Mortifying moment at lunchtime. I was walking along an alley, I looked in front and behind me to

[Berni]

ensure no-one was around and, having ascertained no-one was, let rip with a sonorous, basso-profundo fart of several seconds' duration.

Literally no sooner had I finished and with it still echoing off the alley walls than I look to my left to see that the alley had ceased to be wall and instead gave way to small allotments, wherein a lady of late middle years was gardening next to the fence.

The look of appalled disgust she gave me withered me, awimb, I don't mind telling you. I am still feeling deep, deep shame. :-(

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

You're a repulsive man, b, and no mistake.

Expelling flatus on the public highway? I shudder to think of it.

[Pokster]

[Pat Vegas]

[Berni]

To discover there was an innocent bystander to this moment of physical weakness horrified me almost as much as it did her.

I feel that ethically, what I did is forgiveable. I tried to minimise the impact. It was just unfortunate.

[Berni]

[Classic Jorge]

bitch

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

a Belge, so being surrounded by a faecal fug was his natural condition and he didn't bat an eye.

[Berni]

thing off with a cheery 'Better an empty house than a bad lodger'-type remark and think no more about it.

But then I remembered that I can't stand that sort of person.

[Berni]

Much like your Belgian friend, my great-grandfather was gassed at Ypres. :-(

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

[Snin]

then they just think you were starting off with large deep one / clearing your throat

[Brentwood]

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

Poor Uncle Kurt.

:hehe:

[Steve Williams - gay for Mark Knopfler]

We all need to break wind on occasion.

[Berni]

Enfield). That is much less bad than knowing that you're standing next to someone who can't escape, but making them inhale your bum particles.

I may have sinned accidentally, but such people are scum and should be kicked to their knees and shot in the back of the neck.

[Berni]

[Classic Jorge]

Or waft, would probably be more accurate.

As I say, bitch.

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

f**king hell, DRFC went ballistic.

[Classic Jorge]

"give her some more throttle next time, I'm sure she'll start" etc etc

[Classic Jorge]

[Berni]

He was a bit more Wiesenthaley, as I recall.

[Classic Jorge]

I've met both and I still couldnt tell you who was who

[Berni]

was over in seconds. I couldn't even apologise. I just scurried away. :cry: