First time, trying to score a new contract, best party frock and top behaviour, you know the drill.

Upon arrival I needed a pee, so upon meeting my contact for the first time and being ushered into a meeting room, I pointed to the toilet door nearby and said, "I'll just pop in there first."

So I popped in there, all single-minded and focussed, and it struck me a strange that there was a Tampax vending machine on the wall and no urinals. Undeterred I entered a cubicle and did my business. Standing there, old chap in hand, the realisation dawned on me that I had entered the ladies in error.

By now I was, of course, committed, so bravely continued to piss, praying to all the Gods that a woman wouldn't enter and catch me. In this regard my blushes were spared.

As I exited my man, who was waiting for me, raised a quizzical eyebrow and enquired whether I always used the ladies, or whether I preferred to mix it up a bit.

Walked out with the contract, mind.