My lunchtime was unsatisfactory, AWIMB

[Burney]

The whole park bench thing just makes you look like a gyppo, or a pervert.

Neither of which I expect is the image you were hoping to purvey to the outside world when you set out today.

But this is surely what park benches are supposed to be for, isn't it? We can't let them be solely the preserve of old people, drunk teenagers, perverts and spies meeting their handlers, can we?