Blokes on moped mounted the curb and snatched the missus's phone this morning

[Monty92]

Rode off and gave her a cheery wave, the cheeky wee scamps.

Three police officers came round to do their thing. Turns out they are legally not allowed to chase people on bikes in case they fall off. Hence, an epidemic of phone snatchings across the capital.

Least it wasn't acid, 'spose. I'd have had to dump her.

[Burney]

Rode off and gave her a cheery wave, the cheeky wee scamps.

Three police officers came round to do their thing. Turns out they are legally not allowed to chase people on bikes in case they fall off. Hence, an epidemic of phone snatchings across the capital.

Least it wasn't acid, 'spose. I'd have had to dump her.

I'm sorry to hear that, m. The poor girl must be a bit shaken. :-(

[Sir C]

Rode off and gave her a cheery wave, the cheeky wee scamps.

Three police officers came round to do their thing. Turns out they are legally not allowed to chase people on bikes in case they fall off. Hence, an epidemic of phone snatchings across the capital.

Least it wasn't acid, 'spose. I'd have had to dump her.

Why are you on here and not out looking for the ****s?

[Burney]

Why are you on here and not out looking for the ****s?

They would probably throw acid in m's face, tbf, thus ruining his pride and joy.

[SWv2]

Rode off and gave her a cheery wave, the cheeky wee scamps.

Three police officers came round to do their thing. Turns out they are legally not allowed to chase people on bikes in case they fall off. Hence, an epidemic of phone snatchings across the capital.

Least it wasn't acid, 'spose. I'd have had to dump her.

The Feds chased and were deemed responsible for the death of a youth on a moped in Islington, Liverpool Road direction I think.

Fingers burned and all that.

[Monty92]

The Feds chased and were deemed responsible for the death of a youth on a moped in Islington, Liverpool Road direction I think.

Fingers burned and all that.

Yep, they mentioned that incident. Literally said it's more than their job's worth to give chase nowadays. Yoots intentionally take off their helmets (and wear bandanas underneath to conceal their identity) to make sure the police are too scared to chase them.

[Burney]

The Feds chased and were deemed responsible for the death of a youth on a moped.

Ermmm...good. :shrug:

Surely better a dead scrote than an inconvenienced law-abiding citizen?

[Monty92]

I'm sorry to hear that, m. The poor girl must be a bit shaken. :-(

She came home in floods of tears.

I know it was probably a stolen moped, but I was a bit surprised she didn't instinctively look at their number plate. Surely that's the first thing you do after the immediate shock?

[World's End Stella]

Ermmm...good. :shrug:

Surely better a dead scrote than an inconvenienced law-abiding citizen?

Yes, but I think the issue is that these chases endanger the public generally, not just the scrote.

Which is fair enough, really.

[Herbert Augustus Chapman]

I hope you at least pretended to be furious for your wife. She will be bitterly disappointed if you don't behave like a real man over this m.

Was she walking along yapping into the thing and causing folk on the pavement to have to navigate around her?

[Monty92]

Yes, but I think the issue is that these chases endanger the public generally, not just the scrote.

Which is fair enough, really.

Sure, although if the police had the power to give chase these incidents would decrease hugely. It's not worth their while to nick a phone (which they'll get about £50 for) if there's a fair chance of getting caught. The very reason they do it is because they know the police are hamstrung

[Monty92]

I hope you at least pretended to be furious for your wife. She will be bitterly disappointed if you don't behave like a real man over this m.

Was she walking along yapping into the thing and causing folk on the pavement to have to navigate around her?

She does do plenty of phone yapping on the street, but on this occasion I think she had it out to use to pay for her bus fare.

[Burney]

She came home in floods of tears.

I know it was probably a stolen moped, but I was a bit surprised she didn't instinctively look at their number plate. Surely that's the first thing you do after the immediate shock?

Human beings without training don't respond like that. They are first shocked and disbelieving, thinking this can't be real or must be a joke. Their eyes will be drawn to the person rather than a number plate and, by the time the disbelief has worn off, the perpetrator has long since fúcked off.

[Burney]

Yes, but I think the issue is that these chases endanger the public generally, not just the scrote.

Which is fair enough, really.

And thus does the rule of law break down. :shrug:

[Pat Vegas]

Rode off and gave her a cheery wave, the cheeky wee scamps.

Three police officers came round to do their thing. Turns out they are legally not allowed to chase people on bikes in case they fall off. Hence, an epidemic of phone snatchings across the capital.

Least it wasn't acid, 'spose. I'd have had to dump her.

Where did it happen Monty? I've seen this a few times around Angel and Clerkenwell recently.

[Monty92]

Where did it happen Monty? I've seen this a few times around Angel and Clerkenwell recently.

Yep, they come from Tottenham/Edmongton to middle class north London to prey on people who aren't used to interacting with black people and freeze in their presence.

The police told us they'd had 17 reports of stolen phones in 45 minutes around north London the other day.

[Burney]

Yep, they come from Tottenham/Edmongton to middle class north London to prey on people who aren't used to interacting with black people and freeze in their presence.

The police told us they'd had 17 reports of stolen phones in 45 minutes around north London the other day.

The only sensible reaction to young black males in London is fear and suspicion, as Gavin de Becker could tell you.

[Monty92]

The only sensible reaction to young black males in London is fear and suspicion, as Gavin de Becker could tell you.

There's a pwoper mental one who roams the streets of East Finchley. He prowls around wearing a baseball cap and a hoodie and looks scary as fúck, especially when he walks into the road and approaches your car when you're sitting in traffic. But then he raises his head and invariably has a massive gormless grin on his face. The first couple of times he does it you shít yourself, but then you realise he's just a harmless mentaller and you almost start to look forward to seeing him around.

[Pat Vegas]

The only sensible reaction to young black males in London is fear and suspicion, as Gavin de Becker could tell you.

I treat everyone like that.

[Peter]

Rode off and gave her a cheery wave, the cheeky wee scamps.

Three police officers came round to do their thing. Turns out they are legally not allowed to chase people on bikes in case they fall off. Hence, an epidemic of phone snatchings across the capital.

Least it wasn't acid, 'spose. I'd have had to dump her.

I don't want to appear insensitive but....Muslims??

[Burney]

I treat everyone like that.

Very wise. I've been reading 'The Gift of Fear' recently. It points out that our desire not to be seen as rude, anti-social or racist causes us to suppress and ignore our natural intuitions of fear and get us into terrible trouble - not least because these weaknesses are exploited by those most likely to harm us.

[Monty92]

I don't want to appear insensitive but....Muslims??

I wouldn't rule it out, but generally speaking muslims tend to use vehicles to mow down kafirs, not steal their phones.

[Peter]

I wouldn't rule it out, but generally speaking muslims tend to use vehicles to mow down kafirs, not steal their phones.

Not in Malaysia. Modern, peace loving Malaysia. They love a bit of moped handbag theft. Has happened to two of my colleagues (female of course). Not pleasant. I imagine your better half is a tad shaken?

THat is as compassionate as I get, sorry.

[Monty92]

Not in Malaysia. Modern, peace loving Malaysia. They love a bit of moped handbag theft. Has happened to two of my colleagues (female of course). Not pleasant. I imagine your better half is a tad shaken?

THat is as compassionate as I get, sorry.

By the way, regarding your dismissal of Burney's point yesterday about demographics and how you "doubt they are going to run the show any time soon"......Currently the UK's Muslim population is multiplying 75% every 10 years and at that same rate the muslim population in the UK could be 26 million by 2050. (this is of course dependent on a number of variables, but that is the current trajectory).

[Peter]

By the way, regarding your dismissal of Burney's point yesterday about demographics and how you "doubt they are going to run the show any time soon"......Currently the UK's Muslim population is multiplying 75% every 10 years and at that same rate the muslim population in the UK could be 26 million by 2050. (this is of course dependent on a number of variables, but that is the current trajectory).

Sure is a lot of muslims. You had better start learning how to get on with them hadn't you ;)

[Burney]

Have you had a chance to listen to Sam's chat with Douglas Murray yet? Some interesting stuff. Sam comes across as a bit prissy at some points, but I'm used to that.

[Burney]

Sure is a lot of muslims. You had better start learning how to get on with them hadn't you ;)

Hmmm. A courtesy many of them have notably failed to extend to us, of course.

[Monty92]

Sure is a lot of muslims. You had better start learning how to get on with them hadn't you ;)

Yes, you just keep saying stupid things and then making a joke when your stupidity is pointed out.

[Peter]

Yes, you just keep saying stupid things and then making a joke when your stupidity is pointed out.



OK, as you insist on paraphrasing everything I say (running the show??) let me do the same to you.

Islam is inherently evil, they come here and try and change our law, rape our young women, they want to kill us all and they breed like ****ing rabbits so in 30 years time we will be completely overrun by them and will be under Sharia law. Is that what you want? I suppose you'd like that wouldn't you, eh????

You come out with all this **** when even by your own admission your experience of this evil is listening to a few comments from Ash's London walks, having to sit next to the odd muslim on the tube and stalking your only muslim neighbour (the non contract signing ****) with requests for selfies.

And on top of all that when somebody who actually grew up alongside these communities gives up trying to talk you down and attempts to diffuse your nonsense by ending the conversation you resort to childish insults and 'talk sport-like' provocation.

I suppose what I am trying to say is that instead of sitting on here holding forth about islamic scripture why don't you actually go out and talk to some of these people?

Now, shall we move on to Brexit?

[Peter]

Hmmm. A courtesy many of them have notably failed to extend to us, of course.

Not to me. I get on with them just fine.

Maybe its you, b?

[Monty92]

OK, as you insist on paraphrasing everything I say (running the show??) let me do the same to you.

Islam is inherently evil, they come here and try and change our law, rape our young women, they want to kill us all and they breed like ****ing rabbits so in 30 years time we will be completely overrun by them and will be under Sharia law. Is that what you want? I suppose you'd like that wouldn't you, eh????

You come out with all this **** when even by your own admission your experience of this evil is listening to a few comments from Ash's London walks, having to sit next to the odd muslim on the tube and stalking your only muslim neighbour (the non contract signing ****) with requests for selfies.

And on top of all that when somebody who actually grew up alongside these communities gives up trying to talk you down and attempts to diffuse your nonsense by ending the conversation you resort to childish insults and 'talk sport-like' provocation.

I suppose what I am trying to say is that instead of sitting on here holding forth about islamic scripture why don't you actually go out and talk to some of these people?

Now, shall we move on to Brexit?

Please point me towards what I've said that is "nonsense"...

[Burney]

OK, as you insist on paraphrasing everything I say (running the show??) let me do the same to you.

Islam is inherently evil, they come here and try and change our law, rape our young women, they want to kill us all and they breed like ****ing rabbits so in 30 years time we will be completely overrun by them and will be under Sharia law. Is that what you want? I suppose you'd like that wouldn't you, eh????

You come out with all this **** when even by your own admission your experience of this evil is listening to a few comments from Ash's London walks, having to sit next to the odd muslim on the tube and stalking your only muslim neighbour (the non contract signing ****) with requests for selfies.

And on top of all that when somebody who actually grew up alongside these communities gives up trying to talk you down and attempts to diffuse your nonsense by ending the conversation you resort to childish insults and 'talk sport-like' provocation.

I suppose what I am trying to say is that instead of sitting on here holding forth about islamic scripture why don't you actually go out and talk to some of these people?

Now, shall we move on to Brexit?

You grew up with largely secular and westernised Turkish Cypriots. They are not the problem and neither are they anywhere near the most statistically significant muslim population in this country. By contrast, my wife grew up in Bradford alongside muslims who still have the dust of the Kashmir and the Punjab still on their shalwar kameez. She got a bit sick of being called 'kuffar whore' every day when she dared to wear jeans or a skirt. She was also utterly unfazed by the grooming scandals, since she and everyone else she'd grown up with had known they were going on for years.

Those are the people we're dealing with, p. And let's call them what they are: barbarians. And we are filling our towns and cities with them.

[Peter]

You grew up with largely secular and westernised Turkish Cypriots. They are not the problem and neither are they the largest muslim population in this country. My wife grew up in Bradford alongside muslims who still have the dust of the Kashmir and the Punjab still on their shalwar kameez. She got a bit sick of being called 'kuffar whore' every day when she dared to wear jeans or a skirt. She was also utterly unfazed by the grooming scandals, since she and everyone else she'd grown up with had known they were going on for years.

Those are the people we're dealing with, p. And let's call them what they are: barbarians. And we are filling our towns and cities with them.

No, sorry, you cant have that. When I separate muslims I am accused of liking the sea but not the part that fills my lungs and drowns me.

when you two start giving me your population forecasts you are lumping every single muslim in the UK into one barrel and giving me a mass number of fundamental ****wits. You cant have it both ways- you cant tell me I was lucky to grow up with the good muslims and then still count them.

For the record the biggest communities where I lived were the pakistani and bangladeshi muslim communities. As you say, you barely even knew the turkish cypriots were muslim.

[Peter]

Please point me towards what I've said that is "nonsense"...

I thought I told you to go and talk to some muslims? What are you still doing here?

[Burney]

No, sorry, you cant have that. When I separate muslims I am accused of liking the sea but not the part that fills my lungs and drowns me.

when you two start giving me your population forecasts you are lumping every single muslim in the UK into one barrel and giving me a mass number of fundamental ****wits. You cant have it both ways- you cant tell me I was lucky to grow up with the good muslims and then still count them.

For the record the biggest communities where I lived were the pakistani and bangladeshi muslim communities. As you say, you barely even knew the turkish cypriots were muslim.

That wasn't my point. My point was that Turkish Cypriots are the exception rather than the rule and to use them as a benchmark is consequently foolish.

[Peter]

That wasn't my point. My point was that Turkish Cypriots are the exception rather than the rule and to use them as a benchmark is consequently foolish.

So those that don't fit your criteria are the exception rather than the rule?

[Monty92]

I thought I told you to go and talk to some muslims? What are you still doing here?

Hhhhhactually, I grew up (till I was 25) in an area with a huge Muslim community, also yer Bangladeshis and Pakistanis primarily.

I didn't always live among the Hampstead glitterati, you know.

[SWv2]

Hhhhhactually, I grew up (till I was 25) in an area with a huge Muslim community, also yer Bangladeshis and Pakistanis primarily.

I didn't always live among the Hampstead glitterati, you know.

I do think you and Pedro should just proceed to oiling up and bum doing each other.

The ongoing tension between you is ridiculous.

[Pokster]

I do think you and Pedro should just proceed to oiling up and bum doing each other.

The ongoing tension between you is ridiculous.

And ****ing boring

[Sir C]

And ****ing boring

I think it's interesting and informative reading the differing opinions of two such erudite, thoughtful young men.

When did you last thrill us with some original thinking, p?

[Burney]

So those that don't fit your criteria are the exception rather than the rule?

You took a small, largely secular, historically and geographically anomalous group - many of whom would barely be recognised as Muslim by their co-religionists - and held them up as exemplars of how well Islam and the modern world can work together. That was, to say the least, disingenuous of you. I was simply pointing out that disingenuousness.

[Pokster]

I think it's interesting and informative reading the differing opinions of two such erudite, thoughtful young men.

When did you last thrill us with some original thinking, p?

I have no problem with differing opinions.... the problem i have is that they repeat their differences every week or so and use the same reasoning each time.

I'm a sheep sir C, why be original when i can just hang on to the coat tails or whatever I choose

[Peter]

I do think you and Pedro should just proceed to oiling up and bum doing each other.

The ongoing tension between you is ridiculous.

I have tried to shut this down. The lad monty is like a dog with a ****ing bone.

[Pokster]

I have tried to shut this down. The lad monty is like a dog with a ****ing bone.

I think he has the bone for you though p

[Sir C]

I have no problem with differing opinions.... the problem i have is that they repeat their differences every week or so and use the same reasoning each time.

I'm a sheep sir C, why be original when i can just hang on to the coat tails or whatever I choose

A shoop? Is that northern for gimp?

Have you seen that docuemntary series about the Lakes and the Yorkshire Dales? It's been lovely, but I'm convinced it's narrated by thon professional Yorkshireman wossname, Mike Harding, but the credits disagree.

Mike Harding. Whatever happened to Mike Harding?

[Pokster]

A shoop? Is that northern for gimp?

Have you seen that docuemntary series about the Lakes and the Yorkshire Dales? It's been lovely, but I'm convinced it's narrated by thon professional Yorkshireman wossname, Mike Harding, but the credits disagree.

Mike Harding. Whatever happened to Mike Harding?

No not seen it.... I saw Mike Harding in concert about 35 years ago :old:

[Peter]

You took a small, largely secular, historically and geographically anomalous group - many of whom would barely be recognised as Muslim by their co-religionists - and held them up as exemplars of how well Islam and the modern world can work together. That was, to say the least, disingenuous of you. I was simply pointing out that disingenuousness.


No, I didnt. As I said, the far larger muslim communities were pakistani and bangladeshi. The Turkish Cypriots barely registered. So that is neither fair nor accurate.

I could accuse you of using Bradford as an equally extreme example of how muslims cant integrate. Its pretty much the other end of the spectrum from Palmers Green.

[Peter]

I think he has the bone for you though p

He has always had an issue with me, going right back to the late 90s. I wouldn't put it down to any sexual desire as that would be rather homophobic. Anyway, the lad has kids, he cant be a shirtlifter.

[Peter]

You took a small, largely secular, historically and geographically anomalous group - many of whom would barely be recognised as Muslim by their co-religionists - and held them up as exemplars of how well Islam and the modern world can work together. That was, to say the least, disingenuous of you. I was simply pointing out that disingenuousness.

Interestingly, the total muslim population of enfield, barnet and haringey combined is roughly the same as the muslim population in Bradford. Although that is according to the 2011 census. I assume they have at least doubled since then.

[Peter]

I think it's interesting and informative reading the differing opinions of two such erudite, thoughtful young men.

When did you last thrill us with some original thinking, p?

I stopped being young quite some time ago.

[Burney]

No, I didnt. As I said, the far larger muslim communities were pakistani and bangladeshi. The Turkish Cypriots barely registered. So that is neither fair nor accurate.

I could accuse you of using Bradford as an equally extreme example of how muslims cant integrate. Its pretty much the other end of the spectrum from Palmers Green.

For Bradford, read Tower Hamets, Rotherham, Oxford, Luton, Rochdale, Leicester, etc, etc.

For Palmers Green read...Palmers Green.

That's the difference.

[Sir C]

I stopped being young quite some time ago.

Also I guess the thinking stopped when your brain was replaced by a liberal groupthink mush?

[Peter]

Also I guess the thinking stopped when your brain was replaced by a liberal groupthink mush?

Before that it was alll druggy bull**** and Dylan lyrics anyway. THinking has never been my strength.

[Sir C]

Before that it was alll druggy bull**** and Dylan lyrics anyway. THinking has never been my strength.

Druggy bull**** :cloud9:

[Peter]

For Bradford, read Tower Hamets, Rotherham, Oxford, Luton, Rochdale, Leicester, etc, etc.

For Palmers Green read...Palmers Green.

That's the difference.

At first glance they appear to all be ****holes (apart from Oxford, perhaps).

Pardon me and my brothers for knowing how to get along with people. You must hate us.

[redgunamo]

At first glance they appear to all be ****holes (apart from Oxford, perhaps).

Pardon me and my brothers for knowing how to get along with people. You must hate us.

Oh, parts of Oxford are certainly like that.

[Viva Prat Vegas]

He has always had an issue with me, going right back to the late 90s. I wouldn't put it down to any sexual desire as that would be rather homophobic. Anyway, the lad has kids, he cant be a shirtlifter.

Paul OGrady has a kid
Somehow

[Pat Vegas]

For Bradford, read Tower Hamets, Rotherham, Oxford, Luton, Rochdale, Leicester, etc, etc.

For Palmers Green read...Palmers Green.

That's the difference.

I am a bit confused with this Palmers Green stuff.

[Peter]

I am a bit confused with this Palmers Green stuff.

Its the only place in the UK with nice Muslims, apparently.

[SWv2]

Its the only place in the UK with nice Muslims, apparently.

Perhaps they are also Liberals.

[Peter]

Perhaps they are also Liberals.

Labour actually, after the last election. They elected a Greek Cypriot as MP :D

[Burney]

Its the only place in the UK with nice Muslims, apparently.

Who said they were nice? Thryre simply less religiously observant and less politically radicalised.

[Pat Vegas]

Its the only place in the UK with nice Muslims, apparently.

Hmmm, must be the turks.
There i still a strong Greek community perhaps not as obvious as before.

However it's changing and I want to leave. It's becoming overly expensive and lots of questionable eastern europe types have moved in.

For instance there is a neighbour who has a bunch of kids has an old woman living with him.
The fella doesn't speak a word of a the queens, must be some sort of tradesman as he has hands of leather, Yet he can rent out a big place and support everyone else :sherlock: and has a newish different car every month. I want to know what his gig is.

[SWv2]

Hmmm, must be the turks.
There i still a strong Greek community perhaps not as obvious as before.

However it's changing and I want to leave. It's becoming overly expensive and lots of questionable eastern europe types have moved in.

For instance there is a neighbour who has a bunch of kids has an old woman living with him.
The fella doesn't speak a word of a the queens, must be some sort of tradesman as he has hands of leather, Yet he can rent out a big place and support everyone else :sherlock: and has a newish different car every month. I want to know what his gig is.

Brexit will sort this out, he will straight back on the boat to wherever.

[Peter]

Hmmm, must be the turks.
There i still a strong Greek community perhaps not as obvious as before.

However it's changing and I want to leave. It's becoming overly expensive and lots of questionable eastern europe types have moved in.

For instance there is a neighbour who has a bunch of kids has an old woman living with him.
The fella doesn't speak a word of a the queens, must be some sort of tradesman as he has hands of leather, Yet he can rent out a big place and support everyone else :sherlock: and has a newish different car every month. I want to know what his gig is.

It has changed considerably, but then that is the nature of the area. I wouldn't necessarily want to live there now and it is absurdly expensive.

The greeks began moving out to Southgate, Oakwood, Cockfosters some time ago. Its all about property for them.