Din Dins?

[Sir C]

I am no David Attenborough but do spiders sting?

Yep. Sting you dead, the fúckers. Especially the ****s you find in the bath with the really long legs.

[SWv2]

Yep. Sting you dead, the fúckers. Especially the ****s you find in the bath with the really long legs.

Do they not bite you?

[Sir C]

Do they not bite you?

No they most certainly do not, for I outsmart them by shouting until Mrs C comes and takes them away. :shrood:

[PSRB]

Fùck. Me.

Why?

I got roundly turned on on Twitter for liking milk, milk FFS!!

What do these whack jobs actually think will happen with these animals if they aren't eaten, milked or widely used in the fashion industry???!!

[SWv2]

No they most certainly do not, for I outsmart them by shouting until Mrs C comes and takes them away. :shrood:

You big fúcking Dutch gay.

I once held a tarantula in my hand, naturally this was not an action of choice but one I was coerced into and in order to retain my Snake Pliskin type image with my children I styled it out.

I was fúcking ****ting bricks.

[Sir C]

You big fúcking Dutch gay.

I once held a tarantula in my hand, naturally this was not an action of choice but one I was coerced into and in order to retain my Snake Pliskin type image with my children I styled it out.

I was fúcking ****ting bricks.

I saw one in a tree in a jungle with loads of babies on its back.

Eyes. The fúcking eyes haunt me to this day. Imagine waking up to find the fúcking spider had laid it's eggs under the skin of your helmet and next thing, BOOM your bellend has exploded and there's fúcking monstrous spiders pouring out fo the tattered lump of flesh that used to be your cóck and they're stinging the fúck out of you and looking at you with their eyes.

AND YOU ASK WHY I'M SCARED OF SPIDERS?

[SWv2]

I saw one in a tree in a jungle with loads of babies on its back.

Eyes. The fúcking eyes haunt me to this day. Imagine waking up to find the fúcking spider had laid it's eggs under the skin of your helmet and next thing, BOOM your bellend has exploded and there's fúcking monstrous spiders pouring out fo the tattered lump of flesh that used to be your cóck and they're stinging the fúck out of you and looking at you with their eyes.

AND YOU ASK WHY I'M SCARED OF SPIDERS?

Serves you fúcking right for going into a jungle you stupid ****. If you were meant to be mooching around jungles you wouldn't have been born in SE London or wherever.

Silly bastárd.

[WES]

Serves you fúcking right for going into a jungle you stupid ****. If you were meant to be mooching around jungles you wouldn't have been born in SE London or wherever.

Silly bastárd.

Same with Africa generally.

I have only just returned from holiday with - yet another - couple who went on Safari in Africa. The summary from pretty much everyone is; expensive, sh1t food, stomach ailments, chance of serious disease, lack of security, no cultural or architectural items of interest whatsoever BUT you get to see animals in their natural habitat.

What sort of c*nt does that?

[IUFG]

Same with Africa generally.

I have only just returned from holiday with - yet another - couple who went on Safari in Africa. The summary from pretty much everyone is; expensive, sh1t food, stomach ailments, chance of serious disease, lack of security, no cultural or architectural items of interest whatsoever BUT you get to see animals in their natural habitat.

What sort of c*nt does that?

Don't animals live in Zoos?

In any case a lion / tiger. A big cat.
Zebras - like a horse / Donkey.
Wildebeest - a horned cow.

These 'safari guides' must be laughing into their sleeves at the sort of **** who pays them to go with them into (what is essentially) a fúcking desert in an uncomfortable 30 year old Land Rover.