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Thread: Have you ever sent someone a picture of ytour winkle?

  1. #51
    Quote Originally Posted by Herbert Augustus Chapman View Post
    Your boiler, a gas fired heating device, has no connection whatsoever with your waste water removal pipes. Surely even a whining filthy workshy money lending heebie soft-hand like yourself can comprehend this. You have fallen for a spurious correlation.

    Flushing knickers down the bog will almost always end in serious problems. The cotton, unlike tissue paper, does not dissolve and will almost certainly block your drain, partially at first, then fully as the rest of your waste material attaches itself to the knickers.

    The correlation you may have noticed between the plumber's visit and your wife's fanny size increasing markedly is far from spurious and is a direct cause and effect phenomenon.
    What about if I told you that the chaps who serviced the boiler also fiddled around with the stopcock while they were here?

    Also, you've essentially ignored my original question which was about the loud gurgling noises emanating from our plug holes that pre-date the unfortunate knickers-flushing incident by several weeks.

    What's causing that?

  2. #52
    Quote Originally Posted by Burney View Post
    Merely my poor homage to the Master, of course. I couldn't possibly hope to emulate him in any meaningful sense.
    Indeed. And so say all of us!
    "Plenty of strikers can score goals," he said, gesturing to the famous old stands casting shadows around us.

    "But a lot have found it difficult wearing the number 9 shirt for The Arsenal."

  3. #53
    Quote Originally Posted by Luis Anaconda View Post
    Does Bertie say "pshaw" and Psmith use "shaw" I wonder
    Very good, LA.
    "Plenty of strikers can score goals," he said, gesturing to the famous old stands casting shadows around us.

    "But a lot have found it difficult wearing the number 9 shirt for The Arsenal."

  4. #54
    Of course, they have to at least make it look as though they're earning their money, don't they.


    Oh, I see what you mean. Sorry


    Quote Originally Posted by Monty92 View Post
    What about if I told you that the chaps who serviced the boiler also fiddled around with the stopcock while they were here?
    "Plenty of strikers can score goals," he said, gesturing to the famous old stands casting shadows around us.

    "But a lot have found it difficult wearing the number 9 shirt for The Arsenal."

  5. #55
    Quote Originally Posted by Sir C View Post
    If you have: why?
    No, but at school, young Wilkins was commonly known as Winkle.
    "Plenty of strikers can score goals," he said, gesturing to the famous old stands casting shadows around us.

    "But a lot have found it difficult wearing the number 9 shirt for The Arsenal."

  6. #56
    Quote Originally Posted by Monty92 View Post
    What about if I told you that the chaps who serviced the boiler also fiddled around with the stopcock while they were here?

    Also, you've essentially ignored my original question which was about the loud gurgling noises emanating from our plug holes that pre-date the unfortunate knickers-flushing incident by several weeks.

    What's causing that?
    This I cannot possibly surmise without actually visiting your little basement flat in Willesden. PM your address and I'll slip round in the next couple of days.

    Your wife does, shall we say, allow the garden to grow?

  7. #57
    Quote Originally Posted by Burney View Post
    My favourite thing in the Psmith books is the way Mike Jackson at short notice pops to Lord's and knocks off a quick hundred. We've all been there.
    I love his description of one sad individual as having the look of a man who had once missed an important train and never really gotten over it.

    But as you suggest, so many to choose from.
    "Plenty of strikers can score goals," he said, gesturing to the famous old stands casting shadows around us.

    "But a lot have found it difficult wearing the number 9 shirt for The Arsenal."

  8. #58
    Quote Originally Posted by redgunamo View Post
    I love his description of one sad individual as having the look of a man who had once missed an important train and never really gotten over it.

    But as you suggest, so many to choose from.
    I'd go with "It is a good rule in life never to apologise. The right sort of people do not want apologies,
    while the wrong sort take a mean advantage of them."

  9. #59
    Quote Originally Posted by Burney View Post
    Merely my poor homage to the Master, of course. I couldn't possibly hope to emulate him in any meaningful sense.
    Having now been through the whole Jeeves oeuvre twice I tried my first Blandings and , though I managed to finish, felt something was missing. At the mention in the book of Sir Roderick Glossop I became misty eyed and nostalgic for Bertie and Jeeves.

    Have just finished Ben Schott's Jeeves and the King of Clubs and found it very wide of the mark. Far too many snappy one liners for Bertram methinks.

    Have you tried Faulks' attempt? I fancy you'd be too much the purist b to have bothered but 'red will be much less of a literary snob.

  10. #60
    Quote Originally Posted by Herbert Augustus Chapman View Post
    Having now been through the whole Jeeves oeuvre twice I tried my first Blandings and , though I managed to finish, felt something was missing. At the mention in the book of Sir Roderick Glossop I became misty eyed and nostalgic for Bertie and Jeeves.

    Have just finished Ben Schott's Jeeves and the King of Clubs and found it very wide of the mark. Far too many snappy one liners for Bertram methinks.

    Have you tried Faulks' attempt? I fancy you'd be too much the purist b to have bothered but 'red will be much less of a literary snob.
    I don't really see the point of that sort of thing, to be fair. If I want to read Wodehouse, then only Wodehouse will do. However good the imitation might be, it can only ever be clever pastiche at best - and as such, ultimately unsatisfactory.

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