Is Dr Mengele in da house?

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

I bashed my hand against a wall a couple of months ago, and bruised my little finger. It still hurts like buggery. Still! What nonsense is this? Is it possible to bruise a bone?

[71 Guns - channeling the spirit of Mr Hat]

[Classic Jorge]

My daughter broke her finger recently and we all just thought it was a bruise. Then we took her to the hospital a week later to find it was actually fractured.

I'd feel like a terrible parent but all they gave her was a bandage and a splint.

[71 Guns - channeling the spirit of Mr Hat]

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

You mean I've broked my finger? :-(

There's no way I'm going to see one of they nationalised doctors.

[Pat Vegas]

[Classic Jorge]

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

No.

['Neg]

[Classic Jorge]

It's a f**ker, there's nothing you can do about it in most cases and should you avail yourself of a medicine man he'll likely give you f**k all to help it save a bandage and a lolly stick.

Approach a reliable apothecary and request a strong tincture, preferably with poppy extract.

[Pat Vegas]

Could I have 50 pounds?

[Classic Jorge]

Not the former chelsea tripod

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

[7evens]

They'll be carting you off on a tea tray in a few years.

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

Would you take a cheque of would you prefer cash?

[Classic Jorge]

One wonders why it was never more popular in the scotch extremes, really.

Maybe they should deep fry it, or at the very least include a free stanley knife with the jumbo size bottle.

[Curly]

Looking a bit haggard on it he was.
Apparently his daughter banged into the wall in work,came home,ate dinner and went off to bed.Luckily he looked in on her a couple of hours laterand noticed her forearm was f**kING MAHOOSIVE....she had busted a blood vessel/vein in her arm and had massive haemorrhaging.Caught it just in time.
So in answer to your question I think you have a sore finger :thumbup:

[Pat Vegas]

Apart from my secret plan I need to make some space for my latest gimmick of returning to ice hockey.

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

with which I have lived constantly for some 16 weeks, hearing about your barman's daughter's armpits has sorted me right out :thumbup:

[Berni]

crack your finger bones, only for them to heal and then go all hurty again the next time a cricket ball hits them. I myself have several such knobs and bumps on my fingers that I re-damage pretty much every week when I play. They're not big deal, just a bit annoying.

Could be worse: you could be a wicketkeeper :puke:

http://i.imgur.com/B57w4d3.jpg

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

That was from Hawaii.

[Classic Jorge]

http://www.zamboni.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/08/0511.jpg

[Classic Jorge]

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

I'm going to have to see a doctor, aren't I? :-(

https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/9/94/Morbus_dupuytren_fcm.jpg

[Pat Vegas]

hassle.

I don't mean to be rude to ask for such things.
I have been told I should always be hustling. If I am sitting around doing nothing it's time I could be making money.

[Berni]

I've never seen him finger it once. :-(

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

[Berni]

Get some of this on it.

http://images.vitaminimages.com/hb/vf/productimages/HB/724/082832_A.png

[Pat Vegas]

Zamboni :bow:

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

I can't even pick my nose any more.

[Classic Jorge]

[Berni]

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

[Berni]

[Pat Vegas]

though I did download some.

You can get a ukele type sound with a capo on the 5th fret

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

'remedies'.

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

1980. Makes you think, doesn't it? Makes you think, 'old *******'.

[Classic Jorge]

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ice_resurfacer

[Classic Jorge]

https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/2/2b/Jack_Lord_1974.JPG

[Pat Vegas]

[Berni]

Thing is - theme tune aside - Hawaii five-nil was basically ****.

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

NTTAWWI.

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

He would call people up, and when they picked up the phone he played a tone doiwn it at a special frequency which melted their brain. Or something.

Anyway, it made me scared to answer the phone for ages.

Also, 'Book him Danno!'

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

Walking down Kalakauaua Avenue, a man approached me and asked, 'May I suck it?'

As I paused to consider this unexpected offer, he continued with his sales pitch. 'I won't waste it.'

Waste it? What the hell was he talking about?

[Classic Jorge]

It's a shame reall, all neck coverings are ultimately uncomfortable pieces of **** as, sartorially at least, I quite like them.

[Berni]

Also, Jack Lord had the look of a man who existed purely on Camels and the odd human adrenal gland.

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

I haven't been brave enough to wear it out in public yet though.

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

You're thinking of Detective Kono Kalakaua.

http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_p-pkNgIvOSg/TUskAvDLY5I/AAAAAAAAAA4/IXEA2xshf1w/s1600/07hawaii-50-kono1.jpg