I need Awimb's assistance with something. (as usual)

[Pat Vegas]

To keep a long story short.

Good friend of mine's stag party this weekend.
It's been arranged in advance by a chap who I don't know that well and are many people attending.

Am I wrong to think the following points are a mildly annoying. As we only found about these this past Saturday.

1) the thing starts at 9.30 am in the middle of nowhere. This assumes that all people are driving there.

2) All of a sudden we've been instructed to dress in country gent gear, tweed, flat caps, Not much notice on this really? I am not going to spend money on this stuff.

3) I need to contribute to a 'roast' of the individual.

So apart from that stuff.

What can I do for this clothes problem? Charity shop? or ask my grand father to give me one of his flat caps.

Also when did stag parties become gay?

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

NTTAWWI.

[Berni]

What is wrong with just getting really pissed, for f**k's sake? When did it become necessary to turn the thing into a production number?

[Classic Jorge]

check out the comedy central roasts for ammunition

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t4vkaW_U0dg

[Berni]

best man and the head (ooo-er) usher do the business.

[Steve Williams - gay for Mark Knopfler]

1) Tell him to f**k off and arrive when you want. f**king start time, f**k off.
2) Tell him to f**k off again, unless you wear such clothing anyway.
3) I don't know what that means but I suspect telling the person to f**k off again may suffice.

[Pat Vegas]

[Classic Jorge]

[Berni]

I think I'm going to have to tell him to f**k off next time he speaks to me. The racist old c**t.

[Brentwood]

http://cdn.images.express.co.uk/img/dynamic/1/590x/farage24apr14-472194.jpg

[Classic Jorge]

it's as if he's saying "Oh you know I black up"

[Pat Vegas]

[Steve Williams - gay for Mark Knopfler]

Simply next time you know he is in the back garden get yourself a small stool and pop your head over the fencing:

http://img.thesun.co.uk/aidemitlum/archive/00941/SNN04BALA_280_941603a.jpg

[Brentwood]

[Steve Williams - gay for Mark Knopfler]

Honestly, phone the groom as he is a good mate of yours, tell him to f**k off as well and suggest he stop treating adults like a bunch of kids on a f**king school trip.

[Berni]

[Pat Vegas]

and skip the first bit.
It's just annoying that it's all over the place.

The first gimmick is in middle of the country. Then to the hotel which on the otherside of Oxford. then it's cabs from there.

[Classic Jorge]

Less tweedy and, well, racist

[Brentwood]

[Classic Jorge]

[Pat Vegas]

The whole day is planned with military precision.

[Berni]

There's usually some utter c**t who says something like 'Don't you want to go quad biking/death sliding/whatever?' in a sort of whiny and accusatory way, but you just a/ ignore them or b/ point out that you're a grown adult.

[Pat Vegas]

There is some sort of boat stuff and drinking whiskey later.

If I skip the shooting all is cool. Then I don't have to dress up like a cock.

[Steve Williams - gay for Mark Knopfler]

Wtf.

[Classic Jorge]

[Berni]

I wouldn't normally allow my woman to make such choices for me, but such was her vehemence that I thought better of it.

With hindsight, she was right.

[Brentwood]

[Pat Vegas]

[Classic Jorge]

You can't wear black shoes and dark trousers, you look like a cure fan

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

Not for me, Clive.

[Pat Vegas]

of Wood.

[Snin]

[Steve Williams - gay for Mark Knopfler]

[Steve Williams - gay for Mark Knopfler]

[Steve Williams - gay for Mark Knopfler]

Are you attending a funeral J?

[Berni]

I don'teven like to think what you look like, tbh. :-(

[Classic Jorge]

[Classic Jorge]

[Brentwood]

http://image.shutterstock.com/display_pic_with_logo/917021/214430287/stock-photo-man-fashion-dressing-in-a-blue-jacket-with-hood-black-underwear-yellow-pants-leather-boot-shoes-214430287.jpg

[Classic Jorge]

[Classic Jorge]

[Berni]

However, I was assuming that j wanted to look good.