Pasta is the only sane option*. This is quite a good standby when I have to indulge vegetarians.
https://goodfood.uktv.co.uk/recipe/l...lone-piccante/
* Actually, telling her to fück right off and that if she wants to eat that slop then she can cook it herself is the only sane option, but you're not going to do that, you uxorious fellow, you.