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Thread: peter. You cannot abandon a lady and leave her potless and homeless.

  1. #41
    Quote Originally Posted by Peter View Post
    Thanks for that and sorry to hear about your situation.

    Everyone around me tells me to only think of myself and to hell with her. Easy to say, much harder to do when the person in question is someone you have shared your life with for 12 years.

    what she has done over the last 3 months or so has been appalling by any standards. Its some kind of mid life crisis, made worse by some other health factors which I wont go into.

    I warned her repeatedly that I was going to leave but, mid infatuation, she just didnt care. Now it has hit home what my leaving actually means she has crashed horribly. Its hard enough to not go back and offer help. I am certainly not going to steal her only security from her.

    Apart from anything else, she still has the cats and the dog. where are they supposed to go???
    I know our circumstances are different, but if it comes to us going our own way I won't let the mum of my 3 kids struggle to afford a house, it isn't her fault she can't now work and medication doesn't seem to help ..... she is still a mum and any help i can give I will
    Northern Monkey ... who can't upload a bleeding Avatar

  2. #42
    Quote Originally Posted by Peter View Post
    There were periods where we were happy but she has got steadily worse over the last few years, largely because she does absolutely nothing. She is bored out of her mind every day because she let herself become completely dependent on me.

    But my word wasnt based on what anyone deserved. I specifically said it remained the deal whatever happened and however angry I might be with her.

    It has to be said, she isnt normal. She suffers from an undiagnosed personality disorder and this hugely affects her behaviour. She isnt just horrible, its deeper than that.

    Her behaviour has been appalling and she is now horribly lonely and a bit helpless as a result. she is also having to come to terms with the fact that this is all her fault. she deserves all of that, no question, and I hope it leads to her trying to sort herself out. It wont

    she doesnt deserve to be chucked out of her home and left with nothing. And her mother certainly doesn't deserve to see her daughter conned out of her inheritance by a vengeful ex partner who gave his word he would never do that, under any circumstances.
    Well, there you go. Your decision is firm so stick with it, and ignore those who are telling you otherwise. I hope you at least got some decent rumpy pumpy somewhere along the way for all your troubles.

  3. #43
    Quote Originally Posted by Ash View Post

    Does she deserve it?
    The %age of the house or the kick in the ****?

  4. #44
    Quote Originally Posted by Ash View Post
    Well, there you go. Your decision is firm so stick with it, and ignore those who are telling you otherwise. I hope you at least got some decent rumpy pumpy somewhere along the way for all your troubles.
    Well I didnt stick around that long just for the abuse.....

    Everyone who knows me knows full well I wont change my mind so I dont know why they keep on at me about it.

  5. #45
    Quote Originally Posted by Peter View Post
    Well I didnt stick around that long just for the abuse.....

    Everyone who knows me knows full well I wont change my mind so I dont know why they keep on at me about it.
    Obstinate, obtuse, Denilson.

    3 words I associate with you P.


  6. #46
    Quote Originally Posted by Pokster View Post
    I know our circumstances are different, but if it comes to us going our own way I won't let the mum of my 3 kids struggle to afford a house, it isn't her fault she can't now work and medication doesn't seem to help ..... she is still a mum and any help i can give I will
    Yes, your situation is different but the principle is the same. With mine, she could work but only for a short period of time. Then there would be an argument and she would have to leave. It just wasnt worth the drama and she would burn through every company she could work for in a matter of months.

    I didnt mind looking after her but as the years went by the demands grew higher and more expensive and she left me to do everything. she literally wouldnt even put the bins out. I'd go to Malaysia for a week and come back to a house that looked like studnets lived in it.

    As hard as the last few months have been I am sort of glad it happened. It woke me up to some awful things that had become normalised in my head. I've been so unhappy in the relationship for years and have tried to leave so many times. Its best for both of us but she cant see that. She can only see how hard her life is going to be without me to support her.

    It's very sad but I had to get out. she has no intention of acknowledging her problems and seeking any help. Part of me hopes my leaving will prompt her to do this but I genuinely doubt it.

  7. #47
    A great man once said something I have certainly never forgotten and have always adhered to - "My word is as good as my signature".

    Do yo know who that great man was p? I'll give you a clue - he is now a silly old french tit.

    He also said "a querulous and vexing woman deserves a kick in ze cont"

  8. #48
    Quote Originally Posted by SWv2 View Post
    Obstinate, obtuse, Denilson.

    3 words I associate with you P.

    I could sum you up in three words but you wouldnt like it*


    * None of the words would relate to you being Irish. As documented, I'm very pro-Irish *

    * And jewish, before anyone starts.

  9. #49
    Quote Originally Posted by Peter View Post
    Well I didnt stick around that long just for the abuse.....

    Everyone who knows me knows full well I wont change my mind so I dont know why they keep on at me about it.
    Yes, mentallers can be quite fun in the sack.

    Good things happen to those who keep their word. Arsene kept his promises every time and he ended up ....

    Oh.

  10. #50
    Quote Originally Posted by Herbert Augustus Chapman View Post
    A great man once said something I have certainly never forgotten and have always adhered to - "My word is as good as my signature".

    Do yo know who that great man was p? I'll give you a clue - he is now a silly old french tit.

    He also said "a querulous and vexing woman deserves a kick in ze cont"
    I dont think he did say that but I take your point. What he certainly did do was play Alex Song at right back once. I will leave that one there.

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