See, I thought I would either a/ trigger the inner forelock-tugging mechanism of these proles or b/ act as a convenient hate figure, thus taking the heat off my moved away/done well for herself and thus apparently hateful in working class terms wife.

No. She thinks I'd just end up getting on famously with them while they still hated her anyway. So she'd rather I didn't go.

Working class snobbery/envy is f**king weird. I don't get it.