Saturday's picnic on Hampstead Heath will consist of homemade bread

[Monty91]

British Pork Sausage Roll, Ham Hock, Mustard & Parsley Terrine
Pea, Ham & Gruyere Cheese Quiche, Salad of Heritage Tomatoes, Balsamic Onions, Jerseys & Leaves. slice of Bleu D’Auvergne Cheese, Oatcakes, Grapes, Celery & Chutney, Shortbread, Creme Patissiere & Summer Fruits, Mineral Water & Real Lemonade

Courtesy of Kentish Town food****s The Bull and Last and their magnificent summer hamper offering.

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

I wish you and yours a marvellous time though, naturally.

On Saturday I shall be lunching with the late lamented Ian Harvey (RIP) at an as yet undisclosed venue.

I will be happy to photograph and tweet my food if that would please you.

[Snin]

[Monty91]

my son will refuse to wear a hat so we have to retreat indoors, and they will forget to include an essential item of the hamper. My girlfriend will shout at me when I try to take a piss against a tree, rather than traipse to a public toilet, our child will have a massive tantrum because I tried to stop him eating soil and after 2 hours of misery we will pack up and drive home in silence.

Thank you for the offer of photographing your food. They would make a nice companion piece to the pictures of your genitalia you so often, and so kindly, send me.

[Mc Gooner]

[Classic Jorge]

[Pat Vegas]

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

I see a glorious summer afternoon, blessed by a cooling zephyr. I see Monty Jnr beaming with a mouth full of sausage roll, his adoring parents looking on, holding hands - perhaps even with the unspoken promise of some 'special cuddles' to follow.

I keep hoping to be able to send you a picture of my tumescent member, but sadly have had no such tumesence to photograph since I've known you. Still, that's only 15 years, so we've plenty of time.

[Pat Vegas]

picnics are ****.
I had a nice sandwiches and bottle of wine on a boat once that was nice.

[Snin]

[Monty91]

and I will be all ears :shrug:

[Classic Jorge]

I know your game, you are after popping down to the men's "swimming" lake

[Pat Vegas]

complete and utter mong.

[Monty91]

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

Are you driving home later after work? Cliche. Eating dinner with your family? Cliche. Watching TV? Cliche.

WE'RE ALL WALKING CLICHES!

[Supermac1976]

This will mean now't unless you've read the Monster Of Florence.

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

[Ashberto]

man-on-man action.

[Witharby 2-3 weeks]

[Monty91]

[Supermac1976]

[Snin]

does the trick for man on man action imo

[Witharby 2-3 weeks]

has just adopted 3 children ages 5-11. Brothers and sisters.

F**king mad. Absolutely f**king mad

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

[Classic Jorge]

I didnt even want to go back to get my clothes tbh

[Classic Jorge]

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

Explain yourself clearly and extensively.

[barrybueno]

Oh sorry, misread months as years

[Luis Anaconda]

Speaking of cliches, I am in Sheffield at the moment and the sun is out - that is 't right is it?

[Monty91]

Saw them a couple of weeks ago - now aged 5 and 6 and tried to intervene when the boy started kicking the **** out of another kid on a trampoline. He hissed at me and carried on :-(

[Supermac1976]

:hehe:

[Classic Jorge]

The chap is a walking metropolitan middle-class cliche.

He's probably hoping for a dry night before so he can wear his mahabis.

[Monty91]

which is unfair as you should never judge a man by his partner.

[Classic Jorge]

Oooh Sheffield in't sun, eh?

That lovely bit between the station and the peace gardens, is it? Watching the girls, are we?

[Snin]

[barrybueno]

Thinking of a 14 year old girl

Obviously

[Classic Jorge]

And lets be honest, you shoul hope to be judged by your partner, she's the more acceptable face.

[Classic Jorge]

Apart from the bits where you purchase illicit goods, of course

[Luis Anaconda]

[Monty91]

so they can bend their characters to their will more easily,

On the other hand, with a younger one, you could probably get away with more noncing :thumbup:

[Witharby 2-3 weeks]

If so then come on in and take you pick

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

There's little we can do about it except enjoy.

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

Brown or white, I may be a child abuser but I'm no racialist.

[Witharby 2-3 weeks]

Parents were junkies and the kids, 2 sisters and a brother between 8 and 12, were really messed up. Not overtly though. On first appearance they were introverted and a bit brusk but soon started hidden violence, dirty protests and thieving.

3 years of trying they had to give up on the boy and kept the two girls.

Boy will be institutionalized all his life unless something incredible happens.

[Monty91]

That didn't really work.

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

Well, it was an effort, anyway.

Tomorrow night I must eat alone in the West End. Where can a man eat alone in the West End without appearing... odd?

It's going to be a shawarma, isn't it?

[Monty91]

They aren't cruel, y'know.

[Mc Gooner]

[Classic Jorge]

[Classic Jorge]

Though I'm sure the bit outside the window of Claridges might seem that way.

[Witharby 2-3 weeks]

Must have small fingers to get between the engine bits whilst it is running

[Ashberto]

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

Park Lane to the west, Oxford Street to the north, Strand to the south and Kingsway to the east.

Everywhere else is the suburbs.

[Classic Jorge]

[barrybueno]

[Luis Anaconda]

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

6 continents! Living out here in the 'burbs, I must make the most of my weekly dalliances in the Big City.

[Monty91]

Barrafina, natch. Or Burger & Lobster.

Actually, I've got it. Palomar. Proper Jew food. Not like those ersatz New York wannabees like Mishkins. And bar seating.

http://thepalomar.co.uk/

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

I might burn the f**king place down, but that's as close as I'm likely to get to it.

I bet the waiter would start by explaining the 'concept' :puke:

No, I shall repair to my usual stool at the Beaufort Bar and eat lobster and truffle brioches.

[barrybueno]

[Ashberto]

My word.

[Witharby 2-3 weeks]

[Ashberto]

It comes from beyond these shores, I'm sure.

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

Savile Row, St James's, The Savoy, Claridges, Bond St and Selfridges. Outside of these places there are numerous wonderful things, but things I can find equally well elsewhere.

[Luis Anaconda]

[Classic Jorge]

In fact, everything between there and kings cross - and onwards to home - is for me. Mind you, that's where I was born.

[Classic Jorge]

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

The Savoy or The Connaught in the evening, naturally.

[Ashberto]

and kept cows on the Heath.

One of the Fitzroys (from a ******* of Charlie 2), from which Fitzrovia gets its name, lived on the site now occupied by the home of Alisher Usmanov in Highagte.

[Classic Jorge]

Well what else are you supposed to do when they put you in Wigmore St, I mean really.

[Classic Jorge]

Ours is three generations at most, all coming over at various different stages from Ireland.

[Ashberto]

[Classic Jorge]

Seriously you'd get loads from it