I was away from home last night and, rather rashly, failed to provide myself with a second pair of

[Berni]

trousers. Not to worry, I thought, what harm can befall a chap's trousers during a sedate birthday meal? I shall simply wear them again tomorrow, I thought. No problem, I thought.

Dawn breaks today on the sight of my poor strides crumpled on the bedroom floor, bearing a number of mysterious stains ranging from what I think is Hoi Sin sauce to one that looks remarkably like a human footprint :sherlock:

Having no time to get home and furnish myself with another pair, however, I have had to don the soiled items and simply remain with my legs under my desk all day or scuttle about in the office while using items like sheaves of paper, folders or whatever else is to hand to shield my trouser shame.

Lesson learned. Always - always - take a spare pair of trousers.

[Classic Jorge]

Failing that you could pop to the bogs with a stapler and fashion a pair out of bog roll :macguyver:

[Brentwood]

for 2 hours until the shops opened so i could buy a new one. I looked like an absolute tramp

[Berni]

However, if I come back into the office wearing a new pair of trousers, I'm afraid people will assume I've fouled myself.

[Maravilloso Marvo]

I doubt anybody will notice.
In fact, I doubt anybody knows you exist.

[Classic Jorge]

And people thinking you've fouled yourself and thought "f**k it, I might look like a sloppy party bottom at a gangbang slash chinese buffet but I dont give a monkeys"

[redgunamo]

You know, something involving Mexican drug smugglers, saucy dollybirds with concealed hunting knives strapped to their thighs and perhaps a lost & found puppy?

[Berni]

Not for me the joys of faceless, big corporate anonymity.

I came in a couple of months back wearing a badly ironed shirt and was asked by half the fecking office how I was coping with the break-up. Nosey sods. :rolleyes:

[redgunamo]

[Maravilloso Marvo]

[Berni]

[ITSUPFORGRABSNOW]

And as I'm unemployed at present I'm getting some practise at all bar the ironing bit