Ok Awimb. What's the better option

[Pat Vegas]

Getting a dog or having a baby.
:-(

[Peter]

[barrybueno]

[Peter]

Who on earht wants to buy a pub? They must be mad.

[Snin]

[barrybueno]

Thanks a lot for the first :hehe:

[Pat Vegas]

[Pat Vegas]

[Berni]

If you must go down this route, get cats.

[redgunamo]

[Monty91]

It is literally the most freedom-depriving thing that can happen to a human besides imprisonment and life-changing physical injury.

I don't regret doing it for one second, but I can't really say anything good about it , other than that it recalibrates your expectations and makes you grateful for things that you used to take for granted.

[Monty91]

a burden to them, but surely there's something to say for having a family around you as the years pass?

[Berni]

Anyway, it's fine. Just so long as sleep, sex, socialising (and consequently friends), travel, disposable income, cleanliness and peace aren't important to you.

[PSRB]

the clear issue of leaving having kids late

[redgunamo]

It seems far too many people nowadays don't.

[Berni]

need you less and less as the years go by. If they're still getting under your feet (or vice versa) when they're adults, you've probably got something wrong somewhere along the line.

What I'm saying is that this image of 'having a family around' is actually a snare and a delusion. It doesn't work like that.

[Peter]

You know, like 4th is the new 1st :-)

[Monty91]

which is little bit consolation.

Won't Phil buy you a nanny? Or would your morally autistic partner refuse the offer?

[Berni]

the company of insects.

[Peter]

But they will be thinking about the will

[Berni]

and clear while still under 50.

That said, my wife's kids are 8 and 12 :rolleyes:

[PSRB]

but can also be a lot of fun and come out with utter classics

No and Yes

[Peter]

The sense of relief when it ended was incredible. Iit is quite hideous and i wouldnt consider doing it full time for a minute.

[Monty91]

your kids uprooting and ending up living nowhere near you.

That would be fine. I don't have some romantic expectation of big get-togethers every weekend with old jokes and general epic bantz being swapped.

But there is surely a healthy middle ground where your kids are independent, but still love and respect you, and are still happy to see you.

I'm aware this relies heavily on you, as parents, not becoming increasingly irritating c**ts. And the bar is already set pretty low for me there.

[Berni]

I will be dead. Who, if anyone, attends my funeral is not of the slightest interest to me.

[redgunamo]

[PSRB]

[Mc Gooner]

"I know I had to have a dad but ffs, Monty" :cry:

[Monty91]

My 4-year-old niece is still funamentally dull. You get some good bantz from the 6-year-old, though.

[Pokster]

then 5 minutes later the nicest person in the world

[Monty91]

Have you self-diagnosed your child as autistic? :hehe:

Or is he actually autistic :-|

[Pokster]

[Ashberto]

is how many people actually have to have the damned thing(s) before they discover this.

[Trixie Popsicle]

Dogs are vile and kids are not much better. :hide:

[Monty91]

The freedom-depriving aspect is overplayed to a degree. You can still do anything you want, just not whenever you want, and if the activity is not child-friendly, you will need to leave the sprog with your partner, babysitter, family or friends. Hardly an insurmountable obstacle to doing the things you like in life.

In fact, on balance, I think my cultural input has increased since having a kid, because I make more of my free time than I used too.

Ultimately, I do think a lot of people don't have kids because of fear. The tell themselves it's because they don't like screaming, ****ting babies (like any of us do :rolleyes: ) but I suspect it's more that they fear they are not cut-out for the job. Which is fine.

[redgunamo]

so they blame fatherhood itself rather than their readiness for it.

Everyone knows knows my views on raising young but being a dad is alright. Oddly enough, for all the reasons my dad always demonstrated that it's alright :homer:

[Monty91]

[pjlincs]

[Ashberto]

I can't even look after myself properly. When I was a nipper my dear old Dad used to say to me "Never have kids, son. They are a millstone round your neck. If I hadn't had kids I'd have a villa in the South of France by now." Best advice he ever gave me. Though it has also served to highlight my relative abject failure. I have no kids, and all I've managed is a one bedroom flat in Islington.

[Hillary]

All those parents who say "I've never realised how hard it would be" - why the f**k not. You have eyes - it's completely obvious how horrible it is.

[Ashberto]

then retire to the study and drink brandy by a roaring fire while she gets on with it. I reckon most dads here would do that if they could. :hehe:

[Hillary]

My life in infinitely better for the lack of having to be responsible for kids. Infinitely.

[Monty91]

So it's not a matter of being cut out for the job, as such.

It's a matter of liking the idea on am emotional level. And having a partner who will do the bulk of the tedious **** that you can't be f**ked with. Obviously.

Doesn't the idea of introducing your own kid to the Lake District appeal? I mean, there's obviously a risk they would rather die than go on a long walk up a mountain with their dad. But imagine if they were into the idea? How ace would that be?

There's still time...

[Hillary]

Not such a problem for you, I accept.

[Monty91]

from imparting knowledge upon, and sharing experiences with, a child or young adult.

Is it really so strange that others have this capacity?

[Monty91]

the fact that, for large parts, there is absolutely zero reward for the hard work.

The official line is that it's f**king hard, but also extremely emotionally fulfilling.

I would put the ratio at 95 / 5 per cent. That's what takes you by surprise.

[Red N White Army]

[Ashberto]

instead be snapchatting his moronic friends, demanding stupidly expensive clothes, and having problems with schooling before setting off on a course of delinquency and shame.

Also, it's a bit of a **** world to grow up in, I expect. I wouldn't want to inflict that on the poor little bugger. Just for starters everyone seems to thing the sky is going to fall in if the wrong party wins an election, or even wins the odd seat. Then there are the eco-doomers, the religious fundie doomers, the Even Greater Crash Than Last Time doomers. The we'll never win anything with Wenger doomers. The list is endless :-(

[Ashberto]

thick cretins for shouldering the burden of providing a future for humanity. I'd never say that though. It would be terribly rude, insulting and disrespectful.

[PSRB]

imparting knowledge, seeing them develop their language and putting phrases into the correct context

[Dutch Gooner]

are very hard work....for a very long time...I have 4 kids ..and 1 dog....how dumb can one be ??? ....:hide:

[redgunamo]

to the world and your son's mates, and therefore his parents.

You know it might happen, of course, but the biggest shock you will ever know is when you hear your toddler spout off about Wright, Mueller and Greaves to his mates, and realise that he has somehow memorised every word you've ever said on that topic. And probably everything else too.

Having children makes you publicly responsible for the way you live your life. You can no longer hide.

[Steve Williams - gay for Mark Knopfler]

Difficult, at times. It is not horrible.

Of course the above may change on a person by person basis.

[Monty91]

once when the baby crawled to the cat's water bowl and promptly upturned it all over our beautiful, original hardwood floor.

Other than that, even though I'm essentially a single parent on weekday mornings. it was a breeze.

I got myself showered and dressed and had a nice bowl of porridge sprinkled with brown sugar while the kid entertained himself. Tonight I'm going to watch The Arsenal and tomorrow I'm going out for some nice Sezchuan food and to see "Force Majeur" at the Brunswick in Bloomsbury.

I certainly don't feel like a thick cretin.

[Ashberto]

[Berni]

bond in an interesting perspective for you. :hehe:

[barrybueno]

No doubt that the world is a much ****tier place today than when we grew up tho tbh.

[Monty91]

:-

Have you seen it? Any good, like?

[Berni]

[Berni]

Also, it made me think that going skiing is a **** way of spending a holiday.

[Monty91]

After two days of intense training, I was still absolutely f**king useless.

At one point I was in the queue for a beginners' slope and felt myself starting to slide. I grabbed the first thing I could cling on to, which happened to be a small Indian man who was with his family. We both slowly slid into the distance, clinging onto each other and making small talk for about 3 minutes before an instructor retrieved us.

I will never go skiing again.

[Ashberto]

[Hillary]

having to do it all the f**king time at such a low level does nothing for me.

[redgunamo]

wrong and then being grumpy and resentful about it seems odd. To me.

[Berni]

I was OK, but ultimately, it's cold, the food's not great and you're generally surrounded by the less amusing people of Europe - Germans, Austrians, Swiss, Scandis, etc. Life's too f**king short.

[Trixie Popsicle]

[Berni]

indoctrinating with all your prejudices, tics and hang-ups, they can't f**king touch you :cloud9:

[Monty91]

They are in bed at 7 every night.

[redgunamo]

you would holiday at next, the other day?

[Berni]

And I wouldn't go with j. We'd bicker constantly.

[redgunamo]

In football they say, He will learn to play better when he has better players around him; with hounds we say It's easy to raise good hunting dogs if you already have a good hunting pack.

Same difference with children, imo.

[redgunamo]

Or Bad Breeding, I suppose.