Right. I've had a cold thing for nearly four weeks now. Started with knock-you-over fluey thing and

[Berni]

has just sort of continued with blocked nose, headache, coughing, phlegm, sore throat ever since - with a particular spike this weekend gone where my temperature shot up again.

My wife wants me to go to the doctor, but I'm fiercely resistant to being the sort of c**t who goes to the doctor because he's got a bit of a sniffle. On the other hand, I'm quite bored with constantly feeling ****e.

So what say you, AWIMB? Tough it out and hope for the best or go and almost certainly be told by some gob****e who's just googled my symptoms to take aspirin and drink plenty of water and no we'll wait a while before prescribing antibiotics, etc, etc?

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

It appears to be a thing.

Other than prescribing antibiotics, which are almost certainly utterly irrelevant to your condition, there is f**k all the doctor can do.

The glw would advise a course of hot lemon, honey and scotch. I prescribe getting over yourself.

[Berni]

producing has been quite spectacular in terms of consistency and colour. You could bounce some of it off the walls.

Still, you're probably right. Best just to get on with it, I suppose. Very annoying to have an illness that drags on like this without garnering one any sympathy imo. At least with the cankers you get sympathy.

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

Cures anything, natural yoghurt.

This morning I had explosive diarrhea and vomiting. The battle continues to rage within.

[Berni]

him prod you in intimate places?

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

I suspect that mixing oysters and mussels in one meal may have been an error, but as there is no crippling pain nor yet evidence of internal bleeding, I shall rely upon my little internal soldiers to overcome the invading army.

[Berni]

Your white corpuscles are as the Glosters on the Imjin River - fighting heroically, but doomed to be swamped by sheer numbers.

[barrybueno]

Man up ffs.