I've boobed in a most naive fashion.

[Sir C]

My FD is off sick. Usually when she's on holiday I use her special box of tricks and passwords and shít top access the bank and pay the bills and that. Yesterday I couldn't log in so, with the innocence of a child, I called the bank for help.

The bloke nearly shít himself. "You've been using someone else's log in? Terms and conditions! Fraud! Aaaaarggh!" Over-excitable ****.

Now I can't pay anyone, so touch fúcking shít if we owe you money.

[Burney]

My FD is off sick. Usually when she's on holiday I use her special box of tricks and passwords and shít top access the bank and pay the bills and that. Yesterday I couldn't log in so, with the innocence of a child, I called the bank for help.

The bloke nearly shít himself. "You've been using someone else's log in? Terms and conditions! Fraud! Aaaaarggh!" Over-excitable ****.

Now I can't pay anyone, so touch fúcking shít if we owe you money.

That'll be you getting an audit in the New Year, then. :-(

[Pat Vegas]

My FD is off sick. Usually when she's on holiday I use her special box of tricks and passwords and shít top access the bank and pay the bills and that. Yesterday I couldn't log in so, with the innocence of a child, I called the bank for help.

The bloke nearly shít himself. "You've been using someone else's log in? Terms and conditions! Fraud! Aaaaarggh!" Over-excitable ****.

Now I can't pay anyone, so touch fúcking shít if we owe you money.

You'll have to pop down to the Money shop.

[Sir C]

That'll be you getting an audit in the New Year, then. :-(

An audit? From the bank? :hehe: The bank can go fúck themselves. Jumped-up beancounting tóssers. Those fánnies do what I tell them, not vice versa.

[Burney]

An audit? From the bank? :hehe: The bank can go fúck themselves. Jumped-up beancounting tóssers. Those fánnies do what I tell them, not vice versa.

No. They'll pass on this information to THE MAN and he'll come and squeeze your teste-satchel in an eye-watering fashion.

[Pat Vegas]

An audit? From the bank? :hehe: The bank can go fúck themselves. Jumped-up beancounting tóssers. Those fánnies do what I tell them, not vice versa.

I don't understand their reaction. Having multiple people using this sort of thing isn't that uncommon.

What if your FD leaves? You have to open a new account? You have encountered a jobsworth.

[Sir C]

No. They'll pass on this information to THE MAN and he'll come and squeeze your teste-satchel in an eye-watering fashion.

THE MAN constantly has my sac in a vice, which he tightens half a turn each morning. I'm incapable of feeling any extra pain from the ****.

[Pat Vegas]

THE MAN constantly has my sac in a vice, which he tightens half a turn each morning. I'm incapable of feeling any extra pain from the ****.

Sir C I am very sorry to hear of this. Will you be featured in that gripping television show 'Can't pay we'll take it away' ?

[Sir C]

I don't understand their reaction. Having multiple people using this sort of thing isn't that uncommon.

What if your FD leaves? You have to open a new account? You have encountered a jobsworth.

I think I'm supposed to have my own log in details. I guess so that after all the money has been shipped out to Brazil they can identify who did it. They'll know it was me though, because I'll be the one on the beach in Rio.

[Sir C]

Sir C I am very sorry to hear of this. Will you be featured in that gripping television show 'Can't pay we'll take it away' ?

Perhaps ina new show entitled, 'I'm Just Tired Of Paying This **** Now Please Fúck Off."

[Burney]

Sir C I am very sorry to hear of this. Will you be featured in that gripping television show 'Can't pay we'll take it away' ?

I find it very strange in that how many of the cretins actually let the bailiffs wander into their house.

[Pat Vegas]

I find it very strange in that how many of the cretins actually let the bailiffs wander into their house.

:nod: I also wonder what are the rules regarding the TV crew.
I wouldn't want to feature in such a show.

And they rarely take anything as the people always pay up.