Don't know quite where to start with this story

[Berni]

Although let's begin with the fact that I struggle with the idea that eating a giant lizard constitutes 'luxury'

http://www.theguardian.com/world/2015/jan/27/chinese-police- eaten-endangered-giant-salamander-banquet (http://www.theguardian.com/world/2015/jan/27/chinese-police-eaten-endangered-giant-salamander-banquet)

[Classic Jorge]

Yes, we know Bush Tucker Man, everything f**king tastes like chicken to you.

http://i.ytimg.com/vi/QizyeEA3mL8/hqdefault.jpg

[redgunamo]

appears to have got off lightly. They often just slit its throat and drink its blood.

[Snin]

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/8/83/Scaramanga.png

[Classic Jorge]

Even in the blue safari suit he still just looks like Dracula on holiday

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

I am beginning to get awfully irritated by the wiley chinee.

I recently approached a hotel breakfast buffet where I was simultaneously hit but the roaring sound and pungent whiff of a massive belch loosed by the chinaman next to me.

Dirty *******s to a man.

[Witharby 2-3 weeks]

All the hunters in call centers probably

[Snin]

[Snin]

as the lankans call them indians anyway

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

Fenced in and peered at by truckloads of tourists, the poor *******s.

[Berni]

Do they really think tiger ***** or rhino horn is going to magically make them into great lovers? Or that eating this revolting creature will stop them getting old?

Surely they must have noticed by now that none of this stuff actually works?

For the record, though, yes, they are a horrible lot. Barring ribs in brown gloop and a bit of porcelain, I fail to see what they've added to the gaiety of nations.

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

[Berni]

on the other side. wd the Sinhalese imo.

[Classic Jorge]

/romans

[Snin]

to them no doubt

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

They have some attractive chicks, mind.

[Witharby 2-3 weeks]

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-asia-30896028

[Classic Jorge]

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

The 40,000 women and children he took out at the same time seemed a little harsh. Ho hum, omelettes and eggs, I suppose.

He was of course voted out of power while we were then, and attempted a military coup. Happily the generals told him to f**k off.

[Berni]

they never came up with glass, which in turn meant that they never did optics and - apart from anything else - that meant their scientists, mathematicians, etc. all went blind and ceased to be any use beyond about 40. Silly f**kers.

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

No wonder your doorman thinks you're vulgar.

[Berni]

Not a twitch, though. I am a man of iron will. wd me.

[Witharby 2-3 weeks]

I have a meeting with someone who refuses to remove his crucifx in a food preparation area due to his beliefs. I presume he believes it is his right to choke somebody if it slips off during work.

Appears more believable that a Rhino horn will give you the horn than a mystical being controls everything

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

Have you been watching The Omen again?

[Berni]

And we certainly wouldn't let them start slaughtering endangered animals in pursuit of their beliefs. Because we're civilised, see?

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

It's not a comparable thing.

[Classic Jorge]

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

Civilised is rather strong a term. More civilised than the chinee, perhaps.

[Witharby 2-3 weeks]

It appears a cross is just the cross whereas a Crucix is the cross with the body attached. You learn something everyday

[Berni]

Bargain.

[Berni]

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

[Ashberto]

".. including prison sentences for people caught eating rare wild animals"

tbf this is not government policy to exterminate rare species.

[Berni]

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

You've got to be suspicious of people who choose to eat with sticks.

[Witharby 2-3 weeks]

The thing that gets me is that there is nothing in Catholicism that demands the continual wearing of a crucifix etc. We have checked with the local pope

[Ashberto]

You'll be demanding humane treatment of employees, next.

[Berni]

Or are we just looking at them and going 'that looks a bit ****' and feeling sad?

I merely pose the question.

[Classic Jorge]

[Classic Jorge]

Blessed are the cheese makers

[Ashberto]

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

generally horrible, evil f**kers who deserve every last iota of ill-treatment, because as you know, we are a remarkably revolting species.

Animals, on the other hand, have no voice, are disenfranchised, and are innocent.

You might think it radical, but I favour removing the vote from lefties and giving it to animals. Not all animals, obviously. Just the really bright ones, chickens and cats.

[Berni]

not to notice the f**king great crucifix in your gob.

No, there's no reason to have to wear a crucifix, but equally there's nothing in Islam that demans the wearing of hijabs, niqabs or burkas, but I think you'd be a bit more circumspect about having that conversation, wouldn't you? Christians are starting to get a bit more uppity as they see all the allowances made for other faiths but not for them, see?

[Witharby 2-3 weeks]

It's all fruit, veg and salads for me

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

fear, depression, compassion, jealousy and love.

They are also excellent at telling the time.

[Classic Jorge]

In fact, it's a scale as yet unmatched

[Witharby 2-3 weeks]

As for clothing it is all covered with hats and coats anyhow.

[Berni]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QhMo4WlBmGM

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

E is a teenager and is therefore allowed to be wrong.

[Berni]

[Ashberto]

the others will demand it too.

Perhaps not an entirely bad thing at the end of the day if we can eventually turn round and say "STOP IT! ALL OF YOU!" without appearing to be singling one group out.

Or alternatively just make the rational argument against special religious privilege now but it seems we lack the self-belief to do this.

[Ashberto]

http://metro.co.uk/2015/01/24/amazing-moment-a-lioness-hugge d-a-man-who-saved-her-life-5034733/ (http://metro.co.uk/2015/01/24/amazing-moment-a-lioness-hugged-a-man-who-saved-her-life-5034733/)

https://metrouk2.files.wordpress.com/2015/01/ad_157624189.jpg?quality=70&w=930&h=620&crop=1#038;strip=all&w=1000&h=667

Earlier:
https://metrouk2.files.wordpress.com/2015/01/533387_10150647596562595_818317690_n.jpg

[Berni]

It should be eating that man.

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

are less worthy of basic rights than we are. One also suspects that they know a lot more than they're letting on.

[Witharby 2-3 weeks]

Nobody can hide from Health and Safety

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

He is such a prude, he gets right on my tits sometimes.

[Berni]

England and Beasts of the Southern Wild.

All of which he raved about. All of which were ****.

He doesn't actually have a sense of humour, either. Not a proper one.

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

I have no patience for these types at present. They distract me from doing the Lord's good work, with my HOLY KNIFE AND HAMMER.

[Ashberto]

Have dolphins stopped their favoured pastime of gang-rape yet?

[Berni]

I've never seen an animal as rapey as your average drake.

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

They commit fewer gang-rapes than many people I know.

[Ashberto]

on its tiny feet, and tiny legs. Lost. Scared. Dying.

https://metrouk2.files.wordpress.com/2015/01/533387_10150647596562595_818317690_n.jpg

Then a human, the animal capable of showing compassion to other species, rescues it and brings it up. Even teaches it how to hunt so that one day it might return to the wild.

[Berni]

[redgunamo]

looooooooooooooooooooool.

[Ashberto]

Since when have you shown any interest in cats, hmmm?

[Ashberto]

Bunking off for a fag in the fives court, I suspect.

[Berni]

Everything about nature is callous, uncaring and actually rather horrid. But at the same time rather amazing.

[Ashberto]

perfectly natural. It is our ability to move beyond nature that sets us apart from the animals.

[redgunamo]

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

You're utterly wrong.

[Berni]

[Berni]

around in it. It is immutable, all-powerful and utterly, utterly uncaring.

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

One can wonder at nature, red in tooth and claw, whilst feeling sentimental about it. Indeed, one often sees evidence of compassion in nature. Watch a monkey grooming her child, watch an elephant mourning a dead mate - without anthropomorphising there is more than enough scope in nature for sentimentality.

I dare you to stand in a patch of scrub in the middle of bumf**k nowhere Africa at sunrise and not feel sentimental about the wonder around you. If you can't, you're simply not human.

[Berni]

what's actually wondrous about the whole thing. Namely, that it carries on regardless of all our silly notions and sentiments. The persistent, brutal and remorseless logic of the continuum is what gets me every time.

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

Dolphins leaping and spinning just for the pleasure of it. There are many examples of sentiment in nature. You can't think of it as an unfeeling automaton; to do so is to place yourself outside it.

[redgunamo]

Compared to the way they describe *us*, at any rate.

[Berni]

Practice, exercise, social bonding, attempting to impress mates: all of these are equally good explanations of their behaviour, but you wade straight in there with your soppy notions of 'joy'.

This is what's wrong with your sentimentality. It makes you intellectually lazy.

[Sir Charlie of Nicholas]

was 'generally accepted' that this behaviour was an expression of joie de vivre.

How's that for intellectual laziness?

[Berni]

Joie de vivre, my hairy nutsack.