For those of you who know me and Mrs C and might be interested

[Herbert Augustus Chapman]

lovely wife whom I only knew on here as CD.

Imagine if Berni had happened on Barney first! He'd have been straight on the blower to McDdonalds to see what he could get.

Monty would have hidden behind a hedge trembling like a girl and then boasted to his wife at dinner how he'd been attacked by wild horses in a country lane but had managed to fight them off (she would still think he was a çunt).

And one last thing. I recall some time ago you having your nose amputated due to cancer (Monty's dark arts I suspect). Can I say they did a splendid job with your prosthesis?

[Sir C]

lovely wife whom I only knew on here as CD.

Imagine if Berni had happened on Barney first! He'd have been straight on the blower to McDdonalds to see what he could get.

Monty would have hidden behind a hedge trembling like a girl and then boasted to his wife at dinner how he'd been attacked by wild horses in a country lane but had managed to fight them off (she would still think he was a çunt).

And one last thing. I recall some time ago you having your nose amputated due to cancer (Monty's dark arts I suspect). Can I say they did a splendid job with your prosthesis?

You are too kind, h. Your words have brought a tear to my eye this morning.

If only I’d had the option of having this piggy snout removed and replaced with something a little more delicate. It’s the Irish 8n me, see?