Kill it again! Kill it again!

[Berni]

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/howaboutthat/1137 3809/Miracle-cat-hit-by-car-escapes-grave-and-returns-home.h tml (http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/howaboutthat/11373809/Miracle-cat-hit-by-car-escapes-grave-and-returns-home.html)

[Classic Jorge]

http://www.gemseddon.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/petsematary.jpg

Oh how it hurts me to spell that

[Berni]

http://beyondthemarquee.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/pet_sematary_07_stor.jpeg

[Classic Jorge]

I mean, it could be something to do with looking like a Frankenstein, mate

[Supermac1976]

Much more horrifying imo.
http://img2.imagesbn.com/p/9781424157495_p0_v1_s260x420.JPG



Quote:



Have you ever . . . -Confronted a friend struggling with a problem and got the idea that you, too, struggle with a similar problem? -Consoled a friend with cancer and found you might soon be handling it yourself? -Helped a grieving widow, since you are a widow and know what she is going through? -Corrected a child, only to have the Holy Spirit correct you about something similar? -Struggled with a particular sin, only to turn around and immediately be able to help a friend with the exact same struggle? -Felt led to teach others about an issue because you had worked through it yourself? -Scolded a puppy for not minding you and knew instantly that you disobey God in the same way? This book is for you, my friend. It is not about dogs or me, but about you and your relationship with God. He wants to teach you, mold you, train you. He will use your children, your pets, your family, your friends, your problems, your sin, your sickness, your situations every day to learn and grow. All you have to do is listen.

[Ashberto]

[Classic Jorge]

...but seriously, I find Christianity massively more confusing.

Especially as rather a lot of people I know seem to have found god recently. Previously sane and rational people keep putting things about "Him" and "accepting Jesus' love and grace" on Facebook.

Do people get god - much like kids, marriage and divorce - in their mid thirties or something, is this actually a thing?

[Classic Jorge]

https://metrouk2.files.wordpress.com/2015/01/shetland-pony.jpg

[Berni]

[Classic Jorge]

[Ashberto]

Obviously Popery and US Fundyism are abominations too, but most denominations in this country are mostly harmless. Besides, anything which keeps my more theologicaly inclined neighbours out of the hands of the Ayatollahs is a good thing imo.

[Luis Anaconda]

[Classic Jorge]

It's just that a *lot* of people seem, unconnected people, seem to have found jesus at more or less the same time.

The only common thread seems to be their age, I was just wondering whether this sudden discovery of faith is a time of life thing or part of a broader sociological trend. Of course, it could all just be an anomaly.

Just a quick footnote, I'm not very anti-religious by atheist standards. I can see people get a benefit out of it and, in truth, I'm actually quite jealous of them.

They look inside themselves and find faith. I look inside myself and find yet more existential angst and nothingness.

[Berni]

Jesus wept. They talk about God as though he actually exists and they're personally acquainted with him, for f**k's sake. That's not what the C of E is for.

Give me Catholicism any day. You don't have to believe in God, you just have to believe in the Church and hate protestants. Much better.

[Classic Jorge]

Only to be slightly stumped when one of the people who ran it got in touch to excitedly discuss the life and times of Zarathustra.

That was a bit awkward, I can tell you

[Luis Anaconda]

They don't seem to care about the whole thing at all - just drinking tea and looking after the nice churches

[Berni]

Sorry. No, but it's more to do with the C of E getting fiercely evangelical lately, I think. This lot, in fact:

http://www.alpha.org/

[Ashberto]

Jesus Knows.

[Berni]

harmless. These Alpha Course types, though. Bad lot.

[Berni]

[Luis Anaconda]

f**k that lot

[Classic Jorge]

I think you might be right about the Alphas.

The strange thing about them is that they seem to have their own marketing dept separate from the usual Godvertising ("There's a U in JESUS") stuff.

There's part of me that wants to go along and see what the fuss is about. Though I think that is probably very, very much a bad idea.

Like the time I spent a little too long in the Hare Krishna temple in Soho. Thank f**k they revealed they were all vegetarians or I could've possibly still been rattling around airports selling people flowers.

[Luis Anaconda]

No one would phone or email you then

[Berni]

[Classic Jorge]

[Luis Anaconda]

[Classic Jorge]

[Ashberto]

I suppose if needs be they can be turned into flats, :hide: but I love occasionally popping into a church in central London of a lunchtime for some peace and quiet.

[Classic Jorge]

All these weird diet christianities seem a bit Coke Zero to me.

[Berni]

He then asked me for 20 quid. I said 'No. You just gave me this book.' He then said I had to give it back if I didn't give him 20 quid and tried to grab it. There was some shoving.

[Classic Jorge]

You'd love it up here, we're overflowing with Methodist Chapels, most of which have been converted into reaaaaallly expensive houses.

[Berni]

[Classic Jorge]

To be fair, the Bhagavad Gita is a twiffik book.

[Ashberto]

What I know about Johnny Catholic is that he has a fanatical loyalty to a foreign power and that he spent his childhood being f**ked up the arse by priests.

[Berni]

Anyway, this chap's blatant materialism rather put me off the bald ****s.

[Classic Jorge]

One of my favourite things about catholicism, and I may add I'm not even baptised let alone confirmed, is the attitude to the lapsers.

Me and the OH got cornered by the priest when we were last in their local Catholic Club (pub, basically) who freely admitted he'd be happy to marry us both anyway as I "basically knew the nuts and bolts of the whole thing".

[Berni]

http://media1.s-nbcnews.com/i/MSNBC/Components/Slideshows/_production/ss-140912-ian-paisley/ss-140912-ian-paisley-09.jpg

[Classic Jorge]

Big massive gold maces and flaming arrows, that's my sort of religion.

[Ashberto]

[redgunamo]

And there's loads of peace and quiet out in the hunting fields. Fresh air and exercise too.

[Classic Jorge]

And that the only thing he comes back with are dead rats

[Berni]

Whore of Rome' :hehe:

If you're going to be a bigoted nutter, you might as well be colourful about it imo.

[Berni]

I found him and his disciples going through my bins a couple of weeks back.

[Berni]

[redgunamo]

That whole poo-thing is just for you urban trendies, I think. Anyway, it's outside my bailiwick

[Classic Jorge]

[Classic Jorge]

The little ******* brought back a live bat the other week. c**t flew around my house for a good half an hour before I was able to shoo it out.

I kept expecting the f**ker to change into Christopher Lee

[PSRB]

"I'm not taking any chances, just in case there is"

[Luis Anaconda]

like normal people

[Classic Jorge]

[Classic Jorge]

[Luis Anaconda]

[Classic Jorge]

As you buy more peanuts you reveal even more tantalising glimpses of her holy scriptures.

https://bealing.files.wordpress.com/2011/01/bigd.jpg

[Berni]

disappointed at you :-(