I? :shrug:

Perhaps that area is a hot bed for nonce's????? :rubchin:

[redgunamo]

Perhaps that area is a hot bed for nonce's????? :rubchin:

Interesting point; nice neighbourhoods with lots of well-to-do parents that are too busy to take care of their children properly ... :rubchin:

[HoddGooner]

Only 1 other player you would know of in our 1st team squad - Joe Willock

[Viva Prat Vegas]

hoddgooner "Given my photo is in the online version of the article....."

Are you the one with the pinkish face and massive right hand ?
Or are you the younger man on the right with two different hair colours ?