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View Full Version : Going under the knife tomorrow for a hernia op :-(



Monty92
09-06-2016, 01:00 PM
Having recently seen my girlfriend’s stomach ripped open and a life form emerge from it, you’d have thought I’d be hardened (not like that, naughty) to such a routine procedure, but I’ll level with you, I’m leeetle bit scared :-(

Also, should I trim my pubes tonight?

Sir C
09-06-2016, 01:02 PM
Having recently seen my girlfriend’s insides ripped to shred and a life form emerge from them, you’d have thought I’d be hardened (not like that, naughty) to such a routine procedure, but I’ll level with you, I’m leeetle bit scared :-(

Also, should I trim my pubes tonight?

A hernia? That's what common people get from, I don't know, lifting bags of coal, I suppose. :-(

I wonder whether you'll die?

Monty92
09-06-2016, 01:04 PM
A hernia? That's what common people get from, I don't know, lifting bags of coal, I suppose. :-(

I wonder whether you'll die?

I did it lifting an oven, trying to be the big man, when I'm actually just a fey middle class Jew with a few pathetic vanity muscles but **** all actual core strength.

That's what the doctor said, anyway.

Sir C
09-06-2016, 01:07 PM
I did it lifting an oven, trying to be the big man, when I'm actually just a fey middle class Jew with a few pathetic vanity muscles but **** all actual core strength.

That's what the doctor said, anyway.

Apparently you have about a 1 in 100,000 chance of dying under the anaesthetic, but deaths are becoming slightly more common. There is a slightly greater risk of brain damage; but how would anyone know?

Seriously, I wish you the very best of luck. Maybe just a little discomfort for the lols.

World's End Stella
09-06-2016, 01:10 PM
I had an umbilical done a few months back - piece of piss.

One week off work, one week light recuperation, then onto light workouts and by 5 weeks I was back to normal.

They did they shaving for me, after they pumped me full of drugs. Presumably you're going private or is the photo caption writing business a bit slow these days?

Monty92
09-06-2016, 01:14 PM
I had an umbilical done a few months back - piece of piss.

One week off work, one week light recuperation, then onto light workouts and by 5 weeks I was back to normal.

They did they shaving for me, after they pumped me full of drugs. Presumably you're going private or is the photo caption writing business a bit slow these days?

Can I really get a week off work? I'd feel a bit of a bender, to be honest, given that all I do is sit at a ****ing computer all day.

World's End Stella
09-06-2016, 01:17 PM
Can I really get a week off work? I'd feel a bit of a bender, to be honest, given that all I do is sit at a ****ing computer all day.

Depends on if you can work from home, as I did.

You might feel differently when you wake up the next morning and all the drugs have worn off. It was all I could do to get out of bed. That level of pain lasted about 2-3 days only.

They had me on codeine, ibuprofen and paracetamol - gargantuan portions of the stuff. And umbilical is one of the simpler ones, I think.

Burney
09-06-2016, 01:24 PM
Having recently seen my girlfriend’s stomach ripped open and a life form emerge from it, you’d have thought I’d be hardened (not like that, naughty) to such a routine procedure, but I’ll level with you, I’m leeetle bit scared :-(

Also, should I trim my pubes tonight?

The last time an AWIMBer did that, they then posted an x-ray of their cock and then went mental.

Will you be following suit?

Monty92
09-06-2016, 01:24 PM
Depends on if you can work from home, as I did.

You might feel differently when you wake up the next morning and all the drugs have worn off. It was all I could do to get out of bed. That level of pain lasted about 2-3 days only.

They had me on codeine, ibuprofen and paracetamol - gargantuan portions of the stuff. And umbilical is one of the simpler ones, I think.

Oh yeah, forgot about the pain thing. Ah well, at least I can rely on my obedient 2.5 year old to happily forego his morning routine of jumping all over me :-|

Alberto Balsam Rodriguez
09-06-2016, 02:31 PM
Having recently seen my girlfriend’s stomach ripped open and a life form emerge from it, you’d have thought I’d be hardened (not like that, naughty) to such a routine procedure, but I’ll level with you, I’m leeetle bit scared :-(

Also, should I trim my pubes tonight?


Do not trim your pubes. You should be told that you need them shaved and you should be asked whether you would like a male or female nurse to trim them for you. I'm sure you will pick wisely

Blupunter
09-06-2016, 09:14 PM
I had a triple heart bypass in March this year. That's a proper operation.

Jeez...

eastgermanautos
09-07-2016, 02:32 AM
The last time an AWIMBer did that, they then posted an x-ray of their cock and then went mental.

Will you be following suit?

Is there a reference number for this post of yesteryear? Need to see!

eastgermanautos
09-07-2016, 02:35 AM
I did it lifting an oven, trying to be the big man, when I'm actually just a fey middle class Jew with a few pathetic vanity muscles but **** all actual core strength.

That's what the doctor said, anyway.

:hehe: You should've got him with your nunchucks after

eastgermanautos
09-07-2016, 02:36 AM
A hernia? That's what common people get from, I don't know, lifting bags of coal, I suppose. :-(

I wonder whether you'll die?

In fact no. common people know how to lift because they've been doing it for decades.

barrybueno
09-07-2016, 07:15 PM
Lifting his wallet imo, geddit, eh? eh? eh?

Monty92
09-07-2016, 08:13 PM
I had a triple heart bypass in March this year. That's a proper operation.

Jeez...

But that probably means you're morbidly obese, old or both - not to mention northern - and therefore resigned to death being on the cards sooner rather than later. Such an operation, however serious, will hold no fear for you, whereas I am in the pique of health and suffering any kind of physical malady is an alien feeling to me.

Tony C
09-08-2016, 04:56 PM
Good luck with this project Monty! :nurse: