Very kind of you to offer suggestions for my next paramour and it really has to be

[Herbert Augustus Chapman]

Monty's mum. I know for a fact her mingeage is like a hipsters beard because m told me*.

Imagine being able to do all that mum stuff for real! "yea well, like, last night when I was grimly thrusting my blood gorged glans into yer mum's lubricious, grateful growler".

*when I asked him if it grew wild he did not say that it didn't.

[Sir C]

Monty's mum. I know for a fact her mingeage is like a hipsters beard because m told me*.

Imagine being able to do all that mum stuff for real! "yea well, like, last night when I was grimly thrusting my blood gorged glans into yer mum's lubricious, grateful growler".

*when I asked him if it grew wild he did not say that it didn't.

I find this casual objectification of women, both *****ed and non-*****ed women, most offensive.

A little respect, that's all I ask.

[Herbert Augustus Chapman]

I find this casual objectification of women, both *****ed and non-*****ed women, most offensive.

A little respect, that's all I ask.

Don't fall for any of this sensitivity tripe c. Women still yearn for the forceful, violent love of a brute.

Remember The Lady and the Wimp from Timeout in the 70's. Don't be the Wimp c, be Wayne. The cloven hoofed man-goat that always ended up ploughing the Lady.

[Sir C]

Don't fall for any of this sensitivity tripe c. Women still yearn for the forceful, violent love of a brute.

Remember The Lady and the Wimp from Timeout in the 70's. Don't be the Wimp c, be Wayne. The cloven hoofed man-goat that always ended up ploughing the Lady.

h, I haven't achieved a useable degree of tumescence since before 9/11. Ploughing a lady really isn't an option for me :-(

[Herbert Augustus Chapman]

h, I haven't achieved a useable degree of tumescence since before 9/11. Ploughing a lady really isn't an option for me :-(

Nonsense c. A GP friend of mine confided in me that 90% of the impotence cases he diagnosed were nothing more than indifference. Your woman is clearly some cantankerous boiler who no longer exudes the pungency of libido.

Get with some randy young tart and you'll have a boner that could drill holes in a brick.