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Ganpati's Goonerz--AFC's Aboriginal Fertility Cult
09-28-2017, 03:06 PM
Great. Ashes tour coming up and we only have 2 proper batsmen in our top 5. Which is the weakest line up I can remember. Our only hope was our lower middle order (coupled with both Cook and Root being at the top of their games.)

We therefore really needed a top drawer all-rounder. There's no point in replacing him with a bastman as we don't have any - we only have 2 proper batsmen in the whole country. Compared to Vince and Ballance etc, we might as well let my glw have a slog.

So we'd have to play another seamer. 4 quicks and Ali. But YJB at 6, Moeen at 7 and Woakes at 8 doesn't look as strong now. And just when Stokes was really starting to play well with both bat and ball. I was rather relying on him swinging a couple of games with a counter-attacking ton and a 5/6 wkt haul.

Why on earth did he let that pleb wind him up? Where was Broad to keep things calm like he did with Root in that bar?

Utter idiot.

Btw what is that Foakes like with the bat? I know Stewart says he's the best keeper in the country. Could YJB play as a proper batsman at no.5 or 6? He's got a FC average of almost 42 compared to Woakes' 36 and a bit and Ali's 38.5.

Ali, Foakes ans Woakes at 7/8/9 perhaps? But then it's only 3 quicks and Ali. That won't work.

We're doomed.

Burney
09-28-2017, 03:10 PM
Great. Ashes tour coming up and we only have 2 proper batsmen in our top 5. Which is the weakest line up I can remember. Our only hope was our lower middle order (coupled with both Cook and Root being at the top of their games.)

We therefore really needed a top drawer all-rounder. There's no point in replacing him with a bastman as we don't have any - we only have 2 proper batsmen in the whole country. Compared to Vince and Ballance etc, we might as well let my glw have a slog.

So we'd have to play another seamer. 4 quicks and Ali. But YJB at 6, Moeen at 7 and Woakes at 8 doesn't look as strong now. And just when Stokes was really starting to play well with both bat and ball. I was rather relying on him swinging a couple of games with a counter-attacking ton and a 5/6 wkt haul.

Why on earth did he let that pleb wind him up? Where was Broad to keep things calm like he did with Root in that bar?

Utter idiot.

Btw what is that Foakes like with the bat? I know Stewart says he's the best keeper in the country. Could YJB play as a proper batsman at no.5 or 6? He's got a FC average of almost 42 compared to Woakes' 36 and a bit and Ali's 38.5.

Ali, Foakes ans Woakes at 7/8/9 perhaps? But then it's only 3 quicks and Ali. That won't work.

We're doomed.

Ridicules decision imo. What's the world coming to when a chap can't engage in a bout of healthy fisticuffs without getting dropped? Do we want milksops and plaster saints playing for us?

SWv2
09-28-2017, 03:15 PM
Ridicules decision imo. What's the world coming to when a chap can't engage in a bout of healthy fisticuffs without getting dropped? Do we want milksops and plaster saints playing for us?

May not be allowed to leave the country if the CPS decide to charge – which they should.

The man is dangerous.

As for Ganpati’s unsubstantiated claims that this other innocent bystander was a “pleb” who “wound him up” I simply don’t know where to begin.


As I have remarked earlier, if this was a footballer there would be no sympathy.

IUFG
09-28-2017, 03:19 PM
As for Ganpati’s unsubstantiated claims that this other innocent bystander was a “pleb” who “wound him up” I simply don’t know where to begin.

tbf to G, what type of person goes to a ****ing nightclub (this may have been a bar with a late licence, etc) on a Sunday night? I'm guessing plebs, weirdos and aggressive cricketers.

Ganpati's Goonerz--AFC's Aboriginal Fertility Cult
09-28-2017, 03:20 PM
Ridicules decision imo. What's the world coming to when a chap can't engage in a bout of healthy fisticuffs without getting dropped? Do we want milksops and plaster saints playing for us?

Agreed. It's like poor Monty getting into **** for pissing on a bouncer. Has a bouncer ever won us a series in India, out bowling the natives and even opening the bowling in a 2nd innings? No. I think any player that has done that for his country, or has scored tones and taken fivefers in Aus, and slogged a 250 in SA and has more tons and fivefers at 26 than Freddie got in his entire career should be exempt from prosecution simply for slapping some oik that almost certainly deserved it.

But we don't have a bastman to replace him with. And we can't really start with 3 quicks and Ali.

Foakes has a better FC average than both Vince and Malan so why aren't we giving him a go ffs?

This is a disaster, Berni.

Burney
09-28-2017, 03:22 PM
May not be allowed to leave the country if the CPS decide to charge – which they should.

The man is dangerous.

As for Ganpati’s unsubstantiated claims that this other innocent bystander was a “pleb” who “wound him up” I simply don’t know where to begin.


As I have remarked earlier, if this was a footballer there would be no sympathy.

But - crucially - he's not a footballer. He's a cricketer and therefore a better sort of chap automatically.

He's almost certainly behaved heroically, fighting off scum who attack people with bottles. Prosecuting him would be a travesty.

**********FREE STOKES************

Burney
09-28-2017, 03:24 PM
Agreed. It's like poor Monty getting into **** for pissing on a bouncer. Has a bouncer ever won us a series in India, out bowling the natives and even opening the bowling in a 2nd innings? No. I think any player that has done that for his country, or has scored tones and taken fivefers in Aus, and slogged a 250 in SA and has more tons and fivefers at 26 than Freddie got in his entire career should be exempt from prosecution simply for slapping some oik that almost certainly deserved it.

But we don't have a bastman to replace him with. And we can't really start with 3 quicks and Ali.

Foakes has a better FC average than both Vince and Malan so why aren't we giving him a go ffs?

This is a disaster, Berni.

:nod: The chap who attacked Stokes' fist with his jaw ought to be strung up if you ask me.

SWv2
09-28-2017, 03:25 PM
But - crucially - he's not a footballer. He's a cricketer and therefore a better sort of chap automatically.

He's almost certainly behaved heroically, fighting off scum who attack people with bottles. Prosecuting him would be a travesty.

**********FREE STOKES************

Where was the bottle?

I know a lad who was arrested once in North London and in his possession was a bottle of beer. Said bottle later turned up smashed and was suggested to be a weapon!!!!!!

Cast iron FACT and indeed END OF.

:sherlock:

Ganpati's Goonerz--AFC's Aboriginal Fertility Cult
09-28-2017, 03:30 PM
:nod: The chap who attacked Stokes' fist with his jaw ought to be strung up if you ask me.

Agreed. ***** FREE STOKES *****

IUFG
09-28-2017, 03:30 PM
Where was the bottle?

I know a lad who was arrested once in North London and in his possession was a bottle of beer. Said bottle later turned up smashed and was suggested to be a weapon!!!!!!

Cast iron FACT and indeed END OF.

:sherlock:

To be fair, Brizzle does sound a little wild if today's snapshot of the local rag is true...

http://www.bristolpost.co.uk/news/bristol-news/man-repeatedly-hit-over-head-547042

http://www.bristolpost.co.uk/news/bristol-news/police-called-after-man-spotted-548320

and worst of all

http://www.bristolpost.co.uk/news/bristol-news/police-smash-down-door-turn-544593

Peter
09-28-2017, 03:38 PM
May not be allowed to leave the country if the CPS decide to charge – which they should.

The man is dangerous.

As for Ganpati’s unsubstantiated claims that this other innocent bystander was a “pleb” who “wound him up” I simply don’t know where to begin.


As I have remarked earlier, if this was a footballer there would be no sympathy.

If he was a footballer he would be playing for his club this weekend. FACT.

Cricket will deal with this in an appropriate manner. Hopefully one in which he gets to play in the Ashes.

As for the fella he chinned, pay him off. I would take a smack in the mouth for 20 or 30 grand. Win-win.

SWv2
09-28-2017, 03:39 PM
To be fair, Brizzle does sound a little wild if today's snapshot of the local rag is true...

http://www.bristolpost.co.uk/news/bristol-news/man-repeatedly-hit-over-head-547042

http://www.bristolpost.co.uk/news/bristol-news/police-called-after-man-spotted-548320

and worst of all

http://www.bristolpost.co.uk/news/bristol-news/police-smash-down-door-turn-544593

The last one is brilliant :hehe:

Ganpati's Goonerz--AFC's Aboriginal Fertility Cult
09-28-2017, 03:46 PM
If he was a footballer he would be playing for his club this weekend. FACT.

Cricket will deal with this in an appropriate manner. Hopefully one in which he gets to play in the Ashes.

As for the fella he chinned, pay him off. I would take a smack in the mouth for 20 or 30 grand. Win-win.

Good idea. Bung him a few grand. FFS, one extra won test down under must be worth a bit to the ECB, and an on form Stokes is likely to play a part in winning a match that we wouldn't have won without him.

Are you allowed to do this in the UK, though? In Pakistan etc you can get given blood money. But would this be bribing a witness or whatever? Are you allowed to pay money to get someone to drop the charges over here?

IUFG
09-28-2017, 03:48 PM
The last one is brilliant :hehe:

True.

****ing mentalist.

Him, not you.

Peter
09-28-2017, 03:51 PM
Good idea. Bung him a few grand. FFS, one extra won test down under must be worth a bit to the ECB, and an on form Stokes is likely to play a part in winning a match that we wouldn't have won without him.

Are you allowed to do this in the UK, though? In Pakistan etc you can get given blood money. But would this be bribing a witness or whatever? Are you allowed to pay money to get someone to drop the charges over here?

In a criminal case it is the CPS that charge you, not the victim. Clearly if the victim decides they no longer wish to be a witness or to participate in the case it hugely weakens that case.

No, of course you cant bribe them but as I understand it, were they to launch a civil claim you could settle that out of order straight away and then 'anticipate' that the victim withdraws their involvement from the criminal case. The problem being that settling the civil case implies guilt....

Its only illegal if you get caught :D

I am guessing on all of this, by the way.

Rich
09-28-2017, 03:53 PM
Ridicules decision imo. What's the world coming to when a chap can't engage in a bout of healthy fisticuffs without getting dropped? Do we want milksops and plaster saints playing for us?

It's f*cking outrageous - just a little drunken escapade. He's clearly been deliberately wound up by these idiots - probably Austrialians. Flintoff got away with murder by comparison.

Whoever released the CCTV should hang their damned heads in shame. Pathetic.

Herbert Augustus Chapman
09-28-2017, 03:56 PM
May not be allowed to leave the country if the CPS decide to charge – which they should.

The man is dangerous.

As for Ganpati’s unsubstantiated claims that this other innocent bystander was a “pleb” who “wound him up” I simply don’t know where to begin.


As I have remarked earlier, if this was a footballer there would be no sympathy.

Yes but cricket is enjoyed by, and mostly played by, nice middle-class types S. For sure the odd oik like Botham and Stokes have to be tolerated so we can actually win some something now and then but it's not as if he hit a nice middle-class person now is it?

I think you're being churlish and frankly, an Irisher tsk tsk'ing about pub brawls is a little rich.

SWv2
09-28-2017, 03:58 PM
In a criminal case it is the CPS that charge you, not the victim. Clearly if the victim decides they no longer wish to be a witness or to participate in the case it hugely weakens that case.



You are correct, which is incredible in itself.

Of course the requirement for the injured party to act as witness only comes into play if the accused pleads not guilty, which itself causes the case to be adjourned on numerous occasions through the Magistrates Court before being sent to Crown Court, Wood Green for example.

I would have thought the likelihood here is that BS pleads guilty – based on overwhelming video evidence which shows him to be the clear aggressor - in order to close the whole thing and gets a very soft punishment as a result.

SWv2
09-28-2017, 04:03 PM
Yes but cricket is enjoyed by, and mostly played by, nice middle-class types S. For sure the odd oik like Botham and Stokes have to be tolerated so we can actually win some something now and then but it's not as if he hit a nice middle-class person now is it?

I think you're being churlish and frankly, an Irisher tsk tsk'ing about pub brawls is a little rich.

I am only ever interested in justice H.

Pokster
09-29-2017, 06:53 AM
Great. Ashes tour coming up and we only have 2 proper batsmen in our top 5. Which is the weakest line up I can remember. Our only hope was our lower middle order (coupled with both Cook and Root being at the top of their games.)

We therefore really needed a top drawer all-rounder. There's no point in replacing him with a bastman as we don't have any - we only have 2 proper batsmen in the whole country. Compared to Vince and Ballance etc, we might as well let my glw have a slog.

So we'd have to play another seamer. 4 quicks and Ali. But YJB at 6, Moeen at 7 and Woakes at 8 doesn't look as strong now. And just when Stokes was really starting to play well with both bat and ball. I was rather relying on him swinging a couple of games with a counter-attacking ton and a 5/6 wkt haul.

Why on earth did he let that pleb wind him up? Where was Broad to keep things calm like he did with Root in that bar?

Utter idiot.

Btw what is that Foakes like with the bat? I know Stewart says he's the best keeper in the country. Could YJB play as a proper batsman at no.5 or 6? He's got a FC average of almost 42 compared to Woakes' 36 and a bit and Ali's 38.5.

Ali, Foakes ans Woakes at 7/8/9 perhaps? But then it's only 3 quicks and Ali. That won't work.

We're doomed.

More to the point... who gives a ****, it's only :cricket:

World's End Stella
09-29-2017, 09:27 AM
I'm loving his strategy to get out of this; claiming that he was defending two benders from homophobic abuse. :hehe:

You chin some bloke and then move straight into virtue signaling mode in order to get out of it. Genius.

Burney
09-29-2017, 09:29 AM
I'm loving his strategy to get out of this; claiming that he was defending two benders from homophobic abuse. :hehe:

You chin some bloke and then move straight into virtue signaling mode in order to get out of it. Genius.

I am not fancying his chances, tbh.

Ash
09-29-2017, 09:32 AM
You chin some bloke and then move straight into virtue signaling mode in order to get out of it. Genius.

It's what the USA has been doing for decades at a geopolitical level, tbf.

redgunamo
09-29-2017, 11:57 AM
It's what the USA has been doing for decades at a geopolitical level, tbf.

Understandable, really. They don't teach you nation building at McClellan Avenue. Or even at Sandhurst, for that matter.

Rich
09-29-2017, 12:08 PM
I'm loving his strategy to get out of this; claiming that he was defending two benders from homophobic abuse. :hehe:

You chin some bloke and then move straight into virtue signaling mode in order to get out of it. Genius.

Do you know that he wasn't doing that for a fact, WES? I'm sure both will be making their cases to the ECB who won't have any grounds to disbelieve them. Sure, it went a bit far but to say he should be kicked off The Ashes tour is a little extreme.

And anyway, the other parties were throwing glass bottles in the video - so they're clearly not the most savoury chaps.

Peter
09-29-2017, 12:15 PM
I'm loving his strategy to get out of this; claiming that he was defending two benders from homophobic abuse. :hehe:

You chin some bloke and then move straight into virtue signaling mode in order to get out of it. Genius.

Firstly, Stokes hasn't claimed anything.

Secondly, he may well have been defending a couple of benders. WE shall see.

Thirdly, it isn't his fault that public perception is so dominated by these values that it is the best defence.

Finally, the geezer was asking for a hiding and he got off lightly.

You'd think these arse bandits would be a bit more grateful. Not a word of thanks so far

Pokster
09-29-2017, 12:23 PM
Do you know that he wasn't doing that for a fact, WES? I'm sure both will be making their cases to the ECB who won't have any grounds to disbelieve them. Sure, it went a bit far but to say he should be kicked off The Ashes tour is a little extreme.

And anyway, the other parties were throwing glass bottles in the video - so they're clearly not the most savoury chaps.

The glass bottles were knocked out of his hand by Stokes... IF he gets charged i don't think they can take him

Rich
09-29-2017, 01:41 PM
The glass bottles were knocked out of his hand by Stokes... IF he gets charged i don't think they can take him

Jobsworths at the CPS will want to make an example of him. What a pity.

The only hope is that they decide to charge him after the tour. I'm sure they are very busy and have a large backlog of cases to review before they get to looking at old Stokesy.

Burney
09-29-2017, 01:51 PM
The glass bottles were knocked out of his hand by Stokes... IF he gets charged i don't think they can take him

:nod: Right. He's basically a hero like Jackie Chan or Jason Statham imo.