There's gonna be a god damn open casket at the home of my girlfriend’s grandma after

[Monty92]

her funeral ceremony. Put me right off my triangular smoked salmon sandwiches, that will :-(

Reason given by her husband that “it would be nice for her to be in her home for one last time”

She’s dead. She wouldn’t know any different if you stuck her on Nemesis at Alton Towers for one last time.

****ing pseudo-Catholics.

[Luis Anaconda]

her funeral ceremony. Put me right off my triangular smoked salmon sandwiches, that will :-(

Reason given by her husband that “it would be nice for her to be in her home for one last time”

She’s dead. She wouldn’t know any different if you stuck her on Nemesis at Alton Towers for one last time.

****ing pseudo-Catholics.
Surely you have the open-casket thing before the ceremony - that's just weird

[Burney]

Surely you have the open-casket thing before the ceremony - that's just weird

Yeah. That is super-weird. You do the wake, then the funeral, then the committal.

[Monty92]

Surely you have the open-casket thing before the ceremony - that's just weird

She's being cremated so I think the plan is to have some kind of ceremony, then back to the house to stare at a corpse, then the cremation the following day.

I dunno. I've only ever been to a Jewish funeral so this is all unchartered waters for me. Anything else I should know?

[Luis Anaconda]

Yeah. That is super-weird. You do the wake, then the funeral, then the committal.

Then back to the pub

[Burney]

her funeral ceremony. Put me right off my triangular smoked salmon sandwiches, that will :-(

Reason given by her husband that “it would be nice for her to be in her home for one last time”

She’s dead. She wouldn’t know any different if you stuck her on Nemesis at Alton Towers for one last time.

****ing pseudo-Catholics.

Dare you to take a selfie with her.

[Burney]

She's being cremated so I think the plan is to have some kind of ceremony, then back to the house to stare at a corpse, then the cremation the following day.

I dunno. I've only ever been to a Jewish funeral so this is all unchartered waters for me. Anything else I should know?


It's mandatory for family members to kiss the corpse.

[Monty92]

It's mandatory for family members to kiss the corpse.

Really? Like sexy kissing?

[Burney]

Really? Like sexy kissing?

Well since funeral directors use a special device and a needle gun to keep the mouth closed, no. Just a peck is fine.

[Monty92]

Well since funeral directors use a special device and a needle gun to keep the mouth closed, no. Just a peck is fine.

Surely I won't be expected to kiss her? I'm not even married to her granddaughter so I'm barely even family.

[Burney]

Surely I won't be expected to kiss her? I'm not even married to her granddaughter so I'm barely even family.

Of course you will! You're the father of her great-grandkids. :shrug:

You can always just kiss the air just above her face. That's what I did with my granny.

[IUFG]

whooah there!

Shirley not? I wouldn't want to traumatise a child by instructing them to stick a kiss on a cadaver's pallid cheek / forehead.

[Burney]

whooah there!

Shirley not? I wouldn't want to traumatise a child by instructing them to stick a kiss on a cadaver's pallid cheek / forehead.

I was a man full grown when it happened. No big thing.