WFH today, just sank the third pint of real ale at my local

[World's End Stella]

Along with a bacon and avocado sandwich and chips.

The odds that Friday afternoon doesn't involve a visit to the couch? Precisely f*cking zero.

Afternoon naps on the couch post pub lunch :cloud9:

[Sir C]

Along with a bacon and avocado sandwich and chips.

The odds that Friday afternoon doesn't involve a visit to the couch? Precisely f*cking zero.

Afternoon naps on the couch post pub lunch :cloud9:

Bacon and avocado? What sort of boozer is this?

[Burney]

Along with a bacon and avocado sandwich and chips.

The odds that Friday afternoon doesn't involve a visit to the couch? Precisely f*cking zero.

Afternoon naps on the couch post pub lunch :cloud9:

Avocado? Bender!

[Monty92]

Along with a bacon and avocado sandwich and chips.

The odds that Friday afternoon doesn't involve a visit to the couch? Precisely f*cking zero.

Afternoon naps on the couch post pub lunch :cloud9:

Been self-employed for the past couple of months. Went to the cinema yesterday at 10am and had the whole place to myself :cloud9:

Not been to the pub yet. That seems rather indulgent.

[Pokster]

Bacon and avocado? What sort of boozer is this?

If I remember correctly his local village boozer does serve very nice grub... it was about 15 yrs ago since i went there though (it's in Surrey so not a "proper" boozer)

[Monty92]

Avocado? Bender!

:nod: Possibly the only food gayer than courgette and kiwi fruit.

[Monty92]

Bacon and avocado? What sort of boozer is this?

How was your chinky?

Jamavar in Mayfair for me tonight.

[Sir C]

How was your chinky?

Jamavar in Mayfair for me tonight.

Bit meh, tbh.

Owned by the Leela Palace group, I see. I've stayed in a few in India. Quite tremendously vulgar. You might be in for gilding and flock wallpaper.

[Burney]

Been self-employed for the past couple of months. Went to the cinema yesterday at 10am and had the whole place to myself :cloud9:

Not been to the pub yet. That seems rather indulgent.

Going to the cinema alone makes you a pervert, I'm afraid. I don't make the rules. :shrug:

A couple of pints one one's own while doing the crossword, however, is exactly what a proper chap ought to be doing of a lunchtime.

[Burney]

:nod: Possibly the only food gayer than courgette and kiwi fruit.

Only acceptable in guacamole form, I'm afraid.

[Monty92]

Bit meh, tbh.

Owned by the Leela Palace group, I see. I've stayed in a few in India. Quite tremendously vulgar. You might be in for gilding and flock wallpaper.

Yes, I'm expecting vulgarity, but it's a special occasion as the missus has finished her maternity leave so a dash of kitsch is called for.

I have flowers and chocolates waiting for her at home too.

I reckon I've raised my chances of getting laid this weekend by at least 5%.

[World's End Stella]

Avocado? Bender!

It's 2017, Burney, time to move on. My local is positively old skool compared to most pubs nowadays, not a veloute, purée or foam anywhere in sight.

The lad had gammon on white bread with lashings of Coleman's mustard, if that helps. Proof below:

http://www.redlionshamleygreen.com

[Sir C]

Going to the cinema alone makes you a pervert, I'm afraid. I don't make the rules. :shrug:

A couple of pints one one's own while doing the crossword, however, is exactly what a proper chap ought to be doing of a lunchtime.

:nod: Like Morse.

Hold on: a bit crotchety, real ale enthusiast, a tendency to didacticism? That's why you don't like Morse, man! The pair of you were separated at birth for fúcks sake!

[Sir C]

Yes, I'm expecting vulgarity, but it's a special occasion as the missus has finished her maternity leave so a dash of kitsch is called for.

I have flowers and chocolates waiting for her at home too.

I reckon I've raised my chances of getting laid this weekend by at least 5%.

Please accept my best wishes for you both in this endeavour.

Make sure you don't make another baby happen though.

[Burney]

It's 2017, Burney, time to move on. My local is positively old skool compared to most pubs nowadays, not a veloute, purée or foam anywhere in sight.

The lad had gammon on white bread with lashings of Coleman's mustard, if that helps. Proof below:

http://www.redlionshamleygreen.com

Oh, I know the place. But avocado is unacceptable, I'm afraid. It's a foodstuff that ought only to be consumed by middle-class women, bufties and Mexicans. It certainly has no place alongside God's honest bacon.

[Burney]

Please accept my best wishes for you both in this endeavour.

Make sure you don't make another baby happen though.

Good luck, m. You're probably a bit rusty, I imagine. Can you remember how it all works? Do you want us to talk you through things?

[Burney]

:nod: Like Morse.

Hold on: a bit crotchety, real ale enthusiast, a tendency to didacticism? That's why you don't like Morse, man! The pair of you were separated at birth for fúcks sake!

I don't have a limp. :-(

[Monty92]

Good luck, m. You're probably a bit rusty, I imagine. Can you remember how it all works? Do you want us to talk you through things?

:-( I'm hoping muscle memory will kick in.

[Burney]

:-( I'm hoping muscle memory will kick in.

Well try not to blow your load too soon. :-( At least try make sure you actually get it into her, first.

[Pokster]

It's 2017, Burney, time to move on. My local is positively old skool compared to most pubs nowadays, not a veloute, purée or foam anywhere in sight.

The lad had gammon on white bread with lashings of Coleman's mustard, if that helps. Proof below:

http://www.redlionshamleygreen.com

That's the one... been there a couiple of times with some of my ex's friends.... bought a place in your village after appearing on Location, location,location

[Monty92]

Well try not to blow your load too soon. :-( At least try make sure you actually get it into her, first.

I've been reliably informed that stamina is the last thing a permanently knackered new mum wants from her sexual partner :-\

[Burney]

I've been reliably informed that stamina is the last thing a permanently knackered new mum wants from her sexual partner :-\

Oh. Oh, dear. I can only too easily imagine the circumstances in which she told you that. :-(

[Pokster]

Oh. Oh, dear. I can only too easily imagine the circumstances in which she told you that. :-(

Just after she came home after being shagged by her new bloke imo

[Sir C]

I've been reliably informed that stamina is the last thing a permanently knackered new mum wants from her sexual partner :-\

Has her, you know, thingy recovered from the trauma of exuding a fully formed human being? :-(

[Ash]

just sank the third pint of real ale at my local

How does anyone manage to do any work after three pints at lunchtime?

[World's End Stella]

Oh, I know the place. But avocado is unacceptable, I'm afraid. It's a foodstuff that ought only to be consumed by middle-class women, bufties and Mexicans. It certainly has no place alongside God's honest bacon.

Regardless of all that dogmatic nonsense, bacon and avocado tastes really good, Burney. And even with avocado on the menu my local is still a proper boozer.

The couch awaits.

[World's End Stella]

How does anyone manage to do any work after three pints at lunchtime?

I don't :shrug:

[Luis Anaconda]

Bacon and avocado? What sort of boozer is this?

WHY DOES THE BAD MAN SAY SUCH THINGS, SIR C?

I might have to start drinking now

[Luis Anaconda]

How does anyone manage to do any work after three pints at lunchtime?

How does anyone get anything done with three pints at lunchtime?

[World's End Stella]

Has her, you know, thingy recovered from the trauma of exuding a fully formed human being? :-(

On this topic, Mrs WES has delivered two of said things and I can assure you, Charles, that her front bottom is fully up to scratch.

Evolution has made them quite recoverable in that regard.

[71 Guns - channeling the spirit of Mr Hat]

How does anyone manage to do any work after three pints at lunchtime?
Probably Spitfire or other weak shít.

[Pat Vegas]

Along with a bacon and avocado sandwich and chips.

The odds that Friday afternoon doesn't involve a visit to the couch? Precisely f*cking zero.

Afternoon naps on the couch post pub lunch :cloud9:

The leafs might make the playoffs :cloud9:

Though I can't help but feel they are a bit like the Tottenham Hotspur of the NHL.

[Pat Vegas]

Going to the cinema alone makes you a pervert, I'm afraid. I don't make the rules. :shrug:

A couple of pints one one's own while doing the crossword, however, is exactly what a proper chap ought to be doing of a lunchtime.

I think it's far more enjoyable on your own.
For starters i don't have to keep telling my wife to be quiet.

[Sir C]

On this topic, Mrs WES has delivered two of said things and I can assure you, Charles, that her front bottom is fully up to scratch.

Evolution has made them quite recoverable in that regard.

Yes, but remember, he's only got a teeny weeny winkie.

It'll be a miracle if he touches the sides.

[Sir C]

WHY DOES THE BAD MAN SAY SUCH THINGS, SIR C?

I might have to start drinking now

Have some more livercheese. That's what you need.

[World's End Stella]

Probably Spitfire or other weak shít.

Atlantic - from some brewery in some ****hole called Cornwall :-)

[Burney]

I think it's far more enjoyable on your own.
For starters i don't have to keep telling my wife to be quiet.

I feel much the same about sex these days, to be honest.

[Burney]

Have some more livercheese. That's what you need.

They really do have zero aesthetic sensibility when it comes to language, your krauts, don't they? Livercheese, ffs!

[71 Guns - channeling the spirit of Mr Hat]

Atlantic - from some brewery in some ****hole called Cornwall :-)

Oh I say. What a very good choice sirrah. Lovely stuff. Bastárd. :D

[Luis Anaconda]

They really do have zero aesthetic sensibility when it comes to language, your krauts, don't they? Livercheese, ffs!

Oh god yes - ridicules language, b. I was being taught Bavarian last night -jesus wept

[Sir C]

They really do have zero aesthetic sensibility when it comes to language, your krauts, don't they? Livercheese, ffs!

And consider how simple it would be to mispronounce it Lieberkáse :-(

I don't want to think about eating lovecheese.

[Ash]

Probably Spitfire or other weak shít.

Oi! I like Spitfire. :fight:

Partly because it's the cheapest bottled ale I can get in my local shops, tbf, but it's still a tasty treat compared to the canned lager I usually neck of an evening.

Anyway, it's 4.5% compared to 4.3% for yer Doom Bar there by the bottle, so not especially weak. :vsign:

I had to type my date of birth into TWO beer-producer websites to check that info. There's absolutely no way a minor would be able to get round that is there. No sirree bob. It's the nanny state gone mad, I tell thee.

[Burney]

Oh I say. What a very good choice sirrah. Lovely stuff. Bastárd. :D

Sharps isn't it? From the Rock brewery? I think I prefer it to Doom Bar, which is quite a compliment.

[Burney]

And consider how simple it would be to mispronounce it Lieberkáse :-(

I don't want to think about eating lovecheese.

Not again, anyway.

[Burney]

Oi! I like Spitfire. :fight:

Partly because it's the cheapest bottled ale I can get in my local shops, tbf, but it's still a tasty treat compared to the canned lager I usually neck of an evening.

Anyway, it's 4.5% compared to 4.3% for yer Doom Bar there by the bottle, so not especially weak. :vsign:

I had to type my date of birth into TWO beer-producer websites to check that info. There's absolutely no way a minor would be able to get round that is there. No sirree bob. It's the nanny state gone mad, I tell thee.

I buy that Banks' Bitter they sell in Tesco for 89p per bottle. It's perfectly drinkable and half the price of all the other beers for reasons I can't really explain. They try to put you off it by putting 'Great with Fish' bizarrely on the shelf underneath it, but pay not attention to that.

[Ash]

Sharps isn't it? From the Rock brewery? I think I prefer it to Doom Bar, which is quite a compliment.

Pale Ale :-(

Now I like grapefruit, but I don't want my beer to taste of it, if your don't mind. There's a reason why loads of hop preservatives were put into beer en-route to India, and it wasn't for the flavour AIUI.

[Ash]

I buy that Banks' Bitter they sell in Tesco for 89p per bottle. It's perfectly drinkable and half the price of all the other beers for reasons I can't really explain. They try to put you off it by putting 'Great with Fish' bizarrely on the shelf underneath it, but pay not attention to that.

A Midland beer :cloud9: I shall look out for that. I'm not sure any beer is good with fish, is it? Except maybe fish & chips.

[71 Guns - channeling the spirit of Mr Hat]

Sharps isn't it? From the Rock brewery? I think I prefer it to Doom Bar, which is quite a compliment.
:nod: It's one of my current favourites. Slightly better on draft but bottles will suffice.

[71 Guns - channeling the spirit of Mr Hat]

Oi! I like Spitfire. :fight:



So do I really but it can be a bit bland :shrug: although when it's on offer for £1 a bottle I'll happily buy 12.

[Ash]

So do I really but it can be a bit bland :shrug: although when it's on offer for £1 a bottle I'll happily buy 12.

Who does that offer?

[Luis Anaconda]

Who does that offer?

How can a beer for one pound constitute being on offer ffs

89 cents is the most I would pay and that's for the good stuff

[Ash]

How can a beer for one pound constitute being on offer ffs

89 cents is the most I would pay and that's for the good stuff

Good Lord. Is it subsidised over there or something? Or just not taxed to the eyeballs?

[World's End Stella]

Oi! I like Spitfire. :fight:

Partly because it's the cheapest bottled ale I can get in my local shops, tbf, but it's still a tasty treat compared to the canned lager I usually neck of an evening.

Anyway, it's 4.5% compared to 4.3% for yer Doom Bar there by the bottle, so not especially weak. :vsign:

I had to type my date of birth into TWO beer-producer websites to check that info. There's absolutely no way a minor would be able to get round that is there. No sirree bob. It's the nanny state gone mad, I tell thee.

Spitfire is a bit meh. It tastes a bit like Doombar, sadly, and as we all know, Doombar is vile.

[World's End Stella]

Sharps isn't it? From the Rock brewery? I think I prefer it to Doom Bar, which is quite a compliment.

:nod: A truly exceptional pint, very hoppy, nothing like Doombar funnily enough.

[71 Guns - channeling the spirit of Mr Hat]

Who does that offer?
Morrison's. On a regular basis. Do you have them in London village?

[Ash]

Morrison's. On a regular basis. Do you have them in London village?

Why, yes! My nearest is just yards from Ashburton Grove itself. I shall investigate, and thanks for the tip :thumbup:

[Ash]

:nod: A truly exceptional pint, very hoppy, nothing like Doombar funnily enough.

Tastes of grapefruit then.

[World's End Stella]

Tastes of grapefruit then.

Your grapefruit tastes very different from mine, Ash.