Would you accept the pole poll?

[Pat Vegas]

heemasexes are excluded.

I am killing time before my interview.

[Monty91]

[Classic Jorge]

I don't get the big whoop about acts of gayness, its basically just having sex with someone you don't find attractive and I've done plenty of that in my time

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

I'm sure I'd manage if money were at stake, of course. After all, I've spent a 30 year career basically getting f**ked in the arse every day :-(

[Pat Vegas]

or maybe that's a specialist service

[Monty91]

snogging one.

[7evens]

and levels of personal hygene

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

I don't fancy the jizz.

[Pat Vegas]

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

[Billy Goat Sverige]

them to let you know when they're about to splurt their load.

[the splendor of antigone]

thing to do. It never is with money involved

[Monty91]

by all means we can try :thumbup:

[Pat Vegas]

it's been addressed on here before as a horrendous scoop to remove. I won't go any further.

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

[Berni]

I thought that was very funny. There was a chap who wasn't interested in the jizz either.

[barrybueno]

It's not funny now.

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

knocked your teeth out with a hammer in order to make the ride smoother, and you look him in the eye, and through the blood and spit you plead, 'Big Harry, please don't come in my mouth.'

:-(

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

There was one by a chap named Gross Phart, to which another wag replied, 'Your name is rather appropriate here'. :hehe:

[Berni]

Besides, the jagged, broken teeth would represent a hazard to the wellbeing of his knob, surely?

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

Back in 5.

[Berni]

Still. :-(



Quote:



I tried bottoming once but found that my anus bled for days afterwards.I went to hospital and they had to insert stitches,unfortuneatly this procecedure left me unable to defacate for a further 3 weeks at which time I had developed septaciemia and was rushed back to hospital for an emergency operation.After 2 more weeks I had recovered enough to be allowed home.However further complications set in and I was forced to have a rectal probe inserted which allowed me to pass stools(it resemebled one of those things they put around dogs/cats necks after they have had operations and concsequently I had to lay on my stomach.After a further 3 weeks it was removed but I continued to have bloody puss oozing from my rectal passage.The nurse referred me to a specialist who recommended a diet consisting entirely of fruit and pulses.This seems to have worked and I have also lost 3 stone in weight which is something of a bonus.

[Witharby 2-3 weeks]

In those days it was any port in a storm I tell you

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

[Berni]

I like the fact that his therapist then went on to suggest teabagging, frottage and rimming as alternatives. When do you get therapy for being buggered sideways? :hehe:

[Steve Williams - gay for Mark Knopfler]

[Berni]

[Steve Williams - gay for Mark Knopfler]

Simple really.

Maybe not very pc but there you go.

[the splendor of antigone]

[Monty91]

[Peter]

A chinning seems a proportionate response (albeit technically assault)

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

You can see the flaw in your plan.

[Steve Williams - gay for Mark Knopfler]

Good bumming, as such.

[Steve Williams - gay for Mark Knopfler]

I would perform an over the shoulder move, and then chin him.

I have training you know.

[Monty91]

You are a better man than me.

[Steve Williams - gay for Mark Knopfler]

In fact if I was a Mister Man I would be Mr Tolerant.

I have nothing against poofs and what they choose to do with consenting like minded folk.

[the splendor of antigone]

[Steve Williams - gay for Mark Knopfler]

:davewhelan:

[Berni]

wine would have flowed, there'd have been sparkling conversation. You'd have gone back to his beautifuilly appointed apartment, where you'd sit and discuss music. Then he'd start gently stroking your thigh, playing with your hair, nibbling your ear and...gradually, one thing would lead to anothere until you eventually end up spending a wonderful, passionate evening of generous, exciting lovemaking together.

How about that?

[Steve Williams - gay for Mark Knopfler]

I would have had his card marked as a poof early doors and thus avoided the scenario you painted.

First pub and the umbrella in his drink.

Bang.

[Peter]

[Berni]

A mouth's a mouth, sw. You'd have to be pretty churlish to turn that down imo. :shrug:

[Steve Williams - gay for Mark Knopfler]

Consider yourself warned.

[Peter]

Passion and sex are not things to be feared, sw.

Neither is desire, however deviant society may deem it. It is very nstural, beautiful in its own way :-)

[Steve Williams - gay for Mark Knopfler]

Sucking a man's cock, or indeed a man sucking my cock, is simply not for me irrespective of the cash sums involved.

As I have said, consenting benders can crack on and good luck to them. Just not I.

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

Maybe he'd change the words to 'Irish Rose'. Like the Rose of Tralee! I can imagine you as the Rose of Tralee, sw.

[Steve Williams - gay for Mark Knopfler]

:judge:

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

on his matelot's member. He said he was instantly outraged but, just before he started punching the bloke, he realised that it was the best blow job he'd ever had.

So he closed his eyes.

[Monty91]

very much open to offers in this regard.

[Steve Williams - gay for Mark Knopfler]

I would still politely decline the offer of a cock.

Standards you see.

If one has standards then one does not flinch, otherwise one's standards can simply be bought for a price, at which point they cease to become standards.

[Steve Williams - gay for Mark Knopfler]

Kind of like being a butcher and not expecting to handle raw meat.

[Berni]

harm and the experience is probably likely to be enjoyable. Plus you don't have to look at him or anything icky like that. As long as he f**ks off the minute he's finished and doesn't speak, I've no problem with it.

[Berni]

[Ashberto]

affectionate in the direction someone who wasn't a lady? Could this have ever happened?

[Berni]

He'd simply play the gig, suck you off and leave without a word.

You wouldn't have to go underground or handle his Wildwood at any point.

[Ashberto]

[Steve Williams - gay for Mark Knopfler]

Monty is your man for this specific dilemma, though I suspect he knew from the off.

[Monty91]

[Ashberto]

[Berni]

Sorry for any racial stereotyping.

[Steve Williams - gay for Mark Knopfler]

In this case I would relax and open a craft beer, allow him to play the gig and even in a minx like fashion would tease 2-3 encores out of him, then chin him and tell him to get the f**k out of my house.

I am unequivocal in my stance here.

[Monty91]

The last time I touched one, I got told off by Awimb for doing it all wrong :shrug:

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

Who knew?

[Berni]

Imagine the headlines, sw! :-(

And all because you welched on a deal.

[Steve Williams - gay for Mark Knopfler]

Thing is he would probably throw up.

[barrybueno]

Best not mention The Bitterest Pill :hehe:

[Berni]

[Classic Jorge]

wdbb

[Monty91]

without risk of throwing up. So your mocking is based on a lie.

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

Midnight or any time you care to mention, really.

[Berni]

[Berni]

Cos...y'know...he's ****.

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

[Steve Williams - gay for Mark Knopfler]

I have never paid for sex, nor needed to.

[Steve Williams - gay for Mark Knopfler]

Pal.

[Classic Jorge]

[Berni]

Who here is the true enemy of Weller? Hmmm? All he wants to do is give you a gobble.

[Berni]

*****. That's a guarantee.