Now even the Allan women have gone all stabby.

[Sir C]

Ramadan has made everyone so tetchy.

[Pat Vegas]

I'm a bit like that. For example if I am out shopping and feel a bit hungry my wife better to get me something to eat before I go mental.

[Alberto Balsam Rodriguez]

Ramadan has made everyone so tetchy.

I think the term you are looking for is "hangry"

[Burney]

Ramadan has made everyone so tetchy.

Yes. Stabbing a nursery nurse while banging on about Allah. I'm sure it's nothing to do with Islam or terrorism, though.

Buggers up the 'toxic masculinity' thing a bit, mind.

[Monty92]

Yes. Stabbing a nursery nurse while banging on about Allah. I'm sure it's nothing to do with Islam or terrorism, though.

Buggers up the 'toxic masculinity' thing a bit, mind.

What's this?

[Burney]

What's this?

http://www.standard.co.uk/news/london/wanstead-nursery-worker-beaten-and-stabbed-by-three-women-shouting-about-allah-a3559251.html

[Pat Vegas]

http://www.standard.co.uk/news/london/wanstead-nursery-worker-beaten-and-stabbed-by-three-women-shouting-about-allah-a3559251.html

I prefer the BBC version
'Nursery manager Karrien Stevens said the woman told her she was slashed by three Asian women dressed in black.'

[Burney]

I prefer the BBC version
'Nursery manager Karrien Stevens said the woman told her she was slashed by three Asian women dressed in black.'

Yeah. No agenda from the beeb there, then. :rolleyes:

[Pat Vegas]

Yeah. No agenda from the beeb there, then. :rolleyes:

:hehe: but they add that the "The Met's Counter Terrorism Command has been made aware of the incident but is not investigating at this time."

why would they mention that? :hehe: Fill in the blanks.

[Burney]

:hehe: but they add that the "The Met's Counter Terrorism Command has been made aware of the incident but is not investigating at this time."

why would they mention that? :hehe: Fill in the blanks.

Well here's the thing, you see? Is it terrorism? Is it a hate crime? From what we can see, it would seem to me to be both.

There is also the minor issue of how we are supposed to identify the assailants if they were all dressed head to toe in black and had their faces covered? But that's a whole other can of worms.

[Rich]

Well here's the thing, you see? Is it terrorism? Is it a hate crime? From what we can see, it would seem to me to be both.

There is also the minor issue of how we are supposed to identify the assailants if they were all dressed head to toe in black and had their faces covered? But that's a whole other can of worms.

Raid the homes of every burkah clad woman in the area and take said burkahs for forensic testing.

[Pat Vegas]

Well here's the thing, you see? Is it terrorism? Is it a hate crime? From what we can see, it would seem to me to be both.

There is also the minor issue of how we are supposed to identify the assailants if they were all dressed head to toe in black and had their faces covered? But that's a whole other can of worms.

These terrorists are winning as I am beginning to get extremely angry. Carry on with your life they say. But get ready to hide and go about your business being a sitting duck ready to be killed whilst you have nothing to protect yourself with.

[Viva Prat Vegas]

These terrorists are winning as I am beginning to get extremely angry. Carry on with your life they say. But get ready to hide.

Run and Report they say

:shout:

[Pat Vegas]

Run and Report they say

:angry:

Dear Mr Vegas thanks for reporting this. We have been watching him for a many years now. carry on with your life now.

[Viva Prat Vegas]

Dear Mr Vegas thanks for reporting this. We have been watching him for a many years now. carry on with your life now.

Tell them the joke about the Indians and see if they want to talk to you about it

[Rich]

Dear Mr Vegas thanks for reporting this. We have been watching him for a many years now. carry on with your life now.

Hide? You need to go steaming in whirling your fists, Fash.

[Viva Prat Vegas]

Hide? You need to go steaming in whirling your fists, Fash.

Fash is not a Hannah Barbara cartoon

[Burney]

These terrorists are winning as I am beginning to get extremely angry. Carry on with your life they say. But get ready to hide and go about your business being a sitting duck ready to be killed whilst you have nothing to protect yourself with.

Anger is good, f. Embrace your anger. Come to the dark side.

[Pat Vegas]

Hide? You need to go steaming in whirling your fists, Fash.

Well last night I got on the tube. and now I am watching everyone (more than usual)

Nervous fella gets on next to me fits the profile, big beard, backpack, :-( now I am thinking right if he moves suddenly crack him as hard as you can. This is a very sad way of thinking, Knowing my luck he'd be taking his phone out of his pocket I'd hit him and he'll die and I go to prison for life.

[Pat Vegas]

Fash is not a Hannah Barbara cartoon

:hehe: though someone said I run like Shaggy. Zoinks.

[Burney]

Well last night I got on the tube. and now I am watching everyone (more than usual)

Nervous fella gets on next to me fits the profile, big beard, backpack, :-( now I am thinking right if he moves suddenly crack him as hard as you can. This is a very sad way of thinking, Knowing my luck he'd be taking his phone out of his pocket I'd hit him and he'll die and I go to prison for life.

Not a jury in the land would convict you, f. The man is guilty of Allan-ing in a built up area and deserves anything he gets. :judge:

[Pat Vegas]

Not a jury in the land would convict you, f. The man is guilty of Allan-ing in a built up area and deserves anything he gets. :judge:

I did wonder if say there was an attack and you happened to have say some sort of illegal weapon on your person and used it to stop an attack what would happen to you.

[Viva Prat Vegas]

Not a jury in the land would convict you, f. The man is guilty of Allan-ing in a built up area and deserves anything he gets. :judge:

We will all take a day off from AWIMB to hear the case and offer evidence
And then wave goodbye as they take him back down to the cells

[Ash]

Well last night I got on the tube. and now I am watching everyone (more than usual)


I used to feel that commuting on foot was safer than the tube. Not any more. Every van or car moving at some speed is now a suspect, and I find myself quickly looking for escape routes in case it mounts the pavement. :-(

[Viva Prat Vegas]

I used to feel that commuting on foot was safer than the tube. Not any more. Every van or car moving at some speed is now a suspect, and I find myself quickly looking for escape routes in case it mounts the pavement. :-(

Your mum mounts the pavement

[Pat Vegas]

I used to feel that commuting on foot was safer than the tube. Not any more. Every van or car moving at some speed is now a suspect, and I find myself quickly looking for escape routes in case it mounts the pavement. :-(

:nod: I was thinking the same. I get on at Bank during rush hour and you are packed in no change. then I thought I could walk to Moorgate but that's dangerous too.

I am calling for a ban on people who speed or rev up their engines in these areas. like certain motorbikes. I will also ban running and general shouting,

[Ash]

:nod: I was thinking the same. I get on at Bank during rush hour and you are packed in no change. then I thought I could walk to Moorgate but that's dangerous too.

I am calling for a ban on people who speed or rev up their engines in these areas. like certain motorbikes. I will also ban running and general shouting,

The more dense the crowd, the safer you should be from a bermb as all the people around the epicentre absorb the blast and shrapnel. Get a nice big, fat person between you and the bomber and you should be in with a chance. So I've been told.

[Pat Vegas]

The more dense the crowd, the safer you should be from a bermb as all the people around the epicentre absorb the blast and shrapnel. Get a nice big, fat person between you and the bomber and you should be in with a chance. So I've been told.

I was thinking of wearing my leather jacket it may be a bit more stab proof.
it's going to be a bit of a nightmare during the summer.

You know what could be a handy weapon. is a heavy duty torch. they are designed with boffing someone on head in mind,

[Viva Prat Vegas]

The more dense the crowd, the safer you should be from a bermb as all the people around the epicentre absorb the blast and shrapnel. Get a nice big, fat person between you and the bomber and you should be in with a chance. So I've been told.

The answer is to move to the countryside
Solved

[Burney]

The more dense the crowd, the safer you should be from a bermb as all the people around the epicentre absorb the blast and shrapnel. Get a nice big, fat person between you and the bomber and you should be in with a chance. So I've been told.

Yes. I saw some girl Instagrammed pics from the Manchester bomb complaining that her white dress and fancy handbag were covered with blood and faeces (almost certainly the bomber's). You had to laugh, really.

[Viva Prat Vegas]

Yes. I saw some girl Instagrammed pics from the Manchester bomb complaining that her white dress and fancy handbag were covered with blood and faeces (almost certainly the bomber's). You had to laugh, really.

Complaining ?
Some people do not know they are born

[Burney]

Complaining ?
Some people do not know they are born

To be fair, it would irritate one more than somewhat to get covered in blood and sh1t, I suppose. :shrug:

[Viva Prat Vegas]

To be fair, it would irritate one more than somewhat to get covered in blood and sh1t, I suppose. :shrug:

Not so bad if it is your own blood and sh1t

Someone elses ?
Disgusting

[Viva Prat Vegas]

To be fair, it would irritate one more than somewhat to get covered in blood and sh1t, I suppose. :shrug:

Speaking of sh1t I just knocked my glass of water over
:furious:

[Rich]

I used to feel that commuting on foot was safer than the tube. Not any more. Every van or car moving at some speed is now a suspect, and I find myself quickly looking for escape routes in case it mounts the pavement. :-(

Don't walk across bridges on pavements. Instead, walk along the top of the bridge edges (not sure what the real name for them is - a bridge enthusiast may be able to enlighten me).

[Sir C]

Don't walk across bridges on pavements. Instead, walk along the top of the bridge edges (not sure what the real name for them is - a bridge enthusiast may be able to enlighten me).

I've got to have operations on my shoulders because of you.

Will it hurt?

[Burney]

Don't walk across bridges on pavements. Instead, walk along the top of the bridge edges (not sure what the real name for them is - a bridge enthusiast may be able to enlighten me).

Parapets, I think.

[Burney]

Speaking of sh1t I just knocked my glass of water over
:furious:

:-( I'm lighting a tea light and holding a vigil for you.

[Pat Vegas]

Don't walk across bridges on pavements. Instead, walk along the top of the bridge edges (not sure what the real name for them is - a bridge enthusiast may be able to enlighten me).

In this climate doing that may get you shot.

[Rich]

I've got to have operations on my shoulders because of you.

Will it hurt?

Hang on, why am I shouldering (sorry) the blame here?

Probably.

[Pat Vegas]

Hang on, why am I shouldering (sorry) the blame here?

Probably.

You want Sir C to start swing around on bridges? what do you think he is some sort of Trapezius?

[Sir C]

Hang on, why am I shouldering (sorry) the blame here?

Probably.

Because you failed to diagnose torn rotator cuff wossnames in time for physiotherapy to mend them.

[Pat Vegas]

Because you failed to diagnose torn rotator cuff wossnames in time for physiotherapy to mend them.

But Sir C that sounds so American. Next you'll be telling me you have mono

[Burney]

Because you failed to diagnose torn rotator cuff wossnames in time for physiotherapy to mend them.

In fairness, Rich and I diagnosed dem fings on the first day you mentioned them. It's not our fault you failed to present early enough with your symptoms.

[Burney]

But Sir C that sounds so American. Next you'll be telling me you have mono

I'm sure Sir C is mortified that he's been walking around with torn cuffs. His tailor would never speak to him again if he knew. :-(

[Sir C]

In fairness, Rich and I diagnosed dem fings on the first day you mentioned them. It's not our fault you failed to present early enough with your symptoms.

In other words, "I told you so?"

[Viva Prat Vegas]

Because you failed to diagnose torn rotator cuff wossnames in time for physiotherapy to mend them.

Perhaps Rich can also inject some life into your torn todger
Todger
Shoulders
Sh1t teeth ?

[Pat Vegas]

I'm sure Sir C is mortified that he's been walking around with torn cuffs. His tailor would never speak to him again if he knew. :-(

:-( Nobody liked my Trapezius pun either.

[Sir C]

Perhaps Rich can also inject some life into your torn todger
Todger
Shoulders
Sh1t teeth ?

Teeth are ok but there's still something wrong in my head and I'm wobbling around and occasionally falling over. I was due to see a specialist on Monday but he has been admitted to hospital, the non-self-healing physician ****.

[Burney]

In other words, "I told you so?"

Not at all. However, speaking as a physician*, I believe it's important always to establish that it's the patient's fault when anything goes wrong.





*Possibly not strictly true

[Sir C]

:-( Nobody liked my Trapezius pun either.

Look mate, if you had my shoulders you'd understand why I don't wish to think about swinging from anything :-(

[Pat Vegas]

Look mate, if you had my shoulders you'd understand why I don't wish to think about swinging from anything :-(

Some Pete Townshend style windmill strumming will sort it.